Is my childs behaviour normal?

Question

I am extremely worried about my almost 3 year old daughter. She has been pretty easy up until now and all of a sudden in the last few days she has been having tantrums if I ask her to do something or if I say no. She gets really aggressive and hits, bites and kicks me as well as screams. This goes on for about 30 minutes. I thought tantrums started at a younger age and am worried this is not normal. I try and stay calm but she totally loses it. There have been no changes in the last week or anything out of the ordinary. I end up in tears by the end of it. Could anyone please advise me if this is normal toddler behaviour and what I can do to deal with it. I dont smack her. If I put her in time out she gets out. I put her back and it goes on and on and she gets more angry. I try ignoring her and I tell her when she is ready to talk nicely I will listen but she holds on to my clothes and follows me.

Answer 1

my daughter started tantrums at 3. They lasted 2 weeks. I ignored them stepped over her and did not pay her any attention till she was acting normal again. They soon stopped. If she is hitting bitting and kicking then I would dump her on the bed and shut the door. That is way too far to ignore

Answer 2

Yes your child is normal, but you need to learn how to show her who's boss. A smack never hurt me when i was a kid, my dad used to take the belt to my *** when i was really bad, better yet i'm a better person for it now. If you would prefer not to smack her, then the other option is to put her in her room, shut the door behind you, hold the handle shut if you have to and wait until she finishes her tantrum, so that she is not near you to physically harm you or herself. It sounds cruel but it actually does work. Then when she is finished bring her out of her room and ask her if she knows why she was in her room, if she doesn't explain to her that her tantrums are not acceptable behaviour and that when she throws them she will be put in her room, every time she throws a tantrum. Eventually she wll get sick of going to her room, when she is naughty, and the tantrums will stop. It worked for me!!!!!!!!

Answer 3

You shouldn't worry about your child. Tantrums are a normal and natural part of every child's life, especially at this young of an age. I think that you need to be forceful with her, or this could turn into a serious problem. Timeouts won't always work, buy try spanking. You might feel bad about it, but she has to know that her behavior is not okay. But remember, to never let the punishment be more than spanking.

Answer 4

wow hunn that seems really hard, I have two children and I did go through a phase like that with them.  I had to put up two baby gates stacked on top of eachother and keep them in their rooms as time out.  I could have just shut the door to drown them out but just to be safe i did that.  I had to walk away and ignore them just to stay sane.  It may take a wk or two for her to realize that everytime she does something wrong she will be punished.  You have to be consistent and dont give in or u will be sorry.  I found out the hard way with the first baby the second I got a little more stern.  I know it seems harsh but it beats spankings.  She is just testing your patients hunn, just try ur best and take breaks from her.  Walk outside and just breathe.  I hope this helps

Answer 5

Gosh, I went through that with my son when he turned three.  Terrible twos?  I dont think so!  Threes were h**l for me with him!  I have no advice for you other than to try and get breaks from her when you can, that way you will not go insane!!

Answer 6

lady you need to smack your kid on the *** and make eye contact and make sure she knows who's in charge and talk firm right in her face and if she does not listen smack her on the ***  you have to spank your kid at that age

Answer 7

Is there such a thing as a "normal" child?

Answer 8

My 3 year old started having tantrum at the same time; she woulb be dreadful and she is the size of 5yr old so when she would get vatratewd there was very little I could do but to simply ignore it.

Just pay no attention to the behaviour because any attention whether positive or negative is rewarding her. It took my daughter about a month to realise that it made no difference to me whether she carried on; so tantrum became much short and less frequent. it just a faze and it will pass.

Answer 9

Well I know that a lot of moms may not agree with me but I believe in the old fashion spanking...tantrums can start at any age but if you let them know that you will not tolerate such outburst then she'll eventually realize that tantrums don't work... She's 3...she's old enough to know what she is doing.. I would get her up...and tell her that Mommy is not going to put up with kind of actions...Tell her the next time she throws herself on the floor that she is going to get a spanking...and sent to her room....When she throws the trantrum...spank her and tell her didn't mommy tell you you were going to get a spanking...then spank her...and sit her down in a chair and make her sit there to think about what she just did...then before she gets up...get down on her level...look her in the eyes and ask her Why did mommy spank you?  and let her answer ...then tell her mommy loves you but she will not accept those tantrums...and if you do it again...you are going to spank her again...let her know that its her choice rather she gets another spanking but that you mean business... She will try you as long as you let her get by with it... this is discipline that works...it may be hard on you but it has the best rewards in the long run....they learn that mommy means what she says....your the boss...HH

Answer 10

Tantrum throwing can start at any age.  I suggest you get a child gate and set it up in the doorway of her room.  When she has a melt down put her in the bedroom and walk away do NOT lecture her on her behavior...she doesn't understand.  Just put her in her room and do not say anything.

Answer 11

Your daughter has begun to realize that she is a separate person and has begun asserting herself. I have 3 children and found a very effective method was the time out you suggested. The only difference is, you need to remove her to her room, tell her that she is going there to get herself under control. When she has calmed down, she may come out. Obviously she will just come out, which is why you may need to hold the door closed until she calms down - this is not necessarily easy- as your reaction is to try to help her!! You will only have to do this once or twice before she realizes and may even take herself to her room when she needs to regain control!! By doing this, you are merely letting her know that some behaviours are unacceptable in public- this can then be used as they continue to grow! Good luck.

Answer 12

Three is so much worse than two, you have to stick with your punishments even if that means putting her in time out 300 times in an hour, Three year old brains are developing very fast but there language isn't so they get easily frustrated, they have all these new emotions and no way to express them, but to hit, scream and bite. Good luck stay patient it won't last forever she will only be three for a short time.

Answer 13

She's getting old enough to have a mind of her own and she is testing you.  You need to show her consistent discipline and make sure she knows you aren't going to tolerate her behavior.  It IS normal.

Answer 14

I think that mothers know their own kids so if you really think this is sudden and unexplained then go see your own doctor just to reassure yourself. Does she go to childcare or is she looked after by a friend at any time where things may be happening that you don't know about? She may just have discovered free will a little late but there may be something upsetting her that you don't have control over.

Answer 15

Tantrums are worse at 3 then 2.  Tantrums don't last 30minutes, that is a meltdown.  Where it is true that for behavior, you want to ignore for extinction, it may be sensory and that she can't help it.  Have her screened for sensory intergration dysfunction.  Anytime a child's behavior is completely exasperating for a parent to the point of the parent breaking down it is best to pay a visit to a neurologist just to make sure something neurological isn't going on

Sensory integration does not occur for  any child before the age of 6, your child may need some help with it.