Question:

Is this similar to self-harming?

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I cut my self a couple of times, but I stopped because while the pain was good for making me feel better, the blood made me sick. So instead, when I feel horribly depressed or I am angry or I just hate myself I use my nails and dig into my stomach and scratch at it and make it red, sore, and covered in little scratches. I've begun to cut my nails in triangles because it scratches deeper. It never draws blood, so thats good, and it doesn't scar, but it causes pain, which makes me feel better for a short time. I don't consider it the same as cutting since it doesn't have lasting effects.

I was at a pool party the other day and my best friend noticed the scratches on my stomach, even though I had a tankini and a t-shirt. She freaked out. She went right away to tell my mom but I freaked out and begged her not to and told her it would only get worse. she said "are you threatening me?!" I said "not really, more like threatening me. " She just got mad and said fine. whatever.

Do you consider it self-harming? I don't see a need for me to stop. It makes me feel better and doesn't really harm me.

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  1. STOP THIS AT ONCE!

    if you do this often then go see a therapist. people didnt start doing all this rubbish till recently, they think its cool. If you have that much pain then talk to a counsellor.

    I think your lame and has nothing else to do, its NOT cool


  2. Hi

    Do you know why it makes you 'feel' better?

    Yes, it is self harming. And yes there is a reason why it makes you 'feel' better. Because you are in control of the pain. Where as you can't control the pain that others have and are inflicting on you.

    There are so many people that have different ways of dealing with emotional pain caused by others.

    Some people do drugs, some people cut themselves and who knows what else. Like you, for instance I've never heard this one before, but it's truly something you need to stop and figure out what it is you can do to for your self.

    Not harmful? Yes, it is.  Emotionally.  Because it's a quick fix. That's why it just helps for a short period of time.  Sounds like you are shut down and you are the only one allowing your self to feel something.

    You've got to find a better healthier way of dealing and coping with life.  Loving your self!

    Katie


  3. yeh. its not normal behaviour

  4. yes! i mean who doesn't consider that as self harm?

    but ask your self why? you are doing this.

    and is it that necessary!

  5. Its self infliction

    Dont do it, get professional help!

  6. You say you dig a hole (I don't know how deep you go) into your stomach with a nail.  Then you proceed to scratch at the place where you dug the nail.  That wasn't enough.  So, you cut your finger nails in such a way as to do more damage to your stomach.

    So yes, I consider your actions to be self-harming.

  7. Umm.. of course it is, but it is better than cutting.

    I puke when I'm angry or feel bad so I can't tell you to stop. We all get over it eventually.

    But yeah seriously, of course. If you're scratching and making skin red and sore, what else could it be? :P

  8. i cant see the difference between a cut and a scratch unless its the blood so its a free world do what u want just b fore warn though what u going or should i say how u going to do this in a straight jacket when ur mom has u sent to the funny farm

  9. hey there, yes I too would agree that it is self harming,

    instead of self mutilating you could use a bucket of freezing cold icy water to dunk your arm in when you are feeling the need to realise your tension or you could hold the ice on your stomach/arms it does the same thing but without hurting yourself.

  10. its still destructive and still self-harming.

    try talking about whats on your mind, or dealing with your problems instead. its harder and possibly could hurt more to start, but its worth the effort to get rid of it.

    good luck

  11. It may not harm you now, but eventually it will escalate to where you do harm yourself.  Have you thought about a different release? Something less destructive?  Like take a martial arts class to let out frustration, or go running or yoga.  Exercising releases endorphins, which basically are "happy hormones" that escalate your mood.

    What's bothering you so much? Have you talked to somebody about it? That also helps a lot. It doesn't sound like it would, but it really does.  Why not talk to your mom or best friend?  You could even talk to me, send me an e-mail if you need to vent or just need to talk about something and you don't feel like you could tell somebody that you actually know.

  12. i used to do that on my arms. yes it is self harm whether it hurts or not. it is self infliction/ mutilation.

  13. Have you considered addressing the problems, themselves? See treatments for self harm, in section 16, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris where there are alternatives, and hotlines to call when needed. Anger management (section 4) and depression (section 2: view page R first, then young women's depression, page V, then teen depression) are addressed seperately. Also teens, in section 13.

    HATING YOURSELF.                         Re-program your emotional responses. Hate is a strong term; reduce it to: "I dislike myself, and my life, at present". This allows for the possibility of change. Realise, and accept that YOU are the one who programmed your mind, and that YOU have the ability to re-program it.        

              See the tips at ezy-build in section 2, particularly those in the mental-health-abc and conquering stress websites. Use the negative thought reprogramming technique, and read page 2L. Recognise, and challenge your negative monologue (self talk). Make a conscious commitment to being positive, and optimistic, even if it is apparently unrealistic, or inappropriate, because of the benefits it will provide, later on.      

         WORK, to change yourself into someone you can think much better of. See sections 38, and 47, and volunteer, even from home, at first, to provide a solid basis in reality for the daily affirmations: "I am a good person, who is valued by my community, because I (insert activity here)". As one insightful (paraphrasing poetically) person put it: an affirmation, without foundation is just mental masturbation.        

              Read: "Lift your mood now." by John D Preston, Psy.D. 2001, New Harbinger Publications, Inc., 5674 Shattuck Avenue, Oakland. CA 94609 http://www.amazon.com/ may be worth trying for this, as it has a good section on building self esteem, using a different approach. You can also learn to use the EFT, in section 53, several times daily: "Even though I dislike my current life situation, I deeply and completely accept myself". Consider taking up yoga, or t'ai chi.

  14. yeah i spose, i slap myself across the face

  15. It's not similar to self-harming hun, it is self harming.

    I started out like that.

    Just fingernails or blunt scissors.

    You think you can stay like that forever. And I kept it limited to that for about 3 years.

    I also hate blood. Well I thought I did.

    Now I'm cutting with little blades and drawing blood. My own blood doesn't freak me out anymore.

    Please stop if you still can.

    Whatever you think about being able to control it, you're wrong.

    I know you won't believe me because I was in the exact same position, but it will escalate- wether in a week or a year or a decade but please hunny if you can stop now try to please.

  16. Yeah it's self harming. Those scratches may turn into scars, so be careful --or better yet just stop and get help.

  17. Yes.. its destructive behaviour. Cutting isnt the only destructive behaviour out there.. Get help.  

  18. See, I do this sometimes too, on my arms.

    I've been reading the other answers and have derived that it is, in fact, self harm.

    Good question, though. I was wondering the same thing.

    As for your friend - she doesn't sound very caring at all, I mean, if she got angry at you...bah.

    Sorry, this isn't actually an answer, just a general comment :P

  19. yes it is

  20. It does have lasting effects because if feels better after you do it. This is self harming and it is a serious threat to yourself. The fact that your talking about it is a good sign, which means you want help. Talk to someoone about this...it's not the answer! (I've been clean for 4 years after 7 years of self harm).  

  21. Yes this is self harming. You need help. At least keep wounds clean and talk to someone. There may be an underlying cause that if you can find out what it is you may grow out of this unreasonable behaviour. See your local doctor who will direct you to those who can help sort out this problem before some un intended harming does you more harm than you bargain for.

  22. From a Law Enforcement perspective you are self mutilating your body. Despite what you believe you are hurting yourself physically. Please get help before your progress to a more drastic step and hurt yourself even more.

  23. yes, it is self harming because it hurts you and im sorry you feel you have to deal with things this way.

      im not being offensive but maybe you should get some help, talk to someone you trust when you have problems.

    best of luck

  24. "I cut my self a couple of times" ---  Say no more, YES that is self harm.

  25. If you really hated yourself you wouldn't even bother writing this stuff.  You are just looking for attention and sympathy.  Buy a dog, that way you can get unconditional love without the showing off.

  26. Yes, you are inflicting pain upon yourself even if you don't cut throught the skin. you do have to stop. If you are doing this  its due to a bigger problem obviously. Doing this is not going to get rid of your problems. As you said, this only makes you feel better for a short time. Not seeking the help you need to get at the root of your problems and helping you solve them is only going to lead to further self destruction.

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