Is the adoption process hard? New to this w. lots of questions.?

Question

My husband and I are beginning the talks of adoption. We have been trying to have a baby of our own but, we cannot. We are both finacially secure and have a decent size home. I know the process can be time comsuming but, are a lot of people denied?? Can adopting a newborn be part of our reality? How much does it cost?? Any personal experience will be helpful???? As I said, we are just starting out so we know nothing.......race, religion, or international adoptions does not matter

Answer 1

Yes, you can adopt a newborn.  In that case you would want to do a "domestic infant adoption" search the web for that term and you will find many, many agencies.  Most agencies have a information meeting that you can go to and they will be a good starting point.

Most importantly start reading books from the perspective of adoptees - and about attachment.

There are many yahoo groups about adoption as well, join one to get lots of helpful info.

Answer 2

The adoption process is easy here in America for foster children... harder (and FAR more expensive) if you want to adopt a domestic newborn... harder and far more expensive than that if you want to adopt internationally... and hardest and most expensive of all (bordering on snowball you-know-where chances) is adopting an international newborn. Read 'The Complete Adoption Book' and 'Achieving Success with Impossible Children' before you decide.

Answer 3

The adoption process isn't easy: it's very lengthy, time consuming, rather invasive at times, but it's all there for a purpose.  

There are different avenues for adoption, each with their benefits and drawbacks.  I don't believe there is a "best" method of adoption, because every family circumstance is different.  International adoption, foster adoption or domestic infant adoption all have unique challenges, pitfalls and rewards.  The best advice I can offer is to research everything, as fully as possible, while at the same time taking a good look at your family, then determining what is the best course of action.  

If you are financially stable (don't have to be wealthy, but you do need to be able to pay your bills), have a clean background and an essentially stable home enviornment, you will probably not be denied a homestudy approval (which you will need no matter which adoption option is chosen).

Cost is extremely variable.  Foster adoption is the least expensive, domestic infant adoption probably the most expensive.  International adoption programs have huge variations, so it really depends on the specific program in question.  

Start reading books, talking to adoptees, adoptive parents, adoption professionals. Get all the information you can and make an informed decision.

Good luck.

Answer 4

The adoption process is certainly not easy.  But it's a breeze compared to living with adoption.  In the same way that pregnancy and labor are not easy, but it's only the beginning of the work ahead of you as you try to be the best parent you can be.  Adoption has its own set of challenges.  Learn about adoption from ADOPTEES.  Learn about it from adoptive parents who have come to learn that all adopted children have trauma and struggles to overcome, and many have very serious wounds from their early years which will require a lot of healing.  As long as you learn the facts, and you still want to adopt, go for it.  Just know what it's really about first.  Don't rely on adoption agencies and social workers to teach you.  They have their own agenda.  Find out from the real people to live with it every day.

Answer 5

Love the first two answers.  Please keep in mind that pregnant women can be easily coerced into doing something they don't want to do (i.e. giving up their child), which can have lifelong repercussions for both the child and the mom.  Often, women who place their infants for adoption could parent their own children if they had just a little help to get back on their feet.  Also keep in mind that there are about 90 prospective adoptive parents for every ONE healthy infant.  There's a lot of competition for these hot commodities, and adoption agencies are raking in the dough.  Child traficking is alive and well under the guise of domestic infant adoption.  Sad but true.

However, there are over 100,000 children that really need homes already waiting in the foster care system.  And best of all, it's FREE!  You won't be supporting child traficking practices or coercion of first mothers if you adopt through foster care.  Please consider adopting a toddler instead (or even an older child).  (Although there are infants available for adoption through foster care, as well.)

I wish you the best of luck!