Is this appropriate beheivour?

Question

At school I had a counselor I would talk to once a week. At the end of the year, she said that I can call her anytime in the summer, and promised I can see her. 1st week of summer I call, and we talk for 10 minutes (she wanted to end the conversation.) and said she'll be gone for 1 week. Something traumatic happened to me so I called 1 week later and left a message. 3 days later I tried calling again. Finally another week later, i call and she answers. I was sobbing on the phone, and she agreed to see me on friday. Friday 30 minutes before she's suppose to pick me up, she randomly cancels. I call her 4 days later, and I was sobbing because I was going through a lot. Than she said she had to go and hung up. Should I forget about her and find an actual therapist to help me?

Answer 1

i think she really wanted to be available for you but could not follow through on her promise, she really should only make herself available during school. I think that's a good decision to find yourself a therapist out in the community away from school, you don't have to let anyone even the school counselor know you are seeing anyone else, it's sometimes good to keep your business to yourself. Just thank her for her help when you see her and say it's all taken care of now. But do follow up with your decision to find a therapist, good luck.

Answer 2

Talk to her first about how you feel abandoned.  Get a therapist if you need immediate help, but otherwise give the one you know a chance to make it up to you.

Answer 3

Wow.  This is not appropiate behavior.  She should not keep ignoring or abandoning you.  She is completely inappropiate.

I would try and get another therapist that you can count on.  Then I would write a letter to the principal documenting what occurred with the school counselor.

Answer 4

Find another one. She aint good.

Shes supposed to help and she isnt enless she had a very good reason for leaving.

Answer 5

Tough situation with no easy answer.  You were not prepared for the separation of summer vacation.  You may also be finding out how much the counselor meant to you, MAYBE more than you meant to her.  You need to talk with HER how you feel losing touch with her and how much you missed your weekly interviews. You might tell her too that it was pretty unprofessional of her not to recognize and deal with your dependence on her, that she needs to be more considerate of her pupils, and to spend some time preparing them for separations.  You have suffered a loss of someone dear to you.  Give yourself a chance to grieve over it.  Don't be afraid to let her know you are angry about what has happened.  You might find that you can forgive your counselor her mistakes and that you can continue a new and more balanced relationship in the future.  I suspect you are finding out you can survive on your own and that this will make you a stronger and more independent person.  Tough way to learn.  Hang in and don't just drop this important relationship without telling her how you feel and how it affected you.  You may find out about some troubles she had which kept her from doing what she wanted with you so keep an open mind.  DO TALK AND  FIND OUT!  

If you do what some of these others have said about ending the relationship, then you'd better take a hard look at your own slush fund of anger and hostility.  You can find out more about youself in a book,  "Games People Play".  Look at the game called "Gee , You're Wonderful Dr. Murgatroyd".  Any relationship you blow off that easily makes your profession of attachment to her untrue.  This is a very critical event in your life.  Don't blow it.

Answer 6

I would first talk to her on how you feel about her doing this. if that does not got well I would def. try to go find someone who will be there for you most of the time.

Answer 7

She is behaving selfish and completely immoral.Find a therapist that is actually willing to help you.Many school counselors are burned up from counseling so many unstable students and/or they are simply insufficiently educated to help you.

Find a private counselor.