Is this rude or am i being to sensitive?

Question

last night at 11pm my mother and brother tied up not one but both of my houses bathrooms for thirty minutes. making so i couldnt go to bed. one was showering (mom) thee other number 2 with book.

im upset with the one who showered as she didnt ask me or my husband if we wanted to go or anything before she tied up the second bathroom and she knows we get up at 6 am. she also took a book in with her.

i asked last night but dont think i asked right

so was the above rude or not

its a lack of respect issue

Answer 1

You should pray to the Jesus for a answer and such.

Answer 2

Wouldn't say it was rude, just a bit inconsiderate. I can't imagine they did it on purpose though.

How about you make sure you get in the bathroom before you would normally start getting ready for bed, that way, you know you can just go off to bed when you want.

Otherwise just mention it in a conversational way, that you need to get to bed on time because you both get up early.

Answer 3

You are being too sensitive if you would not wait a few minutes then just knock on the door.   You mentioned that both bathrooms were 'tied up' but your never mentioned that you were waiting for one of them . . . did you just feel it was rude that someone did not clear it with you first?

Answer 4

Depends, whose house is it?  If it's your moms house and you and your husband do not pay rent then it's her right to do what she wants.  If your brother is under the age of living on his own then it's his right as well.  

Ok, since it is your house then yes it is rude, I would set rules that they can only use one bathroom.

Answer 5

A bathroom is not the place to read a book when other people are in the house, and might have a sudden need to go. It doesn't matter whose house it is - this is very basic courtesy.

Answer 6

I don't believe they were intentionally ganging up on you.  If you have other people in your house, you need to expect situations like this to arise.  It isn't worth getting in a huff over.  There are many more important things in life.

Answer 7

Maybe you shouldn't live with your mother anymore, especially if your married. Time to grow up, and get your own bathroom, then you won't have to worry about what time you need to get ready for bed!

Answer 8

People are sometimes far off from understanding what the words 'awareness' and 'considerate' are. So I just think its a bit of understanding that needs to be put in place.

What you could probably do is let them kindly know that you need to shower at like 9 p.m. everyday and that you'll be using it for 30 minutes each evening from 9 - 9:30 p.m. and if that's alright with all of them. That way, they will understand that they will allocate their real bathroom times separately and try not to cause distress to the ones who really needed to use it at that time.

In other words, talk with all of them, compromise bathroom mandatory times and what time would be good for each one to use. That way, you'll all feel better.

Hope that helps

Answer 9

Sensitive.

You're having hard feelings because both of your bathrooms happened to be in use at the same time, of course not on purpose. Maybe you felt disrespected because they didn't tell you how long they would be?

Your mother and brother would not intentionally do that to you, trust me.

They could not have realized the time, they might not have anticipated they would be in there that long or they didn't think you'd mind, they may have assumed that you were already in bed and were done for the night.. After all it was just a shower and a bathroom break.

I am thinking maybe your brother assumed the other bathroom would be free, as did your mother.. I am sure if they knew they were going to be in there for a long time and knew that the other had taken the other bathroom, they would of asked you if you wanted to get in quick.

I would tell you how to tell her to warn you next time but this was an honest mistake. You know, you are like feeling bad because the bathrooms were taken up at a time you needed them? It's like you are paranoid thinking they did it at the same time to purposely get to you lol, which they didn't.

You're being too hard on them. But if you must talk to them.. What you should do is tell her that you have a sleeping schedule you like to be on top of and you always get up at 6am regardless. If she is going to be in the shower long next time, to please tell you so that you can do what you have to before going to bed.

Answer 10

Is it rude?  ahhh I don't think so, I believe you need to set ground rules when you have folks staying in your home.  Be that as it may I am sure they were not intentional in being rude they just set out on the course that they had to take.  You need to say to them that if they will be using the bathroom for extended periods and turning it into a library that they may want to give you and your hubby a heads up.

Answer 11

Just a slip up prolly.  Unless it happens a lot, cut her a little slack.  She prolly just forgot to get clearance b4 going in.  I've done that with my child & even when he had a friend over!  I just wanted to get in & outta the b'room quickly, then took a little longer than I expected.

Not really lack of respect--just a momentary lapse.