Is marriage counseling enough to fix my marriage?

Question

I'm looking for an honest answer on what I should do. I am a stay at home mom and my husband works full time. I recently found out he's having a relationship with someone else but its not another woman, its a man. I tried confronting both of them of the situation. My husband says nothing is going on its just a friend however the "boyfriend" is stating that he didn't know he was married with 2 kids and will not stop the relationship.

Is marriage counseling enough to fix this marriage?

Answer 1

It's worth a shot, but if your husband is attracted to men, I don't see how that could end positively for you.  

Answer 2

I'm sorry..but if a man is having an affair with another man...that generally means he's g*y...or at the very least, bisexual. Counseling can NOT fix that. No amount of talking to a therapist can change someone into something they are not. Your husband likes men...you can't grow a p***s and facial hair on a whim when he gets in the mood for men...so I'm not sure what exactly you weant a therapist to do for you two.

Force him to stay in a marriage when he MIGHT not be attracted to women?  What will you do when he strays again to take care of the man on man urge he obviously gets? Granted I know it's not fair for a woman to stay in a relationship with an unfaithful man, regardless of circumstances...but the point in fact is...counseling will not make hin "un-g*y". All it will do is help you to accept him as he is...and maybe even bring out some other embarrassing truths that you probably don't want to know about.

He either wants to be married to a woman...or wants a relationship with a man...he can't have both unless you are in the rare circumstance that you don't mind sharing...and most women are not likely to share so openly.  

Answer 3

Marriage counseling can help, not sure if it can fix your marriage. You and your husband need to figure out if you want things to work out and continue being married.  Your husband needs to avoid the "boyfriend" and worry more about his family.

Answer 4

Could your husband be telling the truth?If he is ,then having a male friend is more like a brother.If he is a "boyfriend" then you need to put your foot down and tell him that he is NO FRIEND and the relationship MUST be terminated or there is NO MARRIAGE.Just because this other man may be g*y does not mean that your husband is, but he might be bisexual or he might be persuaded into doing something he shouldn't do out of curiosity and find that he is involved.Counseling could clarify his position more clearly for you if he is not forthright with it, but if he discovers he is g*y or bisexual,I personally would cut the cord and get on with my life,as there is no competition with another man .He can't have it both ways as that is not a marriage.Counseling will help you to understand where you both are at and may set you both back on track but you may find that the truths revealed may be tough to accept yet the truth is worth the effort and dealing with it in counseling will help you to move on if neccesary.It is worth the effort.I wish you the best of luck...Rose

Answer 5

Maybe but most likely not.

If your husband is still lying to you and/or in denial about the affair then I don't see much hope..

Im sorry =*( that sounds horrible and with kids and all so much harder as well as cheating is putting your health at risk and no I'm not a homophobe its not because he's having a g*y affair at all but normally people don't use condoms with oral s*x and that is an issue..

Either way take the kids and go stay with family for awhile to deal with your own head space before you even deal with this because it's a pretty serious problem.

Answer 6

I say no. If this man is interested in other men what would keep him with you and why would you want to stay with him. Its hard enough to compete with other women. I cant imagine competing with other men. I would say find counseling for yourself and work out things (seperating the marriage) with him the best you can for the sake of the kids.  

Answer 7

You will not know till you try. Sorry to hear this, I just divorced after 31 years, he cheated with another female. I couldn't put up with his c**p any more. I wish you the best.

Answer 8

Marriage counseling only goes as far as both parties involved take it. If your husband is bi sexual then nothing is going to change that. The man has something that you can't give him and that's a totally different ballgame. I would be packing if I were you.

Answer 9

Whether it's male or female, it is absolutely wrong of your husband to put the responsibility for ending the relationship on the other person.  If he cared about your marriage, he would end the relationship in no uncertain terms.  The fact that he has not done so means that the prognosis for your marriage is poor.  In order for marriage counseling to work, both people have to want to change.