Is this normal to want a baby at 18, 19 in two weeks?

Question

i have been going out with my boyfriend over two years and we love each other. we live together and are pretty good when it comes to money. he makes over 20$ an hour, he is a manager. i dont have a job, but i plan on going back to school (comunity collage, i graduated high school). we are already talking about marrag, but not getting married because i feel we are too young and not ready. i feel so badly to want a baby with him and i dont know why. i know we are still too young, and there are things i want done befor i bring a child in this world ( i want to go back to school, have a house, be married a couple years) and i also dont like kids that much. so why do i feel like this? oh and dont be rude like say im a sinner living with my boyfriend befor marrage. im not asking if im a sinner. im not, im a responsible young woman and i know what im doing.

Answer 1

If you are too young and not ready for marriage then you are DEFINITELY NOT ready for a baby. You can get out of pretty much anything these days but a child is FOREVER. do not do this. If you do the one it will hurt the most in the long run is the poor child.

Answer 2

Oh, please, please wait!

All I can tell you is my story:

I struggled for years to complete school (long story) and when I was sure I was graduating (college) I finally planned a family with my husband. At 30.

Having a baby is the hardest, most trying thing on yourself, your marriage and your mental health. You can never have too much education or strength in your marriage, and you have PLENTY of time. Please, please wait!

Answer 3

is it really a sin to live with you significant other before getting married? i didnt know that. and it might just be a phase that you are going through. if i were you i wouldnt have a baby with him until you have a house, job, etc. like you said. make sure you are settled in somewhere and can handle the responcibility of raising a child

Answer 4

I'm a mom. I got pregnant at 16 and had my daughter at 17.  I'm now 18 with a 6 month old.  we both work and take care of our daughter, no babysitters included.  I'm in college, and when I'm done, he will be.  If it is what you want to do, then do it.  But think very carefully.  I was with my boyfriend for two years when we decided to have a baby.  Yes, I was still in high school, but even that went smoothly.. I was a straight A student and very involved in clubs and such... and everything worked out fine.  We're trying for our second.

Answer 5

"and I also don't like kids that much" Well then, you're not ready for a baby.

Also that $20/hour job may seem like a lot NOW but when you have a baby on your hands you'll wonder where the money has gone!

Answer 6

There can be so many underlying reasons for wanting a baby. Maybe you feel you want something that will physically tie you and your boyfriends together. This baby will make you one make you more complete. I def agree you should get married first and get a house and money (babies cost ALOT) before you go and have one. You want to have an education to get a good job to support your child. But yea i would say its normal to want a baby, you must love your bf and want that next step in life, a family. It's weird though that you dont really like kids and want one thoguht? But like i said there are so many underyling reasons in your subconsouis for wanting a baby you may never fully know.

Answer 7

Go to school, get a good job, get your house, get married then start thinking about kids. Once you have them you can't give them back so think long and hard before you have a baby and change your life forever.

Answer 8

What's your relationship with your parents like?  Do you have low self esteem?  Maybe, if the relationships in your life have previously made you feeling unwanted, the reason you want a baby is to feel needed by someone.  Just a guess.

Answer 9

Yes it's normal I totally understand what you are saying you are just feeling like you want a baby but know they are hardwork and not ready Im sure it's just a phase you are going through you are living w/boyfriend and you love him and living a married life so why not think of adding baby to make complete.........you will know when the time is really right