Is it wrong to dislike your mother in law?

Question

A friend of mine cannot stand her mother in law? She takes over with my friends kid and constantly puts my friend down... On a few occasions she has done un orthodox things that have really hurt my friends feelings? Example: The mother in law didnt like the hairstyle of my friends kid so took her to the hair dresser and got the kids first haircut without the parents permission.

My friend refuses to stand up to her for fear of her husbands disapproval how do you tell a close family member to back the *$&# up???

Answer 1

As much as this upset you, your friend is the one that is going to have to grow a set and make some boundaries with her MIL.  She needs to talk with her husband about how she feels and he should support her.  He should stand up to his mother, when she oversteps.  Meanwhile, she needs to address each small issue as it occurs and let her MIL know that it is inappropriate or that she didn't appreciate it.  No one respects someone they can walk all over.

Answer 2

Your friend, when she gets another insult such as....  

You look like she-it today, should look her in the eye and say with a chuckle...

When the kids grow up and I'm your age, I'll be able to catch up on my rest.

If she says something like... can't you make them behave, you could say....

No, I've tried screaming my lungs out and beating them, but they won.

If she says your hair looks like c**p....giggle and say...

I know you must be kidding because you are to nice to be that mean (or that insulting, or that much of a bee-ach).

Answer 3

It's very common for mother-in-laws to be straight up b*tches lol.  I have rarely met a person who got along with their mother-in-law.  Your friend has to set boundaries and let the mother-in-law know her role !

Answer 4

I know where your friend is coming from, is not that I dislike my own but its just that she has become very difficult. Its possible that her MIL is old and likes it this way but she doesn't understand that been helpful is been quite interfering.

Answer 5

no...cuz my mom hates my grandma

i love both so no comment ^ ^

Answer 6

She needs to discuss this with her husband, and her husband needs to be supportive and speak with his mother.  After all, it is his mother.  She needs to explain to him, that although she is grateful that his mom wants to be involved in their child's life, that there are boundaries.  That they are the parents, and if there is something the MIL doesn't like, she's more than willign to discuss it with them, but they still have the final say.

Answer 7

It really is up to your friend. At least she is showing an interest in the kids welfare. Some MIL's don't.

I'm more interested in how the kid feels about the haircut and his grandma.

You said the MIL is taking over the kids.... how does that work? Does she nanny the kids? Do they live with her? Cause if so then it makes perfect sense she would be very involved with the kids.