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Is it wrong for this to bother me so much?

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Yesterday I was on a VERY crowded bus, seriously, you could hardly breath. Whilst I was on this bus a weird man was stood behind me. He got far closer to me that nessacery and when I tried to move away he moved with me. He groped my butt and did what I can only describe as rub his crotch on my butt. I was trying to move out the way but I just couldn't for lack of room. I know it wasn't just me making it up in my head, I could feel his hands on my legs, I was wearing a skirt you see.

When I got off the bus at my stop he stood on my shoe (flip flops) and followed me off. He then dissapered, and thankfully I haven't seen him since.

But his face just keeps coming into my mind and it makes me upset and cry when I think about it. Am I just being stupid about it? I'm not going to do anything about it or tell anyone I know, it just scares me so much. Honestly, does this happen to everybody all the time? Am I just being stupid?

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  1. It happens to everyone sometimes but you are definitely not freaking out. Anytime you are in an uncomfortable situation, it's  not okay for them to keep going. Whether you decide to tell them, or react is your decision but if you were uncomfortable and feeling violated you are definitely not just being stupid about it, telling someone could help you feel better but if you just want to let it pass then next time it happens you can know what to do from this, i learned that way too


  2. NO Your not being stupid. He is a freak. What he did was uncalled for. your feeling guilty but you didn't do anything wrong.  You do need to watch though and make sure he is not following you and maybe if you ride the bus constantly you should befriend another women you see a lot so your not alone and vulnerable. or when you get off the bus call and talk to someone a friend or your family so if he dose try something they can hear.

  3. oh honey i know exactly wat ur talking bout something similar has happened to me n i had the same feeling. turst me wen u wake up 2mrw u will feel so much better! wen it happened to me i always ended up blaming myself and if ur doing tht its NOT ur fault... tht man was a sicko! try to do something to keep ur mind off of it like watch tv or call up a frend n talk to her. and if u do ever see him agen n he does something TELL someone bout it!

    but trust me feeling will go away by tomorrow. jst do stuff tht makes u happy... give ureself a manicure tht always cheers me up!

    gd luck!

  4. Guys are perves and on a crowded bus they can make it seem like O we are just to close im sorry you know but he prob did grab your butt i dont doubt it

  5. no its not normal and its ok that it bothers you in that way because that was very inappropriate he sexually harassed you.. i think you should tell someone. maybe your mom or a friend it might make you feel just a little bit better.

    im sorry this happened to you..

  6. NO I WOULD BE SCARED AND CRY I FACT. I CRY WHEN SOME DUDES SITTING ON SOME STEPS GAVE ME CAT CALLS FROM ACROSS THE STREET.

    CARRY PEPPER SPRAY OR A METAL NAIL FILE IN YOUR PURSE. SADLY THERE ARE CREEPS OUT THERE AND WE NEED TO PROTECT OURSELVES. IT HAPPENS OFTEN ESPECIALLY TO WOMEN WALKING ALONE.

  7. well yes, this does happen all the time, unfortunatley. but you absolutely have the right to be upset about it. tell someone like a counselor or your parents if you fell comfortable with it. it will help even if it doesnt seem like it now.

  8. That's just wrong.Since you don'y know him or have seen him Since, you can't file him for sexual harrassment.

    Your so not being stupid, you have every right to be mad, sad and scared.You should also tell your parents.That way you can get it off your chest.

    But next time you go somewhere carry a cell phone on your And/or bring a friend.

  9. My dear Holly....

    Let me tell you something, honey ....There are some weird, disturbed folks "out there"& you MUST prepare yourself for such an incident (in case it mya happen again)!!!Here is what you shall (and  WILL) do, the "next" time you're in a similar situation : You turn around and say OUT  L O U D : "Keep your hands  OFF  my body"!!!! Get someone elses attention, scream if you have to, step on "his toes"- For god's sake.... DO   S O M E T H I N G !!!! Embarrass the creep!!! Call for the bus-driver, anything except being..."humble" or as quiet as you were....because when you're QUIET, that gives such a perverted person the opportunity to " continue" and that's the WORSE  thing you can do... So: for the future...scream & let the "public" get aware of what is happening!!!!! You're only ..."stupid", if you're ...QUIET...Don 't let such disturbed men get any chance to get "close to you" !!!! The worse thing you can do in such a case is...to be PASSIVE !!!! You see, sweety, men with such an "disorder" prey on passive young girls like you!!! So you always get into....ACTION !!!!

    Hope, you take my well-meant advice!!!Wish you all the best for the future...Greetings from Germany.... Annette***

  10. It is 100./. understandable why that makes you so upset. That is a terrible thing and does absolutely not happen to anyone. That man is gross and should be ashamed of himself. I do advise you to get help though, only because I had a personal experience with something similar to your situation when i was 12. I went on this website where you are supposed to email kids in other countries and become pen pals. I met some "kid" named mike We sent a few emails and he asked where i lived in one of them. I didn't say where but i thought he just wanted to know, so the emails continued for about 2 more days. Then he asked for a picture of me. I cried hysterically and didn't answer him back. I told 2 of my friends but that was it. I was very dead set that i didn't want to tell anyone else. But my friend stopped talking to me until i finally told my mom. I am so thankful that I did. All the time in school they gave speeches about how it stays with you. Honestly i would've probably broke down crying every time if my friend didn't make me tell my mom.

    So I strongly urge you to tell your parents. I know that it is very difficult but once you get through with it it's over and it won't stay with you anymore. And you will stop feeling the way you do.  I hope you do the right thing.

    ~Bre

  11. there are some freaks out there, get ur self some peper spay! ur not being stupid! its the smart thing to do, thats how helpless people get raped, this world is messed up

  12. Men are perverts. You honestly need to tell someone. This is not normal!

  13. thats acctually illegal i think he asulted you

  14. guys like that try to be slick, they think they are sneaky but they are not. this happened to me when i was in the 11th grade. i was standing in line in lunch and there were two boys playing behind me. one supposedly bumped into me and i felt his hands. i turned around and gave him warning stare and i just let it go. but then it happended again and turned around and pushed him. i got out of the line and reported the two and they were excused from the lunch room. since i didnt have any proof that i was sexual harrassed, they we off the hook.

    thats just me, when someone physcially mistreats me, i dont just let it go, i report it. the advice i give you is next time when youre on a bus, carry some mace, and be in a position to where you can watch them and not have your body parts so exposed. when a guy sits next to me on a bus, i take my backpack or whatever i have and put it on top of me so they wont be so slick or "accidental" to touch me. they can just touch the backpack.

    almost all we females have been there, girl. and yes it does make you cry and it does stay in your mind for a while becuase you feel violated. i've been there.

  15. How old are you?  You need to tell someone about it, just so they know to look out for a man like this.  I would even go as far as reporting it to the police so they know if they pick a man up like that that it isnt a first offense.  

    THis does NOT happen all the time and SHOULD NOT happen.  It does happen but only telling will prevent it from going farther.   You are right to feel however you feel about it but please tell an adult you trust about it!

  16. No, I dont think you are overreacting at all. Someone completely violated you, and made you feel as though you didnt matter. I think the worst thing about that situation, is that he did this so obviously. He didnt care what you thought about. How horrible for you. Something like that makes you feel helpless, and dirty. I have had that happen to me (similar experience), and I know it may not seem like a big deal to someone who hasnt had it happen. Im sorry, but I guess theres is nothing you can do now, except try not to think about it, and no it wasnt anything you did! What a jerk!

  17. 1. "am I being stupid about it?" no your not but if you see him again and he does it again tell some one

    2. "does this happen to everybody all the time" no most people aren't pedefiles but there are a lot of them

  18. god forbit the next time this happens you turn around and look the perv in the face and say loudly.  "what the F*CK do you think your doing." "get you stinking body parts of me your sick pervert:.. !!

  19. No, you're not stupid at all. A complete stranger ( who I think was older than you right? ) violated you, and there is no reason for you to accept that. This has happened to me before, and it would probably be better if you got some counseling or something, because even though it seems small, things like this are not easy to deal with. That's your body and your privacy.

  20. your not being stupid && its not in your mind...it happened.

    NOBODY AT ALL has the right to do something like that.its lack of respect && just perverted.tell someone you trust about this && cry all you need to holding it in wont do you any good AT ALL!!....

    i think you shoudl tell the police && give a description of the man...that way they can find him && prevent it form happening ot other girls.:[[

    im so sorry it happened to you...these days the world is just so d**n perverted.

  21. That's creepy, but hey at least you know you're s**y right? Only attractive girls get harrassed as much. Try to take it as a compliment.

  22. He is a jerk. He shouldn't be touching and you definitely need to tell someone and next time you go to a bus, bring a friend with you.

    If I were you, I would slap him so hard and that's what we, girls do!

  23. No

    It would bother me to.

    I think that you should call the police.

    Did you even know the guy?

    If not thats creepy!

    Wait maybe he knew you but you didnt remerber him!

    Your not stupid or it isnt wrong to behave like this. I would prob be worreid to!

  24. You're not being stupid, if it was me, I'd cry too. If you're really scared tell your mother or your father. Buy some pepper spray and try not to let anyone bother you.
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