Is this child abuse/neglect?

Question

My boyfriend's sister has a child who is almost 4 and has severe learning delays (which I'm pretty sure is due to fetal alcohol syndrome, because she is pregnant now and is drinking) and my bf's sister gets REALLY frustrated really easily and grabs her daughter by her shoulders and screams right in her face and then puts her in her bedroom. For hours. She puts her to bed at 5:30 or 6:00 pm, sometimes if she is lucky it's 6:30pm. She puts her to bed early so she and her boyfriend can drink, and if her kid wakes up and gets out of the room, she gets screamed at and put back in the bedroom. Her daughter screams and cries and bangs on the door and cries herself to sleep on the floor right by the door. Basically she's nice to her kid when she feels like it. It's ridiculous. My boyfriend usually has to wake up in the middle of the night to take care of the kid when she cries because his sister is too drunk. My boyfriend just blows it off like it's nothing. It makes me so angry...not normal?

Answer 1

Oh my gosh.   I have the sickest feeling in my stomach after reading this.  That poor little girl....crying at the door until she falls asleep from exhaustion.  It makes me so, so sad.  Of course this is abuse.  Horribley neglectful.  Please, please make that call.  And I would think twice about your boyfriend.  It worries me that he dismisses this behavior.  What will he be like to your future children if you choose to have any???

Answer 2

why havent you phoned child protective services already? at least to make her stop drinking. you could be charged with criminal negligence

Answer 3

This is both child abuse and neglect. The child is probably going through much mental anguish.

Answer 4

That is abuse no doubt about it. Please call and help that child! I would not stay with a boyfriend who thought nothing of it, that is sad, it is his niece for gods sake.

Answer 5

aww another one of those parents...

i wonder why people cannot just use protection if they are going to be horrible parents!  

yes, it sounds like neglect and sadly calling CPS doesn't always put the child in a loving home.  not all foster parents are good.

Answer 6

not normal at all!!! You really should call somebody because that poor kid did not ask to be brought into this world so why should she have to suffer because her moms a drunk??? make the call you will feel like you helped somebody.

Answer 7

All of that would be a great reason to call CPS and help the little girl before it gets much worse.

Answer 8

awww so sad poor lil girl

i friggin hate people like taht. i wish they couldnt have babies. ******* losers

Answer 9

That's just sick. That is extremely abusive. I'd be careful to make that child feel very happy and secure. Otherwise, she will become a troubled adult.

Answer 10

i am just curious where is the little girls dad?  this is really wrong.  I don't understand how someone can treat there child like that.  Now that it is summer i let my kids stay up until dark because I don't think it is fair for them to go to bed when it is still light out and can see all the kids playing and having fun outside.  It is wrong to put that little girl in her room for the mothers own selfish reasons.  You definetly need to call CPS.  You probably are going to need to call them more than once.  I knew a case of abuse and I had to call many times before anything happened.  Just don't give up and even if they sound like they are getting irritated with you calling all the time keep doing it.  that little girl needs someones help.  I didn't give up and something was finally done about the abuse case I called about.  I hope this helps and good luck.

Answer 11

gotta agree with everyone. Def. abuse. No four year old deserves to be treated that way. I would report them to CPS. That can be a process, so if you feel that she is in real danger, call the local police, and let them in on it as well. Child abuse is not taken lightly. If you ever see any bruises on the little girl (that are not normal bumps and bruises), def. call the police. I hope everything goes well for you.

Oh, and please don't be afraid to report it. They have to keep the identity the person making the report confidential. I've been through the whole process of filing a report with CPS.

Answer 12

yes, this is everything, neglect, abuse and if something is not done then this child will have long term problems in the future.

Where are the grandparents someone needs to step in and help her raise her children or remove them.

Answer 13

That abusing your child. The best thing you can do is Call Children services on them. Because they abusing that girl and they shouldn't be drinking has well.

Answer 14

ughh not normal at all!

Answer 15

YES!! You should call and report them. You don't have to give your name if you don't want them to know it was you but if your gut tells you it's not right make a call now not later. You will never be able to live with yourself if something worse happens and you did nothing. As for your boyfriend I would think really hard about whether this is the kind of guy you want to raise kids with someday if you are thinking about staying with him they have both been raised to think this is OK behaviour. Very sad Best of luck.

Answer 16

you should report it. that poor child deserves a loving family and a better life.

Answer 17

Uh no, not normal. Call protective services. If these people are that cruel when you're around, imagine what they're doing when you're not around......

Answer 18

YES! CALL CPS right away.  We are all mandated reporters.  If you say nothing, it can comeback to you and will end up in court testifiying on what you saw and what you didn't do for the child to help her out.  

This situation is not normal!  Please make the call and you don't even have to leave your name.  Tell them everything you see her doing.  The best thing is for that child can be in a loving family environment.  She will also need to be in an early intervention program so she can live a normal live as much as possible.  Please help this child survive.  Make the call today ASAP.  

YOU'RE THE CHILDS ANGEL...SAVER HER...

Answer 19

Sounds abusive to me.  Sheesh I would immediately call CPS.

Answer 20

yeah thats def not right, child services should know about constantly drunk mothers. esp if theyre pregnant with another one

Answer 21

RUN, don't walk, to your phone and dial the number for Child Protective Services (CPS) in your area.  Please.  Do it for that sweet baby girl who NOBODY else is looking out for.  You can remain anonymous.  Please do it.  Good luck.

Answer 22

this is NOT normal situation, but YOU are normal to be angry about it... if your boyfriend is not upset, beware... you don't want him treating your children like that in the future... you need to call in social workers... this child is in need of a safe, protective, loving environment... plus the unborn child is in danger too... these kids need someone to speak for them... and it's going to have to be YOU!

Answer 23

This is so not normal. I know it might be hard to call DCF on her, or whatever the child department agency is in your state, because  it is your bf's sister, but please think about the safety of the daughter and her future unborn child. No child should have to be in a situation like that. They deserve love and affection when they want it, not when the parent wants to give it to them.

Answer 24

that poor child is being abused.

i would call and have the child put in foster care.

and the parents should go to classes or programs to help with their alchohal issues.

then they can have their child back once they are in shape you love and care for a child.

best of luck.

Answer 25

It sounds like abuse!

And because you're bothered by it, you're posting here.  You need to do something about it.  Report it.

The mother is not nurturing her child.  Her brother, your boyfriend, is letting this go on, so he's just as guilty.  

What if you get pregnant, and split up, and then YOUR child has to spend weekends in that environment? ...