Is it wrong for me to tell a child they CAN go to college? (parent said they couldn't)?

Question

I was asking a second grader what he wanted to be when he grew up and he said a police man. I responded, "Well, you can be anything you want to be. Just keep doing well in school so you can go to college and be a police officer".

The child responded, "My Mom said I can't go to college".

Answer 1

Are you a teacher? If you are you actually have a right to discuss this second graders future with his parent. I would probably have been shocked it I heard that. Kids pick up so many things maybe his family has money problems and he hears about it. I would tell him your mom doesnt decide if you go to college you do. Parents dont have to pay for college. Mine didnt. I got a scholarship and student loans. If he does well in school he CAN go to college!

Answer 2

I don't think so... who knows what was actually said/heard in THAT conversation.  I would definitely encourage the child. And,since I can't mind my own business... I would make it a point to run in to that mom and let her know her child said the CRAZIEST thing!!!!  See what her reaction is... maybe she said they couldn't pay for it, or maybe the kid said he wanted to go to college next year.   Hope it's some misunderstanding and not that the mom is a condescending jerk!

Answer 3

I think that you did nothing wrong.  If this is what the mother believes then the child needs someone giving him encouragement and pushing him towards his goals.  How sad would it be if this child grew up with no hope for reaching his goals.

Answer 4

Tell him it takes a lot of hard work to go to college, but you believe he can do it because he's hard working and dedicated and you know he would make a fantastic policeman.  Then tell him that college sometimes costs a lot of money, but there are ways that people find to pay for it and if he holds on to his dream of being a police officer, it will come true.  

Later, at a parent teacher meeting, mention what the  child said to the mother and see how she responds.  I'm wondering if either the child didn't understand what she said, or she is a single mother feeling overwhelmed with financial difficulties of every day life and maybe made that remark without much thought.

Be supportive of that child and help to keep their belief in their abilities and dreams alive.

Answer 5

The child may have misunderstood his Mom.  

There is nothing wrong with telling a child that he can do anything he wants in this life.

Answer 6

No it's not wrong for you to tell them they can go to college. My mom told me the same thing when i was a kid. We had no money for college. I was 30 before i realized i could get grants for college. I guess she never knew about things like that. Whenever i said i wanted to be something She would tell me it wasn't possible. Not a good way to raise a young child.

I tell my kids they can be anything they want to be. I also tell her to stick with girl scouts because she can get 1000 dollars to go to collage. I like my mother don't have money but, I don't think this will stop my kids from being able to attend college.

Answer 7

You are fine.  He is in second grade and a lot will change between now and college.  Just be supportive of this little boy.

Answer 8

Any one can go to college you did the right thing

Answer 9

Talk to the parents to get it straightened out but in a way so that the kid won't get in trouble. The family could have been talking about someone else.

Answer 10

And when you asked for more information by asking little Seymour, "Did your mom say WHY she thought you couldn't go to college?", what did he say?

Answer 11

I think that you need to ask more questions before telling anything.  Why did the parent say that?  Perhaps she meant he can't go at age 7.  You want to be very sure that you know the situation before you tell a second grader that his parents are wrong, bad, untrustworthy, etc.

Answer 12

You could say something like, "When you are bigger, you might end up going to college.  You will just have to wait and see what happens." Use a off-hand tone, so the suggestion is there, but you are not going against what the mother said.

Answer 13

I don't see anything wrong with it. I think I would have a talk with the parent and find out why they told the child they couldn't go. Noone should tell a child no matter how old they can't go to school. If they do they need someone like you to tell them diffrent and help them get there when the time comes.

Answer 14

Its not vvrong, the child is still very young. And I cant believe the mother vvould tell him he couldnt go to college, plus I dont see hovv that vvould even be talked about already, he is only in 2nd grade. He probably doesnt even knovv vvhat college is. lol

Answer 15

STAY OUT OF IT....its really none of your business. If his mom said it...unless you plan on paying for his'/her college...stay out of it...