Is quiet shy?

Question

i am a quiet person by nature but i am not lacking in confidence - i think i am an awesome person i am just reserved and open up when i want to. what do you think. are quiet people shy and unconfident or can society get over the fact that not everyone is a loud-mouthed extrovert?

Answer 1

I agree with you.  

I think you're shy if you have an opinion and want to voice it but you don't because you're not sure if people will pay attention to what you've said or that they won't find it interesting or for another similar reason.

If you're just generally quiet it could be that you just don't feel like participaing in every topic of conversation which is going on around you.

Answer 2

Being quiet doesn't necessarily equal to 'shy', you're right. Some people prefer to hold off judgement and have their say once they have weighed up the consequences of a situation or debate. Some people jump straight in there, all guns blazing. That doesn't necessarily mean that they are even extroverted - they may just feel strongly about a certain topic being discussed.

Human qualities are a hard thing to measure - there are generally no hard and fast rules, everyone is different in their approaches to things..

Answer 3

Not necessarily.

In your case, I'd have to say "No."

Each person is born somewhere on the "noisiness" continuum. Although most people associate not being a chatter-box with being shy or lacking confidence, as you point out, it ain't necessarily so.

Can society get over this mistaken notion? Yes, and probably will, eventually. If more people knew more psychology, they wouldn't make these kinds of mistakes.

If you look on this site -- especially in the Family & Relationships categories -- you'll see the consequences so many suffer because they are indiscriminate in who they open up to.

What's especially striking is how many people, who KNOW from past experience that their friend blabs their confidences, still expect them to suddenly not do so.

Knowing as you do that people tend to mistake quiet for shy, you'll just have to deal until enough people know enough to make the distinction.

Answer 4

no...if one is quiet doesn't mean he/she is shy or unconfident...in my country we have a saying "never be afraid of one who talks a lot be afraid of one who doesn't!"

Another thing: is it society that needs to "get over the fact that not everyone is a loud-mouthed extrovert " or.......You?

I'm sorry I'm gonna be a bit sarcastic just cant help myself! If you are a confident person (quiet though) - why in the world you are even bothered asking this question? ;-)

Answer 5

I dont think all quiet people are some might be, I agree with you, society needs to get over the fact that not all people are loud or have to be loud

Answer 6

it's not that your unconfident people should give other people a chance just because if they're quiet || shy...they should realize that everyone isn't a loud mouthed extrovert

Answer 7

I think you're trying to compensate your low self-esteem by projecting to other people that you're confident. There's i big difference between self-esteem & confidence; (in my own theory) confidence is more external, something you show or project to people when you're narrating, giving seminars or talks. Unlike self-esteem which is actually internal; you're personal preference & view of yourself, the way you act and think of different circumstances & instances, and basically, intrapsychic conflicts. I think you're trying to manipulate what kind of personality people want to think of you. don't get me wrong, it's not bad. it's just unhealthy. you should -i think- try and go on searching for your own definition of yourself for that matter.

Answer 8

i feel kind of like that, it takes a long time before i can talk to someone without being nervous, so i am shy, but at the same time i like my personality, i'm just a bit frustrated that it doesn't show itself straight away

& good for you for choosing not to be one of those 'loud-mouthed extroverts'

Answer 9

im practically mute but im not shy at all.

Answer 10

Quiet means when you talk you talk softly and old people can't hear you.  Shy means you don't talk as willingly or as much to strangers until you feel more like opening up.  You decide.

Answer 11

No two different things.

Answer 12

Remember the saying: Empty vessel makes the most noise? From experience some of the most dumbassed people i've ever known are loud, obnoxious people who shoot off words and think later!

Answer 13

to answer you questions,

1. quiet people are not shy and unconfident

and

2. society can't get over the fact that not everyone is a loud-mouthed extrovert

i'm like you. quiet and reserved, but i'm not shy.

When i decide to speak, it is usually something meaningful and when i do speak, people listen.

it's okay to be quiet and reserved but it is difficult in making friends especially when it seems like everyone else is outgoing and extroverted.

if you have more questions feel free to email me

Answer 14

I don't think quiet means shy, just that you want to suss people out before talking to them too much - self preservation really.

Answer 15

u are shy so am i

Answer 16

Being quiet does not have a lot to do with being shy.  Being shy means that you don't do well in social situations.  For example, I can be quiet at times.  However I do not have a problem being social.  I talk but only when I feel like it.  It just means that you are a reserved person which is ok.