Is this wager in any way possible for me to win?

Question

Some chaps at my club have proposed a wager, where I am required to walk into a pub dressed as a common type, and pretend I am one of them (I've had my manservant purchase me a tracksuit, a baseball cap and some 'trainers'). If I manage to remain in the pub with these lager swilling peasants for an hour without being violently beaten, I win a ham.

Any tips on behaving like a gutter dwelling commoner?

Answer 1

Make sure it's a g*y bikers club and you'll surely fit right in.

Answer 2

Why you just save time and buy yourself a ham and have your manservant beat you to within an inch of your life. I'll actually buy the ham for you if you let me watch.

Answer 3

Oh my, is it really worth it,if you must do it let me know cos i want to see you GET BEAT UP you prick

Answer 4

do not do it ,,do not allow yourself to stoop this low for a silly bet .KEEP YOUR DIGNITY.......

Answer 5

watch george bush on tv and immitate him u be fine or get killed either way be funny

Answer 6

argue to receive the ham before hand so that if u do get jumped you can use it as a blunt weapon, or throw it as a distraction as you scarper

Answer 7

just stay at home and give yourself a 'ham shank'...di**head...

Answer 8

don't bother, you may get beaten in the pub and if you win you'll only get a ham-- sooo not worth it!

Answer 9

Always remember to misuse the comparative form of an adjective.

For example, never say "faster"; it's always "more faster".

Answer 10

keep ur gob shut ........

Answer 11

Have your manservant go buy you a ham.

Answer 12

That will be a challenge old boy, where does a gentleman begin with trying to lower himself to the gutter snipes level. Well I suppose you have already addressed the dress code issue, so next thing would be to do something about your personal hygiene of course being a gent it is immaculate and there in lays the problem instead of smelling of fine cigars and expensive brandy you should of course have a whiff of the sewers about you accompanied by an underlying smell of cheap cider.

Next thing to amend would be ones chit chat, I'm afraid talking about old Squiffy Poopkins Smithes hole in one at the golf club last summer would be a dead give away old boy, better stick to talking about how "you'd like to give the barmaid one" I believe that is the phrase. And something called "footy ball"

And of course whatever you do don't turn up in the Bentley, I'm afraid its public transport for you on this one old bean, oh and do remember to have your inoculations from doctor before you go. Tip top.

Answer 13

Good grief, I can't believe you really are taking up my wager.  You must be absolutely brassic.  My advice?  Drink and keep drinking, litter your speech with profanities and go in reeking of marijuana.  

Other than that, good bye and good luck!  I'll send Mrs. Leverlily's daughter in with you as a guide if you so wish.