Is there something I'm not getting or should know, I'm stressed from trying to get an answer.?

Question

I asked a question but I didn't explain myself very well, I learnt some really good information though like about the nature (genetics) vs nurture (experiences) idea etc. I want to know how to "be yourself" and how to work out who you are, for instance I might want to be funny (is that my self wanting to be funny) now I may not know how to be funny because I haven't had many "experiences" or don't have the genetics based around being funny so I buy a book on how to be funny and get the same information/knowledge I get from having experiences on the topic, is that another way to develop your personality. I'm confused that if I want to have a certain aspect of my personality I have to have an experience or certain genetics to do so. I'm also confused as to how to be yourself, theres the whole argument on my other question on how your personality is shaped etc but I want to know for instance how to know what I want to be and act like because if it's from experiences then I need to have.

Answer 1

Well, I tried to find the answer to your question.

You can check out the link below and judge for

yourself. This is from a popular magazine .

Have a great day

Answer 2

Sounds to me like you should be focusing on how to accept yourself the way that you are!  So what if you're not "funny"...it's not a prerequisite for getting along with other people or being happy!  I'm willing to bet that you have an appreciation for people who have this gift.  So do I!  I'm not a comedian, but I sure do appreciate it when someone can get me to laugh!  It's really not as important what others think of you as it is how you see yourself.  It sounds to me like you need to work on liking yourself, and recognizing the qualities you do possess, and sharing those with others.   Just be yourself!

Answer 3

So.  Your questions are:

How is personality shaped?

Who are you if who you are is determined from genes and experiences?

Nature sets out the genes to be triggered, while nurture provides the environment to trigger such genes.

Genes will make people more likely to have a certain personality.  However, that is not just who they are; they are also influenced strongly by their environment, which consists of all their experiences.  

But experiences do include books.  It includes everything you perceive and encounter.  It is your entire environment.

Nature is what you are born with.  Nurture is your entire environment.  It isn't limited to one part of your environment; it's everything, even your thoughts.  So yes, that means a book would count as your environment.  You can perceive it, and it can influence you.  And it is a way to influence you, but not necessarily develop your personality.  

The whole idea of nature vs. nurture can be quite complex.  Everything plays together in a very intricate way.  There are tons of factors involved...  In the end, we're a mix of both.  

Our genes deal with how we respond to our environment.  

Here's an example.

Here, genes determine if you're bread or clay or stone or water.  In this example, let's say you're clay.

Now, for environment: we poke at this clay and leave an imprint on it; we affect it and the clay itself changes as a result.  We might not be poking at the clay strongly, but we still leave an imprint.

Things happen to people.  It affects people, and people change.  Such changes may be small, but they still occur.  

Now, you can shape people, you can shape clay... and so environment means a lot about who we are.  But our genes matter too.

Say if we were stone.  If we poked at this stone, it wouldn't change.  If we poked at it hard enough, say with a chisel, then maybe it would.

But what if we were bread? If we poked at this bread, the effect would be greater.

Again, our genes determine how we respond to the environment.  

So what is our personality?  Who are we?  We are the sum of it all, the leftover clay with all these imprints left upon us.   These imprints, the effects of our environment, are now a part of us, and influence  how we respond to our new environment as well.

Say we are water (genes).  We freeze this water (environment).  Now we are likely to respond to heat more (environment + genes).

And how do you know what you want to be?  Or what you want to act like?  Everything is how you respond to your environment, but in this case, your present environment consists of these questions, and you respond accordingly with what happened previously in prior environments and your genes.  

I suppose it's confusing, and admittedly, I'm not good at explaining.  If you need any further clarification, I'll do my best to help you.  But I do hope this makes sense.

Answer 4

Wow....lots of conflicts here. We develop as we go...every day experiences not those earth shattering ones shape us and make us who we are. We have to live in order to grow. So live....take adventurous vacations, find opportunities to talk with interesting people, broaden your horizons, go to museums, take different classes....art, writing, cooking, languages, play an instrument, get a part in a local play. Nothing we learn or do is lost. It becomes a part of us. Something will click...  You are trying too hard and thinking too much. Just let life be and suddenly you know the right path to take. No one is made up of just one aspect  . We have many dimensions. We change as we grow and we grow as we change. Let loose and enjoy...you will find you.