Is this appropriate behavior for a married man?

Question

A married man and woman who work together spend months flirting a lot – there’s a lot of staring (even in front of both spouses), smiling, getting embarrassed in front of each other, comments, touching,etc. The woman gets pregnant, and so does the guy’s wife. The flirting has not stopped with either pregnancy.

He occasionally stops her to ask how she’s doing with the pregnancy, share his experiences (he already has another child), etc. One day, she’s walking by his office and he stops her again – then he asks if she’s been “getting emotional” and starts to complain about his wife; how he gets yelled at for giving suggestions and trying to help, then again when he’s silent, so he can’t win… He then says “You’re always so together; I’ve never seen you lose your temper, are you like that at home too?” and she tells him that she’s just been crying a lot, but she doesn’t get like that… He then says “I’ve told her (wife), “Woman’s name” isn’t like this at all!”, to which his wife replied “I’ll bet she yells at her husband too…”. The man again stresses how “even-keeled” and calm and collected the woman is, and praises her for it.

The woman asks how he feels about getting yelled at – does he handle it or get upset?? He says he does both, but sometimes he does get upset… She shares that her husband does the same too, even when she’s just crying…

What is the man trying to do?

Answer 1

I think it's disrepectful especially in front of there other spouses, please think about how you would feel if your spouse was doing the same thing your doing

Answer 2

Understand women.

Answer 3

you're.... i mean, "the man" is doing alot of things wrong.  1st, flirting with anyone other than your wife is just wrong.  2nd, comparing your wife to another woman will put you nowhere but a baaaad situation.  getting upset at a pregnant woman who complains is just pointless.  

don't just love your wife, RESPECT her.  

Answer 4

If you work there too, how do you know so much about what is going on between these two?   Maybe you should mind your own business and do your work.  

Both of these people are playing with fire.  Stay out of it, or you could get burned, too.

Answer 5

Passing the time...what it sounds like to me.

Don't look into it so much...the guy is just being friendly.

Answer 6

Be a good person and friend. That is it.

Answer 7

He's making a long-term investment. He hopes his behavior pays off with a sexual relationship down the road.

Answer 8

he is commiserating. mind your business.

Answer 9

He's trying to get some action...on the side, from you.

Answer 10

nope it isnt

that sounds like emotional cheating

plus it sounds like you are young and stupid  

Answer 11

He's trying to be a friend and also to get another perspective on what he's experiencing.  Don't read more into it.  

Answer 12

drive everyone insane!!!  

Answer 13

What a scumbag.  

Answer 14

I'd say he's attracted to the other woman but happy in his marriage too.  This pregnancy is a stress on his marriage and he isn't sure how to deal with it.  I think mainly he's just trying to figure out how to deal with his hormonal wife.  It's really stressful and he's talking to someone else who's in the same situation to see how they're dealing with it.  Classic male problem solver behavior.    

Answer 15

I don't know la la la la la la la la totally

Answer 16

trying to have a friend who knows what he is going through and can understand

Answer 17

pregnancy is a mysterious thing it causes the woman's emotions to go haywire and i guess if your body was changing daily as theirs does then you would be moody too, just grin and bare it don't take all things to heart it will be forgot after the delivery because then there is other things to occupy the mind that is going on, as for the closeness between the two co-workers well that is a very fine line as long as it doesn't get crossed it will be fine

Answer 18

Sounds like he is just trying to compare his wife with another pregnant woman to see if they all act alike,,,  

Answer 19

He's trying to get some!  

Answer 20

cheat on his wife is what he trying to do.

Answer 21

He's trying to get both those brawds to shut the h**l up so he can do his job and not gossip like a little school girl. He sounds like a chump to me. Oh, and he'd cheat on his wife in a heartbeat, if he had the balls to make a move. Which he doesn't.  

Answer 22

Sounds like best friends to me..

When you are a grown-up you flirt just for time pass..

All friends do..

If you ask either of them they probably take each other as good friends they share their feelings with.

I dont think there is a problem with that.

Answer 23

He a Player! He gets off having those women on the hook.The jerk must have a BIG ego.

FYI watch him close you're about to see New Meat enter the picture.

Answer 24

Get some!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 25

The flirting was already way out of bounds -- and that happened before either pregnancy!

Flirting is sexual, touching even more so. These two should have stopped a LONG time ago. They definitely should stop now!

Making members of the opposite s*x a confidante is a form of infidelity. Even without physical contact, it can be devastating to a marriage. (Google "emotional affair".)

That this man is also in a superior position at work smacks of a kind of sexual harassment even if the woman is clueless.  

Answer 26

I dont know, it doesnt sound like hes doing anything wrong. Maybe the fliriting before, but as far as all the pregnancy stuff sounds like hes just trying to be a nice guy.