Is there any way that my husband can adopt my son?

Question

His father has nothing to do with him. Has only seen him one time in his whole life. Never given me any money for him. Is not on the birth certificate. Is a convicted felon. He is currently incarcerated. He says he will sign the papers if we put in there that he doesnt have to pay child support, but he wants visitation and picture updates. I dont see how that is any different than if he were paying child support. It seems more like he wants all the fun with none of the responsibility. My husband has been there since before he was even born. Is there any way that I can do this without him being able to have visitation? Our money is short and we cannot afford a contested adoption. I know that louisiana law says that the adoption can proceed w/o his permission if he hasnt seen or had any contact or paid any money for 6 months, but that will still be a contested adoption. Please, serious answers only. Thank you.

Answer 1

Once the bio father signs the papers he has given up any and all rights to the child.  Financially speaking - that is going FORWARD, since your current husband would be accepting him as his own blood and would assume the role of provider.  If he owes you back child support and there was a court order for child support, then he would still owe that.  At least that was my situation.  My ex said he would sign if he didn't have to pay anymore and all back support was expunged.  Adoption released him of financial responsibility going forward, but we had to petition the court to have him released from the back child support (which I did at an additional cost to me since it was a modification to the divorce decree (1000.00- thanks Mom) and all he had to do then was sign the papers, but he had skipped town.  oh yeah, we were in Florida, so it may be different in LA.  Best of luck!!! I will be thinking of you and wishing you the besT!!!!!

Answer 2

The jerk off can't have visitation rights without paying child support. How selfish and ridiculous of him. However, if you can't afford a contested adoption and the jerk won't sign the papers, then I think you answered your own question. I'm sorry. I totally agree with the first answerer though. He may sign the papers.

Answer 3

Hey. I've posted stuff on the adoption YA before too and everyone is mean and bitter here. So, don't take it personally, its not just you!

Anyway. I would be furious with the bio father too if he wanted to see your son without making any child support payments. Unforutnately those are two seperate issues. I used to think that if they didn't pay, then they didn't get visitation, but that's not true. You can have one without the other. Is that right? No. But that's how it works.

You'll need to deside if you can handle the idea of giving your ex info about his son and pictures and updates as he's locked up and when he gets out if he can do visitation and stuff. Unless your ex signs the papers to turn over his rights to your husband, then he'll be able to contest it and it'll be a big mess.

It sounds like your ex is holding you emtionally hostage. He's saying, "Well, I'll give you what you want by signing the papers, but only if you give me what I want by getting updates and pics and stuff."

Your husband sounds like a wonderful, carring man. What a blessing he must be to you and your son.

Best of luck...

Answer 4

Sorry you didn't like my last answer but the fact is, your CHILD deserves to know the TRUTH too.

Children do have rights, you know.  Just because the truth might not be pretty does NOT mean that you can keep it from him.

You already said that his father is willing to give up custody, if you could still send him a picture or keep him updated.

I don't see how this is such a huge problem.  He's not asking for daily visits or to share custody, he just wants to know how his son is doing.  And your child deserves to have the same consideration.

Good or bad, the man IS HIS FATHER.

Answer 5

if he's not on the birth certificate, then there should be no problem

Answer 6

I believe that if he signs the adoption papers he is no longer considered a parent and therefor has no right to visitation. It's his own fault he was never there for your son. It sounds like your husband is his real father even though he wasn't conceived with him. I would suggest talking to the department of human services about what can be done. To talk with them is free and usually are the services they provide are. They could possibly help to make the only dad your sons know his legal dad!

Good Luck!

Answer 7

Hello =)  The only low cost way to do the "step-parent" adoption is if the biological father will sign the papers.  I don't know the law in your state, but I live in Michigan and my husband was able to adopt my 2 children from previous relationships.  For my son, his birth father signed the papers to give up his parental rights and then the court set a date for an adoption hearing - it was a fairly quick process, and very easy and low cost.  For my daughter, her father would not sign the papers, so I had to get a lawyer to prove that he was unfit and it was in my daughter's best interest to have his rights terminated.  This was very expensive, and a much longer and stressful process, but well worth it in the end.  In both cases the child support orders were canceled (I had never received any support anyway) and visitation was never brought up because once the parental rights are terminated there is no reason for court ordered visitation.  If your son's birth father still wants to see your child, that would be up to you, but the court will not order it.  And really, if he hasn't wanted anything to do with your child up to this point, why would he now?  It would be best to keep the lines of communication open, so that when your son is older he will have the option of getting to know his biological father if he chooses.  It's hard, I know.  I wish you the best of luck!

Answer 8

If he signs the papers, then he is giving up all right to the child. It's as simple as that, he CANNOT stipulate anything and he will be relieved of all financial obligation. All in all if he signs those papers, it will no longer be his child at all.

Answer 9

I only suggested that you consider your son's right to know his father.

Why does that make you so angry?