Is this a valuable lesson for female college undergrads?

Question

“I keep telling these women in college, ‘You need to plan having a baby like you plan your career if it’s something that you want. Because we haven’t been told that, this generation. And they’re shocked when I say that. I’m supposed to be like this feminist telling them, ‘Go achieve, go achieve.’ And I’m sitting there saying, ‘For me, having a baby has been the most transformational experience of my life.’” - Rebecca Walker

Sure, it's important to plan for motherhood in advance, if that's what you're into. But she's saying this to women between the ages of 17 and 22, most of whom (the ones who are sexually active) are doing everything in their power to put off pregnancy. Is this what they need to hear now?

Answer 1

Planning to have a baby includes planning not to have a baby  before you're ready. A family is a huge part of your life and I think it does require some plans to be successful. Maybe people are unrealistic when they think of how much things cost, how much time they will spend working and how much support they will have. By telling a 17 year old to have a plan you're not encouraging her to go ahead and get knocked up, but maybe she'll rethink her career path as a travelling circus preformer if she knows she wants 5 kids some day.

Answer 2

Since she said "If it's something that you want," I think it is a valuable lesson. But not everyone wants a child.

If you want a kid, you should consider a career that will be able to support one.

Answer 3

Yes. She is right. You are just naive Rio. A woman in the age of 22 should have at least 3 kids. Or you are going to wait till you are 40?

Answer 4

Perhaps men and women should both be told this. It's kind of sad that people aren't bright enough to think this stuff through themselves though.

Edit



Of course it's daft to have kids before you're ready, and considering that younger couples often end up divorcing it's a bit silly to be encouraging very young women to have kids. But a bit of thinking and planning wouldn't hurt.

Answer 5

I do not think she is saying that at all.  I think she is saying that your future children are just as important as your careers (hopefully you feel they are more so once you have them) and that planning for them by being healthy physically, mentally, emotionally and financially is just as important as going to college.  Even if these women don't want children, who wouldn't support women's health?

EDIT- That is why I said FUTURE children.  Children are healthier when the mother's themselves are healthy and it is easier to be healthy when you are healthy years before you have a child rather than decide you want to be healthy when you get pregnant.

Answer 6

I agree with her, too many people have unplanned pregnancies and the most sucessful people I know are ones who actually planned their children's birth.

Answer 7

Wow.. thats good advice.

This reminds me how much I really really really LOVE being a man!!

Answer 8

A child should really be planned for best results.  Failing at a poor career choice has much less social impact than failing at being a mom.  

If children are born healthier to women in their mid 30's, then why was my friend's wife who got pregnant at 36 consider "high risk" due to age?

It is better healthwise for the baby and mother to give birth in her 20's.  One example of age issues is ectopic pregnancy which is a higher risk with advancing age.

Also, risk of Down's syndrome increases with maternal age.  1 in 1530 at age 20 to 1 in 30 at age 44.

Answer 9

What I find interesting is the feminist who puts off having her baby until she is 40 and then finds she is infertile...you can't plan everything in life...young women are most able to have a baby, that is how nature intended...yes I would say if you are going to have a baby then get at it...

Answer 10

If you *want* children, you do kind of have to plan when you'll have them along with planning your career, or you'll suddenly be forced to take time out when you can't afford too. So if you actually want kids and career, you have to plan the two together.

Although planning anything is life is usually an exercise in pointlessness...

Answer 11

I think the older you are, the more suited you are to be a parent. It's just about life experience and being secure in both your career and who you are.

And I think it's a good idea to tell young women to put off and plan pregnancy. Having a child when you aren't equipped for raising it limits the mother and the child.

Answer 12

No. I think young women who want children should be made aware of the fact that it MIGHT be harder for them to get pregnant if they wait until their mid 30s or older, but I know for a fact that women either want children or they don't. No one should ever be "talked" or "cajoled" into making a choice one way or another. It's IMPERATIVE that young women today get some sort of training that will enable them to support themselves.

Answer 13

It's a good idea to plan this.  That way maybe you can sock away some money if you want to stay home and raise your child.  I think it's sound advice.

Answer 14

I agree with her, she is not saying they should plan to get pregnant now... She is saying that, if children are desired, women need to incorporate this transition into their future, and plan for it, so it happens when when they're ready and to try to make sure it does not anytime before they are.  

She is advising this as a mother, knowing the sacrifices of motherhood... it takes top priority! She is trying to prevent girls from having to experience it unplanned, because it would most likely interfere with or prevent them from first achieving any personal or professional goals; once the baby comes, all other priorities are placed on the back burner while goals are refocused on the child!

Answer 15

I think it's a great lesson. You said that these women are doing everything in their power to prevent a pregnancy. So what if it happens? They're unprepared. Maybe it's her way of letting them know that, although it may not be something you want to do now, when it happens, it will rock your world. So be sure to be as prepared as you can for it.

Answer 16

I 100% agree with this sentiment. It is important to plan having children, just as much as your profession. Raising children should be viewed in higher light with more importance put on it I feel. Sure anyone can raise a kid, but it takes planning and attention to raise a good kid.

Bottom line, we need more good kids, and in turn good adults... imo

also, at 35 your percentage for having a child with down syndrome drastically increases... so waiting too long will cost you also.

Answer 17

Women should be emotionally ready to have children and have the maturity and finances to be able to look after them.  Between 17 and 22 is too young for that advice as they're just starting out in life.

Answer 18

Ladies you are going to hate my answer. So brace yourselves. Women should have their children before pursuing their Careers. Why? Children are healthier when born to younger Mothers and they live longer. After babies are raised Women recover faster from child birth when younger. And can pursue an Education and a Career.

Nature does not care about your Politics. Biology trumps PC nonsense every time. We have Doctors cleaning up with Fertility Treatments for Women desperate to have a Baby. Who could have conceived when they were younger. And postponed Child Birth until they were ready. Nature didn't care about their time table.

Believe the nonsense your Feminist Leaders tell you. And many of you will end up with adopted Children or none at all.