Is telling your child to fight back when someone hits them a assault by threat?

Question

A child that goes to my childrens school and rides their bus is bullying kids on the bus and my child decides to step in to protect the other children. That bullying child decides to slap my child leaving a hand print on her face. My child decides to draw a picture of the bully saying that if you look like this then you are a ugly person. Somehow one of the other children gave it to the bullys mother. The mother decides to get in my childrens face calling them names like "little black gangstars, monsters,etc. I get the call at work about this and come home and confront the lady stating that she has no business getting in my childrens face and yelling at them. I also told her to stay away from my children and that if her child continues to hit my children then they have my permission to beat her down. The mother called the police and I got a citation for making a threat. Now I have a warrant for assault by threat. That's basically telling me I can't protect my children.

Answer 1

No, it's not.  What you did was extend a courtesy to that child's mother, not threaten an assault.  You received a citation, and it's up to the local prosecuting attorney's office to decide whether to file charges.  From the scenario that you've given us, you did not violate any law that I know of, but I'm in California and I don't know where you are.  What you should do is contact the police and tell then you want to press charges against the child who struck your daughter for battery, and you should sit down with the principal to discuss what's going to be done about the bully who hit your daughter.  If the principal blows you off, contact the superintendant's office and demand an audience with someone in his/her office.  DO NOT LET THIS LIE.  If you allow them to ignore you, then they will.  They have an obligation to give you and your child a full hearing before they impose any discipline against your child.  If they continue to refuse, contact an attorney and file a claim with the city or county that runs the school district, and file a lawsuit if necessary.

What you told your daughter to do is not a threat, it was advising her to use self defense in an appropriate circumstance.  Children have the right to defend themselves and others just like adults do.  It sounds like the police officers in your jurisdiction are a little unclear on the law.  Oh, and even if charges are filed against you, if the facts are as you say they are, there is not a jury in the world that would convict you, so plead not guilty and fight it!

Good luck!

Answer 2

"I have every right to tell my kids to hit them back"

This is why kids go back with guns and shoot people, because parents like you tell them things like that.  It's like telling your kid "you've been bullied, so it's ok to go back and shoot them."  Do you get it?  Your child drawing the picture and saying they're ugly is not as bad as someone hitting your child.  That I don't get.  But when your kid is young, you don't tell them to fight back like that.  That's why there's so much violence.

Answer 3

So why didn't YOU call the school about this problem?  Why didn't YOU get the police involved FIRST?  The answer is YES if your child hits this other child your child CAN be charged with assault because YOU did nothing in the beginning to stop the bullying against YOUR child.

Answer 4

Depending on their age, if two kids get in a fight she you really can't get in to much trouble. Also if she wants to call the police on you , do it back.. Her child actually assaulted your child. That's worse then a threat.

I think you are right for not letting that little bully push your kid around.

Answer 5

HELLLLLL no.... i get torn on this?  On one side, it's wrong to tell your kids that violence is ok.  But on the other if you tell them not to defend themselves then that makes it ok for them to get picked on.  This day and age kids are mean especially when you get older!! I think kids need to defend themselves to let other kids know to leave them alone.  I can't believe you got a sitation  thats irritating!  Whew and to slap your child....thats were i'd tell mine to slap his a$$ back!    My son takes the bus too and there was one kid on there that kept teasing him and pushing him, and i told him the next time he lays a hand on him he best push him back hard and make his a$$ fall.  It's wrong i know, but sorry boys specially need to stand up for themselves so they don't get walked on in the future!!!

Answer 6

Society has lost all common sense.  I say you hire an attorney and find out what exactly your rights are.  Don't be bullied by the system into not being able to protect your children.  Also, see if a local TV station has any interest in airing your side of the story, the local media can have a lot of influence here.  I don't think you should play the race card at all, but it sounds like that other mother did.  Maybe you can gather evidence of mental instability and a history of her filing bogus charges etc.

And yes, the public schools are ridiculous, they are the thought police now.

Answer 7

you shouldn't have made a threat to her chilkd's safety, that just makes you as bad as them. Your best move would have been to call the police and tell them that she confronted your children like that. more violence won't end violence so it's silly to tell your child to beat her down. For all you know this mother and kid could have issues and end up doing something terrible. You should have just gone to the police from the start when your child was slapped. If you didn't know about it then, you should have at least gone to them once you found out and the mother had spoken to your child.

Answer 8

What threat?  There is no assault. Get a lawyer, the only assault here is by the bully and the bully's mother. By the way in order for it to be assault the victim has to be in fear of their safety. Hitting a person in and of itself is not assault.