Is slapping a three year old in the head child abuse?

Question

My friend recently struck her 3 year old on the side of the head by his ear after he bit her 1.5 year old while we were driving out of town. It was a pretty hard hit, but open handed, and he did cry. I was shocked, and I told her that many people would report her for child abuse. She told me what she does with her own children is none of my business, and when I insisted, she pulled over to the side of the road and kicked me out, leaving me stranded in a strange city and waiting 2 hours for someone to show up to get me. What would your reaction have been? Do you think that's child abuse? Would you as a parent have reacted the same way to my remark?

Answer 1

Definitely child abuse.  I would report her to child protective services. Thats no way to treat a child.

Answer 2

I dont think she was right in hitting her 3 yrd old, no matter what he did. Now had she been in the street, she could have been easily reported to Child Care Services. Im not sure if that's child abuse... I just dont think it's good parenting.... u can report her anonimously (sp?) because if she hit her 3 yr old on the head then Im sure she spanks them and swats them... etc which is not right at all.

We dont know how often she hits them, if she was so openly striking him in the head while YOU were there... imagine what she'd do if the kid misbehaves at home?

It doesnt look very good, to be honest. If I were u I'd report her... without saying who I am.

Answer 3

I am so pleased that someone felt strongly enough to say something! Good on you.

I completely agree with you and I do think it is abuse.

I would not hit my child in the first place so no-one would ever say that to me in the first place.

Answer 4

Umm,

I think that your friend was way out of line with what she did. Yes, the 3 year old was very wrong in biting the 1 year old. She could have gone about it a different way.Yes the child should be punished, but I do not believe that anyone should hit a child in the head or the stomach.

And she was definitely way out of line for kicking you out of the car. That was really uncalled for. Yes she was upset because she doesn't want people to tell her how she should discipline her kids but like I said, she could have gone about it a different way.

If you see her do that again, or even do something worse, report her immediately. Because if she doesn't have any shame smacking the c**p out of her child in public, just imagine what she does to when they are behind closed doors.

Listen to your intuition, do what you think is right.

God Bless

Answer 5

We wouldn't be friends anymore and that's for sure, and just try to watch out for the sake of the kids because she does seem like an angry person...

Answer 6

let me show you from her point of view. you said " many people would report you for child abuse" she had a remark as any parent would. and you insisted that what she did was wrong instead of saying " why did you hit him in the head why not on the hand?" do you see the difference and what you could have said. she was upset at you comment I don't think she should have hit him in the head but her reaction was out of frustration from her son and from your attack on her. I don't think you should call cps because they aren't going to find anything en less you have proof of other abuse. I spank my daughter but I would never hit her on the head. spankings should only be done on the behind or hand.

and if you have kids but don't spank them you should never never voice your opinion to someone who does it always causes an argument.and if you don't have a kids then you should never comment on how someone disciplines their child not just in this circumstance but any circumstance.

Answer 7

Yes, that was child abuse, and yes, you were right to stand up to her.

Answer 8

If I was driving a car and one of my children was biting or attacking another child, I would slap what ever part of the child's body is accessible to get his/her immediate attention and stop the behavior.  If the mother did nothing to protect the younger child from the abuse of the older child, that could have been construed as child abuse too.  So she was damned if she did and damned if she didn't

Answer 9

I would have suggested that was probably not the best way to handle the situation. But to engage in an argument about it right then was probably not the best idea either.

I would have waited to talk to her about it later when her children werent crying and she wasnt trying to drive.

smacking a child up side the head is not the right way for her to handle the situation. but If you know your friend and know that she is not one to abuse her child. Then try to talk to her about it again.

Answer 10

Yes it is. Read the child abuse and spanking laws for your state.

Answer 11

Definitely and obviously that was child abuse.  I would report her to the right authority.

Her 3 year old is definitely wrong to bit the 1.5 year old. But there is other ways and more effective ways to punish the 3 year old. She could have cause the 3 year old brain concussion or burst the ear drum.

This 'friend' of yours is not a person you could regard as a friend.  A friend won't kick you out of the car due to what you've said. And I think this 'friend' is SICK in someway.  If a person who can think straight:- 1) he/she won't react that way towards a child; and 2) he/she won't react that way towards a friend.

Answer 12

YES ITS ABUSE AND NO I WOULD NOT  

Answer 13

She is obviously abusing her child. I mean if she kicked you out for just suggesting then that shows a guilty conscience. There is a line between discipline and abuse, and I believe in corporal punishment but that is just too much. I think you should report her, and if you are feeling guilty or scared of reporting her, remember this is also the person who left you stranded. If she left a friend stranded imagine what she could do to her own kids, who she is with all day.

Answer 14

Yes slapping a 3 year old on the side of the head is child abuse.  If she hits him to much it could start causing brain damage.  I would have reacted some what the same way.  I just wouldn't have left you stranded though.  I would hope that it was more of an embarrassment anger rather than I want to continue my actions.  An anonymous tip to child services can straighten things up for her.  I would love for her to tell them that it is none of thier business!

Answer 15

she kicked you out, that says allot about her character.

Answer 16

I wouldn't be so quick to call it child abuse, but it was not an appropriate form of discipline.  

Answer 17

That's abusive. I believe in spanking when appropriate, but slapping a child in the head is wrong. She could hurt her child- physically or emotionally. The fact that she freaked out enough to actually leave you stranded tells me that she probably treats him the same- if not worse- at home. I would call Children's Services since she won't listen to you. You need to make sure her children are not in danger.

Answer 18

A three-year old! Yes, thats child abuse.

But I applaud you on standing up to her, its funny how we as humans seem to be most afraid of standing up to the people we are closest to, or our friends.

I see how she wants to teach her kids not to fight with each other, but they are very young and violance is not the way to do that.

Answer 19

yes that's child abuse and she knows it. It's so sad that people like her don't know how to discipline children so they resoprt to childish things like that. I mean that is something a 2 yr old does because they don't know how to deal with their frustration and anger. Anyone who thinks smacking a kid to teach them that  hurting another is wrong, is just plain ignorant.

I also would report her to CPS. If she is willing to wack her kid in the head in front of people, imagine what she does in the privacy of her own home.

Answer 20

My former stepfather used to smack me across the mouth, spank me, and backhand me across the face and mouth all the time.  The cops and CPS in Ohio which is where I live considered it discipline and closed the case.  They didn't view it as child abuse.

Answer 21

That is definitely child abuse.  Imagine what she does behind closed doors when no one is around.  Call child protective services ASAP.  Please know that once you call, your friendship is over.  Knowing this though shouldn't stop you from calling - this is not the type of person you want to associate with.  Those poor kids will thank you one day.  

Answer 22

I'll bet if you smacked her in the head she would have a very different opinion about 'her business'.

Friend or not, report her. You must think of the well being of the small child.

Answer 23

I would be concerned! First of all, there are some big clues here that point to child abuse. Why was she so defensive if she isn't guilty of something? What kind of person throws their "friend" out of their car?

I would have the same reaction as you, girlie. Your instincts are right on.