Is it wrong to cut them out of my life?

Question

Ok, my younger brother is g*y, our parents are very religious and when they found out they said that he is dead to them and that he isn't their son. I knew they would react like this, my brother has self hate issues because of them. So he will now be living with me which is what I want and what he wants. After they sign over custody of him I want nothing to do with them. Is it wrong for me to cut them out of my life completely?

Answer 1

IF you judge them for their ignorance and stupidity then you are no better than them.  Don't cut them out but give them the opportunity to come around if they will accept your brother as their son.  If you cut them out it only makes the chances of resolving the issues that much harder.   Hopefully, they will come around...if not..you know that your door is always open...and it was their ignorance that blinded them..not yours.

Answer 2

i agree that it is wrong for your parents to regect their own son for something that he cant even control. maybe instead of cutting off your parents, you could try to talk to them?

srry, idk if that helps...

good luck!

Answer 3

Absolutely not.  Especially if you plan on having children of your own and a family someday.  Why would you want people filled with hatred to be anywhere near them?  

Your brother needs love and support right now and he has that in you.  Give him all you have and thank your stars that you have each other to depend on.  

I am sorry your parents are so bigoted but perhaps losing both of their children might open their eyes to the world around them.  Good luck!

Answer 4

That is a very touchy subject and if I were you, I would give your parents time. i would not complete sever all ties, but that is your parents. I would give them time to adjust because hopefully they will eventually come around. So basically I wouldn't never talk to them again but definitely give them space, because right now emotions are high. I hope they come around

Answer 5

just be there for your brother thats the only thing you can do. its very hard to cut any family member out of your life forever. but what ever you do never let them try make you not talk to him. h**l need all the family he has got and i bet he is glad hes got you. if you can do it its not wrong it might just hurt all parties. im sorry that its really does not seem to be un conditional love i hope you and your bro are ok

Answer 6

This is just my opinion but, I think that it would be a very good idea for both of you to keep your distance from them for awhile and just see it they will come around.  Unfortunately, we can't make people change and, hopefully, after not seeing their children for a time, will bring them around.  Sometimes it takes us parents awhile to come around to our children's life choices.  I would never have taken their stance with my kids but maybe they just need some time to come around.  On the other hand, they may not because of their religious issues...and that is what they are...issues.  Sounds to me like your brother needs some time apart from them to heal...so maybe this is a good thing to happen now that he is young.  Good luck to both of you!!!!

Answer 7

Yes, lifes too short. You dont have to live in each others pockets but try to keep some lines of communication open. You never know, blood is thicker than water and they might come round and at the end of the day they are your parents

Answer 8

no, I don't think so.  it's a shame that people feel this way.  so willing to take what other people say as fact instead of doing their own research.  i mean, homosexuality has been studied very much over that past few years and it's nature and nurture...not a choice!

Answer 9

We don't choose our families, you are free to

make your own choices.

Answer 10

It is only wrong if it feels wrong to you. If they were really that religious then why don't they forgive your brother for his sins?  

Answer 11

I wouldn't cut them out of your life! I personally think a little break, apart will help wonders. If your brother wants someone else to talk to about his self hate issues, have to go to group therapy. After a few months of a break and some much needed help im sure it will work it self out. Im sure your brother bringing up the issue of him being g*y, was a surprise to your parents, and once they get the chance to take it all in, they will come around.

Hope all works out!

Victoria

Answer 12

Honestly if I was in that situation I would not talk to my parents anymore. They have to learn to respect his decisions. If he is happy with his live then I feel your parents should be. Thats just how I feel about that.

Answer 13

No, it's not wrong for you to cut them out of your life. If they honestly can't accept your brother for who he is, then what kind of parents are they? From what you've written, they obviously can't and won't change, and supporting your brother is more important than respecting your parents. It's really courageous of you to take in your brother...you're a really good person for not judging him.