Is something wrong with my kids?

Question

ok , so here is the deal , i have twins and they are 9 years old , but they are so different from every 9 year old i ever met so far , they make my kids look like 4 or 5 years old , they are so innocent , they only think of games, coloring,cartoons,going to the park when i take them ,my kids would never talk back to me not even in their dreams !! They know their limits, and know that i am the boss and what i say goes without even arguing about it ! They have everything they need , they won't even argue about me not letting them go anywhere if i am not there ,so when they have an invite from a classmate for a birthday party sometimes they don't even bother to ask about going, I don't let my kids go out and walk around with friends, when a kid come and ask for them to go out and play if i am busy and can't be there , i don't let them go ! am i wrong? I just don't trust no one with my kids! and with everything i see around on tv , i really don't care when my mother say i should go easy

Answer 1

i think that your kids would be nice to meet but you are doing the right thing not leaving your kids be with some else be around you most of the time when you have the time

Answer 2

What are you talking about? Your obviously a wonderful mother. Just wait it will get much harder when they're in junior high and high school. They listen and are being kids. When you love your kids sooooo much sometimes your too protective. When they get older like 12-13 I would start letting them go somewhere with their friends CLOSE without you there or make sure another adult is there. Also they don't always need to have other friends there becuz they have eachother.

Answer 3

yeah

its good your kids act that way you have brought them up well.

make sure they socialise with others though because they will affect them when they are older if they don't. Maybe get theminto after scholl activities where you can be there watching them but they can socialise aswell. Your right trusting people is hard especiallly all those things you hear about but make sure that they go out there and see what the world is like because some day they will have to leave home and they need to know what it is like out there.

Answer 4

What exactly is your question?  Your children (according to everything you provided in this 'question') are perfect angels and you want to know if something is wrong?  Come on.  Don't be silly.

Are you wrong for not allowing your children to participate in activities if you aren't able to be there to supervise?  Again, don't be silly.  That's exactly what you SHOULD be doing, so no, its not wrong.  As long as you are allowing them to go to parties and activities when you are able to supervise (which should be MOST of the time), then there should be any major problems.

Answer 5

I am amazed that your girls don't even ask if they can go to birthday parties because they know you'll likely say no. I mean, having innocent well behaved kids is ONE THING but having silent submissive mutes is a whole other ball game.

They need to interact with other children. Even when they see other kids walking all over their parents and other kids- at least your kids will learn how to deal with those children. They will likely pick up *bad things* but you are the parent and you set the ultimate example. I kind of think your shielding them too much. I hate to say that.

Just let them get out more. There's more to life than living under your thumb.

I don't know ANY 9 year olds that have birthday parties unsupervised. Are you even sure that is the case?

Edit: Okay, I have a ten year old. I just talked to very recently about "s*x." This is what I said: "Honey, has anyone ever used the word "s*x" around you? What did they say?" she was vague and said some boys said it and everyone laughed. I then told her," I want to continue this discussion whenever you want to. But, first, I want you to know that when kids are talking about ANYTHING including s*x that you can and should come to me and talk to me about it. I want to give you the RIGHT information. I want you to know the truth about things.. not silly stuff from friends."

That is all I have said on that subject SO FAR. And she walked away happy that I trusted her enough to open up the lines of big girl talk.

That's ALL you have to do at age 9. Open up the communication lines. Let them know that you won't freak out over anything they want to talk about. That you will give them the TRUTH. Tell them likely anything kids say - is an exaggeration of truth.

Answer 6

i think thats just their personalitys, i dont think anythings wrong with them.  Ignore what everyone else said, they dont understand ur issue, so theyre being silly.  If u really feel strong about it though, talk to a peditrician or childrens counsler, im not saying ur kids should go to the doctor or a counsler, just u should talk to doctor or counsler about how they act and if its normal and how to other kids act and stuff.

Answer 7

Your kids sound fine, but won't be if they can't have friends and go to birthday parties.

The problem is the mother who is over-the-top

over-protective.

How will your kids ever learn to interact with others if they don't get to play with them?

And twins especially should have friends beside their sibling.

I think the fact that you asked the question here, you are questioning your actions.

Good luck.  And listen to your mother.  After all, you expect your kids to listen to their mother.

Answer 8

I think you need a happy medium.. the neighbor sounds like a terror.. I have an 8 yr old daughter and if she came walking down the stairs dressed like that I would flip the script....But I also think by  the way you are talking is that you might be sheltering too much.. You need to allow your kids stand on their own two feet (with your guidance of course) 9 is an age of curiousity... When your kids asked how Jamie Lynn got pregnant you should have been honest... learning it in school is not too far off and depending on what you said they might remember... Always be honest and should let them know the truth.. If you don't think they are ready to know say just that.... But there is def not anything wrong with them by any means.. I just think you need to cut the string a little loose and let them grow instead of staying in that dependent (i need my mom for everything stage) The more space you give them (in respectful terms) the more confidence they will build within themselves for when they get older

Answer 9

You sound exactly like my mom. Up to now (im 15) if i want to take the bus to school she walks with me till down the street and watches me get on, then i have to text her when i get off. If im going to the mall with my friends, she'll let me walk around by myself with them but she has to be in the mall. And if she calls and i dont answer she'll come looking for me. I have never been to the movies with my friends without her in the theater. And i went one time and went with my friend to the bathroom and she came out looking for me. The only time  a guy can come to my house is when were doing a project and i cant go to their house. Its okay to go to the mall and movies with guys as long as there are girls there too, and same rules applied of course. I was the same way, i never argued or anything, they'll start a little bit when they see their friends arguing with there parents, you dont have to go easy they are perfectly normal, you're just a little bit over protective, which is fine. They sound like me when i was normal. When they're older though (teens) you do need to go easier because then they'll get thoughts about lying to you to go somewhere with someone they're not alloud too. They might not do it, but just thinking about it isnt good.

Answer 10

I agree with the idea of finding a happy medium. Your kids are very well behaved, and you should be thankful for that. You've taught them to behave and act correctly, which you should be commended on.

But at the same time, you need to let your kids have some fun, hang out with friends and go to birthday parties like normal 9 year olds do.

You can find a happy medium, sit down with your kids and talk about rules and decide on ways they can be safe and have fun, for example, they can hang out with friends, but have to be home by sun set.

Sheltering your kids to much is dangerous, because when they finally do come into contact with things, they won't know how to deal with them. No matter what you do, your kids will be exposed to bad things, but you can make a difference in how they act.

The word doesn't have to be black and white, there is alot of ground in between choir girl and Jamie Lynn Spears.

Answer 11

It sounds like you are doing a great Job,congratulations! They are 9 and still children,you are treating them as such,and that is the way things should me. Goodness knows they aren't children for long.

Answer 12

get a life. kids r kids.