Is my baby sitter OVER reacting?

Question

oky here's the story.....usually everytime i pick up my son i just hunk and waited in the car.

now she told me its better if i get him thru her door and walk with him for safety......i mean her door and my car is just few step away(not even 10step away).....my son his not a baby any more his almost 8yrs old...is she over reacting?

Answer 1

maybe that's what your son wants you to do. But yeah, I'd call it that I guess.

Answer 2

Probably yes. But there may be some drama that happened in the past that made her think that way. Or she could be scared that you would sue if something happened in those 10 steps.

Hope this helps.

Answer 3

Yeah she is way way way over reacting. That is to the point of rediculous!!!

Answer 4

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Answer 5

although your child is old enough to walk by himself from the door to the car it is almost disrespectful to just honk for him instead of getting off the car and going to the door so that you have a chance to talk with the sitter if maybe something has happened throughout the day that you need to know about or even just to say thanks for keeping him safe one more day!

Answer 6

Yeah.  Very much so. If this is what you and your child are comfortable with doing then it's not up to her to tell you how to parent your child.

Answer 7

My son's babysitter required the same thing. It wasn't that she was over reacting but because she was a state licensed child care provider and those are the rules. Also she had younger kids who needed to be taught that you don't go out the front door unless accompoied (spelling) by an adult. My son is 8 and I realize that he is not a baby anymore but anything that could keep him safer no matter how mundane I would do it. Remember both of you are concerned about the welfare of your son. What's 10 steps in comparison to your son's safety? She may just be following rules not set by her. I don't think it's over reacting.

Answer 8

I don't think she's over reacting.  I've worked in child care and generally the parents have to sigh in and out for the protection of the children.  Also, as someone else said, don't you want to know how your son's day went?  How can the sitter be sure it's you in the car?

Answer 9

shes over reacting and YOU are the kids mother....ask her exactly why she feels this way.

Answer 10

yea but just to keep her calm walk him to the door. it will show that you care about his saftey (for those ten steps ahah)

but that you love him and are willing to do wat e're it takes to show it.

Answer 11

way over reacting.......

i know kids that walk longer to the school bus stop and they are fine at that age..

Answer 12

Well, she may have some training or some advice about babysitting. See if she is watching him and other kids, she cannot leave her house and the other kids unattended and while he is traveling to your car he is still on her property and still in her care until you take physical custody of him. She's not trying to make it inconvenient for you, just being very smart and sounds like if she is that on top of it I bet your son recieve awesome care!

Answer 13

i'd be worried about what else she is overreacting about with your son...that is very weird

Answer 14

Yes, whats the big deal?

Answer 15

An 8 year old is obviously old enough to walk from your car to her door. She's probably just trying to cover her butt. She may be thinking that if your son tripped/fell/whatever while he was unattended that you'd go after her.

Answer 16

No. Your babysitter is not overreacting. What if somebody else just sat outside her house, honked and she sent your kid out to them? You would be incensed with her!  

After all, it's not even 10 steps away.

Answer 17

I always walk to the door to pick up my children but some moms just honk and have their kids walk to their car.  I think it's a personal preference.  I happen to think that it's rude to honk because it not only alerts the person you are visiting but also the neighbors.

Answer 18

as for if he is old enough and safety issues..yes she is over reacting. however...if I babysat and took care of someone else's child...and they didn't have the decency to come to the door and knock to ask how I'm doing, and how they're own child did, and to say thank you..I would totally think that person was ignorant and had no manners what so ever. its just a matter of decency and respect and politeness really. and I mean...what kind of respect is that teaching your child? I mean...they're not important enough for someone to get out of the car for them..give them a hug and open the car door for them? and what kind of manners and respect does that teach them about the care giver? children learn by example...if they see you not telling someone thank you for something they did for you...how will they know to say thank you? also..if she watches other kids...she may not have the opportunity to get him ready while your sitting out there honking your horn..making her feel like she has to rush, and rush him out of her house, or what if there was a concern or problem that she wanted to talk to you about? or maybe she has a sweet nice funny story to share with you about your son...but she may not necessarily have the ability to stand out at your car talking to you about it...especially if she has her own children or watches other children....it wouldn't be safe for her to leave them in the house alone while she talks to you. I mean really...do you really just sit out in your car and honk for your son? no Hi? to the babysitter? or thank you? or goodbye? or "how was my son?" etc etc etc. I guess I'm just different..but it does seem a bit rude. is it safe for you to just honk your horn? Yes..is it respectful and polite and well mannered? NO.

Answer 19

She is overreacting and I would ask her why.  As other poster mentioned, kids of that age walk to school.

Answer 20

if she has other children she may not know if you are out there or not how would she know if he left with someone other than you how would she know if he just went out side on his own, if she is state certified she could lose her license for letting him go with out adult supervision no she is being a responsible adult.

Answer 21

I think that's a little ridiculous..  but maybe she's doing it b/c she's worried about being sued in case he falls or something?  Unless you sit out there and honk and honk - do you?  Maybe she doesn't like the "being rushed" feeling and would rather you wait inside instead of out in the car while she gets your son ready? Not sure.. I think it's a little weird.  Just tell her that you are comfortable with him walking to your car on his own and that should be enough.  Good luck

Answer 22

You don't talk with the sitter to see how his day was?     Most parents want to know if their child came back from school happy/sad/mad, etc; or if there were any other problems during the day.

I agree with the other poster who mentioned the neighbours as well.  That would really tick me off if I had to hear a car honking every day.  

If it's only 10 steps would it really be that hard for you to get out of your car to walk up to the door instead of disturbing the neighbourhood?  Perhaps she'd had complaints.

Answer 23

Well, I can't imagine that she's let you get away with it for this long.  Most sitters have very strict rules that they have to follow to cover their own liability for insurance purposes, and state regulations.  My own sitter requires not only that the child be time clocked in and out but that the parent sign for the physical condition of the child upon dropping him/her off and picking him/her up.  (That came after there was a parent CPS was investigating that kept showing up with bruises the parent tried to blame on daycare)  You certainly couldn't verify your sons safety from the car!  Also, what happens if there is something she needs to discuss with you?  She can't leave the other kids alone in the house to come out to you - so what is she supposed to do?  Is there some reason you're trying to avoid your sitter?  

Honking the horn MIGHT be acceptable when picking an 8-year-old up from a relative or a play date if you and the other adults involved have a relationship where that wouldn't be considered offensive, but is definitely a bad idea for daycare!