Is the biggest issue for anti feminists not being able to have their cake and eat it?

Question

They believe women should look after childcare, but on divorce, they want equal custody.

They believe women should stay at home and do the housework, then complain because they have to support the household.

They are upset when girls outperform boys in exams, yet they believe men should be real macho men, unconcerned by intellectual liberal values.

It seems that so many of the things anti feminists claim to want are in direct contradiction to the lifestyles they would prefer to have.

is the biggest issue for anti feminists not being able to have their cake and eat it?

Answer 1

Watch it where you are swinging that cake knife; you might poke some one's eye out..  When my ex and I divorced I raised our son the first 12yrs and he got him after that; per our agreement. I always beat my Biology partner in quizzes and tests. My husband doesn't complain about me being a housewife, nor does he complain about having to support the household.

You never heard me complain about my life, nor will you ever.  Now will you please take that piece of cake I'm feeling rather ill at the moment, too much sugar, way too much sugar.  

However, I award you a huge "E" for effort.

Oh yes, I have gained my ever famous TDs. I got a pretty good haul in your other question. You know I can always translate TD to mean "touch down."   And trust you me I am being sarcastic.

Answer 2

They believe women should look after childcare, but on divorce, they want equal custody.

- I do not. I believe if you wanna look after children you can be a man or a woman.

They believe women should stay at home and do the housework, then complain because they have to support the household.

- I do not think the complaining is because of supporting the household...its just coz the women are so tired from doing it...but they probably still wouldnt trade it for anything else...

They are upset when girls outperform boys in exams, yet they believe men should be real macho men, unconcerned by intellectual liberal values.

- upset when girls outperform boys? thats really silly...I'm actually happy for either s*x anymore that can actually do well considering that education can be pretty lax anymore. and frankly real " macho men" can sometimes be a turn off. I mean its nice once in a while...but all the time? Id wanna kick him!

It seems that so many of the things anti feminists claim to want are in direct contradiction to the lifestyles they would prefer to have.

- I say I am nonfeminist...but really i hate labels..because while i say i am nonfeminist..i know i do have some feminist beliefs...but...i like to think of it as being a walking contradiction

is the biggest issue for anti feminists not being able to have their cake and eat it?

- mmmm cake.

Answer 3

Twilight, you used to ask half-decent questions in this forum.  That's something I don't take for granted around here.  Today you're just pandering.  I look forward to seeing you return with your A game.

Since I've never been married, had children, or shacked up with a woman, your concerns about divorce, custody, childcare, and housework are irrelevant as far as I'm concerned.  I clean my house to the standard I'm satisfied with and that's all that matters.

I didn't get two degrees by finishing behind a bunch of girls on exams, so again, I don't get upset over that.

As for cake, I'll have it or eat it as I choose.  MGTOW is in full effect in my life.

Answer 4

The biggest issue for anti-feminists is that feminists had their cake and ate it too.

http://www.rulymob.com/

http://www.freewebs.com/feminism-evaluat...

http://www.ukmm.org.uk/issues/suppressio...

When you give phenomenal power, rights and freedoms with no responsibilities to women, as well as systematically dismantle men's rights and civil liberties and heap all the responsibility on men, people (both men and women) do have a problem with that.

Suppose I have promised good living conditions and social acceptance of AIDS-affected people. I give it to them too. Now they are happy as they're leading perfectly normal lives, and nobody bothers about their ailment.

But at the same time, I infect healthy people with AIDS.

What would you feminists (or any sane person) think of me? A sneaky, cruel and devilish b*st*rd?

You're justified in thinking so.

So why do the same feminists rise up in arms when anti-feminists think the same of feminism? Didn't feminism promise women equal rights? Didn't it give them just that, and so much more? Didn't it s***w men's rights and civil liberties at the same time?

The answer to all the above is yes.

Read the links I posted. The first is a free download of one of the most excellent books I've read. The second is simply a website that evaluates feminism, with proof and evidence of every single claim. How admissible the proof and evidence is depends on how open-minded you are to the truth.

The third is a story. Read it. I'm not going to give anything away.

Wake up feminists!

Answer 5

You're right.

No more or no less then Feminists "want it all" and espouse an agenda of self interest.

Is it really that difficult to grasp that divorce changes the social dynamic between families that makes equal custody necessary

Your overly simplifying complex issues then lumping together people with legitimate anti-feminist beliefs and trolls who espouse nonsense and treating like some great hypocrisy-- something I'm sure all of the feminist hate when its done to them

Answer 6

I am not really sure what your point is.  As far as I know, there is no monolithic group of 'anti-feminists' who have a set agenda for women.  I think that there are still some old-fashioned conservative people that think women should remain at home to take care of the children since they don't believe that paid caregivers can give a child the same love and attention as a parent, or there are some uneducated people who think men should rule the home and the wife obey everything they say.  But none of these people have the same agenda.  My mother stayed home with us and my father never complained about having to ''support the household", so I am not really sure there is a group out there with an agenda for all women.

Answer 7

There is certainly a lot of hypocrisy in the anti-feminist message in general. But as answers here indicate, not all antis espouse it.

Answer 8

I'm not sure I can speak for all anti-feminists, but here are my views on each of your comments:

"They believe women should look after childcare, but on divorce, they want equal custody"

I think women should have a choice between career and motherhood, but should not try to do both simultaneously as the children may suffer. When people divorce the children might well join the father in a new family, but unless the mother refuses to give up a career she is the more natural choice. I think the real issue here is when the mother tries to block or severely limit the father's access to the child.

"They believe women should stay at home and do the housework, then complain because they have to support the household".

I haven't seen anyone complain about this.

"They are upset when girls outperform boys in exams, yet they believe men should be real macho men, unconcerned by intellectual liberal values".

We are upset that boys are being disadvantaged by current trends in schooling, but if a man wants to go into a trade rather than take the academic path then why not? I don't see a contradiction.

"It seems that so many of the things anti feminists claim to want are in direct contradiction to the lifestyles they would prefer to have"

Really? I don't see this at all. Perhaps the real answer is that you are getting something out of creating spurious arguments?

"is the biggest issue for anti feminists not being able to have their cake and eat it?"

LOL!  That's pretty rich. I think you'll find that its the feminists who think women should 'have it all'.

Answer 9

No offense, but don't tell me what I believe.

The thing about any view point that is in direct opposition to a movement, is that the negative does not contain a consistent ethos - in other words people disagree with it for their own reasons.

I am an anti-feminist, and this is my standpoint in contrast to how you perceive us.

- I believe in equal entitlement to childcare and equal custody.

- I believe people should be themselves, not forced to conform to arbitrary gender standards. I think they should be subject to individual will or judgment without restriction; contingent solely upon one's discretion. I definitely believe men should be concerned with intellectual values, whether progressivist or not.

How exactly do you know what "lifestyles" we prefer to have?

Answer 10

Ah, you see, these anti-fems are bullies, not intellectuals!

Trust me, you could give them everything they want.... But they will still whinge about it all. It's not about the issues as you describe above - It's about bullying their ex-wives in any way they can.

Anti-fems are not concerned with actual issues! They are just adult bullies who blame women for everything.

So yeah, absolutely, not being able to have their cake and eat it too is a big issue for them, but there biggest issue is that they are eternal bullies, not intellectuals.

Answer 11

No, the biggest issue is the disparity between the way feminists view the world, and the way the world actually is. Feel free to misinterpret what I've written and twist it around to fit your agenda.  

Answer 12

Here on Y/A GWS, the "anti" lot seem to know more about feminism than feminists do and feminists have no grasp of what anti-feminism is about.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/73318...

http://www.freewebs.com/feminism-evaluat...

most "antis" would like equality.

Answer 13

You seem to be going on the belief that anti-fems are all male. If so, you're mistaken......

I personally believe that it's best if a child is cared for by a mother, rather than a stranger. (That's in the best case scenario of a couple staying together. )  That doesn't mean that I don't see the value of a father in a child's life, so if the parents separate, its not in the best interest of the child or father to be kept apart.  The main issue with the situation is that often children don't go to the parent who is the most fit, but to the one who is female.

I think the main issue about  financially supporting SAHM comes from the fact that many SAHM's aren't pulling their weight and fulfilling the duties that are included with this position.

As far as your last assertion, I have never heard a so called "macho" man object to being intellegent. The intellectual quality of liberal values is completely subjective.  lol

And then of course their are people who just dont know what the h*ll they are talking about and bltch just to bltch. lol  Maybe  those people are the people you're asking about.

Answer 14

Yes, I'm so tired of these people thinking we are such bad people since all we want is equality and fairness.  They say such mean things about us that aren't even true.  We such sweet women and all we ask for is equality and for this oppression to end.  We are so misunderstood, it's appalling.

We shouldn't be treated as slaves and I simply am tired of being oppressed by men everyday; every single day men oppress me.  I wish this madness would end for we are such lovely ladies.

All we want is to spread love throughout the world and it's so confounding that those who oppose our loving philosophy feel so terribly about us.  We are loving people and all we want to do is spread love.

Answer 15

Exactly what I've observed from the majority of them.

Answer 16

I think I'd like to buy you a drink, Twilight. This is my biggest irritation with the bizarre anti-feminist rhetoric.

Most of what they rant about (alimony, gold-digging etc.) are the antithesis of what feminism is about.

Cheers.

Answer 17

I think this can be said about many people on both sides of the argument.

Everyone wants all the rights, benefits and privileges but no one wants to put in the effort and no one wants the responsibility that comes with these things.

Answer 18

As a feminist, while I don't know understand anything about anti-feminists except that they post wacky things here, I know about cake and think you have hit the nail on the head in identifying a very important issue.

Even while supporting women's rights in every way possible, I really would like to have some cake and eat it. But my doctor says my triglycerides are too high, and I have to give up cake and exercise, and eat cashews instead.  So, I don't get to have cake and it really is a big issue for me.  I plan to exercise and diet a lot so I can have cake again.  I blame my doctor, but this is not a problem I have with women - my doctor is a man.  Not that I haven't had great doctors who were women, but they moved out of town or retired.

And wouldn't you know it, my wife can and does eat cake whenever she can have it, but I do not hold her sweet tooth against her and believe it is her right as a woman to all the cake she wants.  Her triglycerides are just fine.  In fact, if I remember, I think I will pick her up some cake on the way home - thanks for a great idea!

Answer 19

Exactly that, their real complaints are just bemoaning the fact that women are no longer in that SAHM/childminder role. So they cook up all these witless questions attempting to create imaginary dilemmas.

Just to clarify, I won't deny that some fathers have been short-changed in the courts, but these are not the pillocks who post stupid Q&A on here.

Answer 20

I'm sure it's the feminists fault some how...lol

eoghan: I've seen fathersforlife. It's pretty one sided and bias...I wouldn't use it as a reference. I actually contacted the guy to ask about some of their issues and he simply told me that all of my text books at school were a lie. That's laughable.

Answer 21

That's what I'm hearing from some of the more out-spoken anti-feminist men, to be honest.

It leaves me (and I'm sure some other women) in a state of confusion and frustration as to what exactly is expected of us and yet it appears that no matter what we do, some men are just not pleased.