Is this verbal abuse?

Question

I'm only 16, but for a large portion of my life the only thing issuing from my mum is "you ungrateful child" or "the most disrespectful daughter"

She has probably said "i hate you" more than "i love you"

i truly can't even remember the last time she has said comforting words to me.

she tells me to go to h**l, and that i make her want to kill herself. she throws things at me when she's angry. nothing that could really hurt me though.

she's not a drinker....she's not on drugs.

i have never done drugs, or done anything bad i get great grades....the worst thing i have ever done was come home late from school.

and what starts all our fighting is something simple....like i didn't fold ALL the laundry. or i left my shoes in the hallway.

she hates my father, they never get along, although my dad still says he loves her.

but then sometimes....everything is ok, everything is happy, everyone agrees and my family is just perfect. then the next minute i forgot to practice the piano, and it turns into more "undeserving child" fights.

i don't know what to do anymore, and sometimes i feel like calling a councelor but then the next day, there seems like there's no need because my mum decides to be nice.

i admit....i am SO scared of her. i just don't know what to do. there is no proof of verbal abuse so no one really understands when i tell them that i think there's a problem.

what am i to do????

Answer 1

Have you talked to your father about this? It sounds like your mother is bipolar. You mom may need some meds. If it is really hurting you...which it sounds like, you need to confront her. She is hurting you (emotionally) whether she notices or not. You obviously do not deserve that kind of treatment, and ignoring it or acting out is not the correct thing to do. If you keep calm as you confront her, she will probably see what she is doing to you. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 2

definitely talk to a counselor, you don't need to tell your mom about it. The counselor will tell you ways to deal with your mom, maybe she's just going through hard times with work, money, or marriage and taking it out on you, she might not realize how hard she's being on you. If you find ways to talk to her about it than maybe she'll realize what she's doing and stop. She definitely should NOT be throwing things at you and saying you should go to h**l is not ok. If you ever feel like your emotions or even life isn't safe around her than it can very possibly be abuse. But before you report anything, talk to her about. Maybe your dad can help too...  

Answer 3

well the next time she throws things at you throw stuff back. Stand up for yourself. Your a teenager rebel lol.  

Answer 4

the problem sure is with ur mom...well, if she wont listen 2 u n see a councelor, then mayb u can try giving her a doze of her own stuff... like, the next tym she starts a fight, retort back saying "you're the ungrateful mother", "how many mothers out there yell at their daughters like u do" "without a real big reason"..."if u didnt want me, why'd u have me born".. "now i have to face your temper evryday, evn though i'm way better than 80% of the teens around the world"....that should shut her up!...then u can go on n say how u feel when she does it to u...n mayb, she'll get all sentimental n open up to u...tell u her problems...wats bothering her, n wats the reason behind her mean behavior towards u...n den...u solve!