Is this weird.....(see details)?

Question

I really don't ever want to be married.I think that if I have a boyfriend who I love and would want to spend the rest of my life with and I knew it then I would just stay boyfriend and girlfriend and have our children or whatever.I just think that if you merry someone and it doesn't work out you have to go through so much to get divorced,that if you just stay with a boyfriend and you have children the only thing you would have to do is leave.But this is my thoughts on it.

Any thoughts on why I might feel this way

Answer 1

I actually know a lot of people who think and are in relatioships like this. I think with marriage, besides the Religious and Traditional aspect of it, most people see it as a symbol of commitment, but if you can acheive that without actually being married, and you feel totally comfortable and safe within a relationship there is no need for the actual marriage. I can't tell you why you feel that way but I can tell you why I feel like that, its because I feel that I do not want to be forced by anyone or anything to do anything, If I am in a relationship with someone it is because I want to be in it, and I do not want something that is going to constrict me into staying in a situation that I no longer feel comfortable in, if thats the case. I feel like if that constraint isn't there, then It will make the relationship more significant since we both are there because care about one another and we enjoy each other's company and not because our that is what we are "supposed" to do.

Answer 2

Most states have laws on common law marriages, which is exactly what you are describing.  In my state, Illinois, if you have lived with a person for at least 7 years, then you are considered to have a "common law marriage" and will have to go through legal preceedings in order to be considered "single" again.  Do research online to determine your state's laws on that.  

Also, not marrying is your choice, but keep in mind that you might feel differently once you are in that situation.

Good Luck!

~Emily

Answer 3

I totally see where you are coming from. I hate the whole idea that most people have that you have to be married before you can have children, be 100% committed, etc.

Answer 4

Nope!  I'm the same way.  I've seen too many marriages go bad.  A relationship can go bad too, but I think marriage puts so much more pressure on the relationship.