Is it wrong of me to feel left out?

Question

My in laws went on a short week end trip and didn't invite me or my kids. I would have drove my own car and paid my own way. It was to go school clothes shopping. I usually don't get invited to go any where with my in laws (my husbands sisters). When I expressed my hurt feelings to my husband he said he knew about the trip for a couple of days. He said he didn't think it was any big deal that I wasn't invited and that I didn't need to go any way. I felt kind of hurt after that. He put it in a way like I am not good enough to hang out wit his family. But I am expected to participate in Holiday gatherings and provide gifts and buy dinners all the time. I don't under stand why they exclude me and my kids so much. We take time during the week to visit them and no one ever comes to see us. Should I just stop and cut them off????

Answer 1

No don't cut them off ,it just proves your a better person than they are!!

Answer 2

I wouldn't invite them around period, except when I absolutely had to, for example Christmas Day only.  See how they like it.  Btw love your hair!

Answer 3

Yes, just stop and make your own plans. While you're at it, make your own holiday plans as well. If they don't want to include you, there's no reason to play their silly little games. I have a sister that's been dealing with this kind of thing for years.Stop making weekly visits and when they ask where you've been, let them know they are free to visit if they want.  Plan your own trips with your kids and enjoy yourself. :)

Answer 4

I think that you might be over reacting.  My extended family (not in laws) go on short weekend trips occasionally and don't invite me.  I don't expect to be invited.  Those are trips for their family to go and enjoy and spend quality time together.

Just based on what you posted you sound clingy and needy.  you say you spend time with them during the week.  Were you invited or did you invite yourself?  Do you give them the chance to call you about hanging out or are you the one who is always calling so they don't have to do any work in the relationship?

I don't think you should cut them off.  I think you should not spend so much time with them.  I think you should give them the chance to call you.  I think you need some friends outside of your family.  I think you need some activities or hobbies to occupy your time.  You have too much free time on your hands if you are taking slights where none are intended.  It's not all about you.  People, even family, have lives and concerns and wants and needs that have nothing to do with you.

Answer 5

I go places with my sisters and I dont even think of inviting my sister in laws as they have their own sisters. So if you want to do sister stuff call your own sisters. Maybe you are there often so you dont give them a chance to invite you places because they know they will see you soon or have already seen you.  If you still feel slighted by them , then stick with your own family and let him attend holidays etc with his family and if they ask tell them right out why..

Answer 6

so people don't like u, big deal. live with it or try to be a better person. there is no reason in blaming others for not accepting u if u re an unpleasant person

Answer 7

Doesn't your hubby see what's going on here?? How is he that oblivious of this situation? That is so rude that they don't invite you anywhere - god i would be so hurt - try your best to just "get over it" and get over them - they're not genuine people at all, you're better off not letting your kids around people like that either, or keep it at a minimum...

Answer 8

Aww id feel the same way if it were me.  Yea, its mean of them especially if u want to. I mean its cool that u wana be involved in his families life. Most wifes don't like In laws.  

If I were u, YESSSSSSSS I would cut them off in my life till they came to me.  U have showed enough and now its their turn.  Why do You have2 do all the work.  

Answer 9

You're getting all worked up because these people didn't invite you on a shopping trip? You sound like they were refusing to see you ever again. You need to find your own interests and stop relying on other people for your happiness.  

Answer 10

Wow, have I been walkin' in your shoes or what ? I am still nice, I bite my tongue alot, but I don't go outta my way anymore to please these people. It's their loss!!

You are not expected to kiss these peoples butts are you? Seems like thats what you have been doing, just like me. Let your husband buy the dinners.

Most of all follow your heart, but don't be easy either. I'm sure you have other friends you can do these things with, sound like they are jealous or something.

Pray about it, best wishes for you my friend.