Is this just something that happens in a relationship over time or should I let him go?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together now for 3 years. He doesn't initiate dates anymore, it's always me initiating the dates. He rarely kisses me. Sometimes he ignores my phone calls. I've talked to him about some of these things, but he hasn't shown me enough effort to change.

Answer 1

You need to remind him that a relationship is a two way street...he needs to appreciate you for what you are...his girl. Sometimes we men need to be told that we take you for granted...we forget and we get caught up in our world and we don't treat our women as well as we should...Sit that man down and remind him how important you are in his life...he will appreciate that.

Answer 2

yes,it happens with time.me and my husband have that too sometimes,its just we spent so much time together,but than we love each other and we try to spice things up all the time,hold hands in public,kiss,make out when we are alone.those kinda things.try doing that..

Answer 3

you cant change someone if their not willing. i dont think i would be initiating any anymore. let him do it. if he doesnt, then u my sweet dear, have ur answer.  

Answer 4

This appears to be very one sided relationship, and I have to ask myself why would you even call this a relationship?  The purpose of dating to find someone compatibly, someone that wants to spend time with you as much as you want to spend time with them.  So my advise to you is find someone new.  Good luck.

Answer 5

he either isn't interested because he's moved on physically or he's moved on emotionally.  you need to find out which one and deal with it.

Answer 6

Most women cherish their long-term relationships. Men, I don't think so.

I suppose you could ask him straight up if he still wants you to be together, otherwise, time to move on.  

Answer 7

you tried talking....maybe you need to go to a friends for a couple of days??? give the relationship space...miss each other..ya know? im sure this is hurting you...but dnt call it quits , three years is a pretty long time to be with someone..and you know relationships tend to go into down times..its natural. things dnt ever stay the same like the first year or even second. i suggest you play it safe and just chill out and go pamper ur self. do something that makes you feel good. dnt be so eager to spend time with him and dnt do the whole girl thing, where we tend to over talk and stuff. just treat him like he does you.  

Answer 8

Dump him and refuse to be with someone that treats you badly like that.  

Answer 9

I think you should back off and see if he calls you. You probably have him trained kind of like a monkey.

If he dosent call you up and wonder whats wrong then you know its time to move on.

Answer 10

Obviously hes having doubts & checking out new options. Id do the same, if I were you!!

Answer 11

It's hard to say what might be bothering him.Since you have  already talked to him about it and given him a chance to say what if anything is wrong it sounds like you should back off a bit and give him some space, see what happens. 3 Years is a long time to just walk away if you love him.

Best of Luck.

Answer 12

He's either gotten very comfortable with the fact that you two are together and will stay together or he's losing interest in the relationship.  Ask him which one it is.

Answer 13

People do slow down on dating and calling so much after awhile, but if he completely ignoring you that's another matter.  He shouldn't be doing that, not even if you been together for ten years.  He has something else going on or he's not really into the relationship.

Answer 14

Yes allot of the "fun stuff" tends to wear off in a relationship once the both of you get to comfortable with each other. BUT.... if you can;t get him to start doing more with you... thank the good Lord you didn't marry him cause honey find yourself a man that will.

Love is all about give and take and if your doing all the giving it's tiresome.  If your this unhappy now wait till your 5 or 6 years into a marriage and things like that happen. You have a perfect mate out there, everyone does and just maybe he isn't yours. I mean he could be but only if you explain all this to him (and really make him understand the severity of it) and he still isn't will to work on it. Allow him to take baby steps, it didn't happen over night and it wont fix over night eihter.