Is this islamically acceptable?

Question

I'm a 21 year old muslimah studying my degree abroad from my parents. I have found a suitable spouse to get married to but the problem is he's studying his degree too, we're both apart from our families.

Would it be islamically acceptable if we got our parent's blessings to get married by telephone or internet and then go to an Imam to get married? If our parents agree?

We want to help each other out in our religion and studies and look after each other forever.

Can we do this if our parents agree to it even though theyre not in the same country as us? But if they give us their blessings on the phone, and we go to an Imam or do they have to be witness at our wedding?

I want to do whatever is best in Islam because I fear Allah SWT

Answer 1

I'm afraid i'm not a muslim, but have studied Islam for two years now.

as far as education has told me, the only two people that need to be present at the wedding are your spouse and some one on your behalf.

therefore if you and him are there, along with an imam to officiate, i'm sure your parents blessings via the phone would be perfectly acceptable.

Answer 2

You should Love God more than fear him.

Peace!

Answer 3

Assalamu Alaikum, Sister in Islam

A Muslim marriage is always performed with the presence of at least one Wali (protector) with the bride.  He can be a parent, uncle or brother ( an immediate family member)  to verify whom she is being married and allows Imam to proceed with the marriage.  Imam knows his responsibility.

Without the presence of a family member of girl, a knowledgeable Imam will not proceed with marriage.  This is Islamic law in all four Schools of thought of Islam.

Most Imams and scholars would not agree with the Nikah on phone because Imam can see you but not  your groom. You both can't see each other and neither your witnesses can see both bride and groom  to testify and sign on Nikah papers that you married to so and so. Testifying your marriage without seeing both bride and groom will be an invalid and illegal marriage.

Ask Imam if he agrees on permorming Nikah on MSN Messenger, in which both girl and boy can see each other if both sides computers have web cameras attached and both bride and groom  can testify for each other being the right peson and witnesses can also testify that bride recognized the groom in their presence before marriage can be performed.  Both sides will need to have witnesses with them to testify that they witnessed was performed in their presence.  All these rules are written to protect the best interests of bride so no third person is there on the other side and he can't be seen.  What if on the other side is not whom you want to marry and is some one else  to get the visa of your country to enter in your country of residence specially if you are in USA or Europe and Canada.  All kinds of frauds can happen for visa. It will have to done in two process.  First all recognize each other on web camera and you and your witnesses sign all papers in presence of Imam. Then these papers have to be sent to groom by express mail or fax  and then on the same papes on which you and your witnesses have already signed,   your groom and his witnesses will also signed to testify as witnesses in the second sitting to make it  valid and kosher marriage  making sure that no illegal activitiey did  happen on every side. I have come to know that some people have done marriage like this.    This is too complicated but meets the legal requirements if Imam agrees.  Best would be that you both are present in front of Nikah with your one family member also present.  Groom has to make a trip for marriage and then can go back.

If you have to study more,  make sure you don't consumate marriage untill you start living together.   Once a bride and groom sleep together once or even few times,  it becomes extremely difficult  for either one to concentrate on their

education.  I married my one daughter and one son taking them to Pakistan where their spouses were and did Nikah only without allowing them to be together.  When their spouses got their visa after completing education and came here, then we did reception  and  allowed brides and grooms to live together.

You have to decide what Mehr (Dowry)  the groom agrees to pay you before he consumate the marriage with you  when you meet each other.  That must be written in your Nikah Certificate.  You can have him agree and get written  what ever else you want.  If  for example you are living in USA,  you should first have him agree that  he if ever divorces you,   should divorce you only in USA  by the laws of USA.  This contract will protects lots of your rights.  Without this agreement in Nikah record, he can take you to his country and divorce you  without no rights for you what so ever.  You will be traped in his country for example Pakistan or any Arab country  with no money and return ticket in your possession.   I have seen and heard many Pakistanis did  this to their wives who were citizens of USA. when their marriage did not work out.  

I am sorry that I am warning you about divorce before your marriage.  I am doing to protect your best interest  because you are Muslimah even though  I don't even know you.

May Allah protect you and keep you on the right path of Islam all your life as Muslimah.  Wassalam,  AM

Answer 4

I do urge you to speak to the Ulemaa about this matter. Talk to the Imaam about the situation. The Imaam will probably ask to speak to your father to ensure his consent (as some people happen to lie and say the Walee agrees when he doesnt).

So if you parents have agreed then alhamdulillaah. Speak to the Imaam and explain the situation to him. If the walee is not able to be present then the Imaam will instruct you as what course of action to take.

Answer 5

Yeah that should be fine

Answer 6

its' a serious question.  so i suggest you ask a scholar to explain to you different views, or his view... and then you guys should pray istekhara and talk to other muslims and then make the decision.

the reason i'm saying this is cuz, this became very prevalent in some yrs b4... but due to many many bad cases.. there are scholars who say this should not be done.  And "we" in yahoo answers are just general Muslim and don't have the proper knowledge of these things.. eventhough we might have much to say.

so i strongly suggest you speak with those who have correct knowledge inshallah.

wa aleikis salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh

Answer 7

That's so sweet :)

Hope things work out for ya both InshaAllah

Answer 8

well the answr to that question really depends on what sect of islam you follow. some scholars believe for a girl to be married first time it needs walee's permission, i am not sure whether its physical presence or could be his approval from far away. me and my husband got married wihtout either one of our parents being there. and we got married in a mosques by an imaam. but we did ask another imam form a different mosques he denied to get us married without my walee being there. you shoudl just call up an imaam of your own sect and find out with him. most likely the imam can speak to your parents and have them on the phone while the nikah is happening. May Allah save us all from the evil and guide us on the right path. ameen

Answer 9

You don't need your parents to be there for you to wed Islamically. You need witnesses. Therefore, if your parents agree, as they should give their permission for you to wed, then you can marry (Nikkah) via telephone, internet etc.

Answer 10

lol

Answer 11

I wouldn't like it if it was my daughter or son.

Answer 12

good ..May Allah Bless you with wonderful marital life..yes it would be good if you asked and got permission from your parents

Answer 13

ur obviously poking fun at Islam. Yet another lover of the BMP