Is this going to be easy?

Question

i am getting married in july and i have a five year old daughter from a past relationship.

i have been told that we can change her surname. but still that means that my husband to be still wont legaly be her gardian.

so we have been told that for him to be that we need to both adopt her. sounds weird adopting my own daughter but they say thats the prosess

how easy is this going to be? and how much do you think it mite cost

she has only ever seen her natural father once and he wants nothing to do. we live in the midlands england.

Answer 1

wow sounds strange to me.  Here in the states in order for a step parent to adopt the rights of the biological parent has to be terminated in court first then they can proceed with him adopting her.  There would be no reason for you to adopt since you are already her biological parent.  I would check with one of the local adoption agencies to get clarification.  One document I found on line shows agencies helping to prepare documentations for step parent adoptions.

Answer 2

I would suggest contacting an attorney (I think in England they may be called solicitors?).  I am sure the rules in your country are very different than here in the states so I hesitate to answer.  However, I would think that since he will be her step-father, he would have some guardianship rights over her.  Here in the US, you would need to get the bio-father's rights terminated before an adoption can take place, and I know many families that have step-parents that have not done that, but the step-parent does have guardianship rights over the child.  Again, though, it may be different in the UK.  

Good Luck and Congrats on your wedding!

Answer 3

I would say don't bother with it.  I hate to sound awful but marriages don't tend to last.  Why go through all the trouble? You're going to be living in one household right?  So he's going to be her father.

Answer 4

In order for her to be official, your hubby-to-be will have to adopt her to obtain his last name.  You will also have to change it on her birth certificate, and any other official papers that you may have.  But, also, I am not sure, that her natural father might have to relinquish all rights to him, in order for this name change to happen.  So it could get a little more stressing than what you think.

Good luck!

Answer 5

I adopted my step daughter and there was no adoption for my husband I think that someone has misadvised you.  If the father will sign off of his parental rights it shouldnt cost all that much.  My adoption cost about $180. but her mom signed off.  Now if they go back and try to reverse the adoption it will cost you some money.  A word of advice, dont let anyone involved in the adoption be a witness to any paperwork.  It can be a glitch.  I adopted my daughter 8 years ago and love her as much as my biological children.  Giving her a united family unit is such a blessing to children.  Im sure your laws are different there than they are here in the states.

Answer 6

going thru this myself, if both of you dont adopt her you will be giving your husband all rights and you will have none. my ex had to sign away all rights to our son before his stepdad could even try to start the adoption. it is taking forever because our lawyer is a friend that is doing it for free because he hates dead beat dads.

Answer 7

In the US we have something called a stepparent adoption, you would need to find out if there is something similar in the UK.