Islamically,can a man divorce his wife,without her knowledge..Thatz ridiculous..Isn't it?

Question

.I just read an article when a wife comes to know that her husband divorced her,only when she got the Legal letter..

Wow..thatz so sexist...how can a man throw away a woman whenever he wishes to..

If I am wrong,pls bring any proof .Bcoz I read this from gulfnews, a reliable newspaper,and I find no reason to disbelieve..

Salam and thanks

And Ladies,how would you feel if you wake one day to find divorce paper by your side..

Pls dn't give c**p answers like"My husband wn't do this to me"

I am asking,"Is this technically possible"???

Answer 1

=O

that should sooo not be allowed?

is it??

>=O

=/

Answer 2

Yes this is possible, but I think it has little to do with being a Muslim, and more to do with Middle Eastern laws and society.

Answer 3

Do you know the reason that the man divorced his wife? If not then why are you speaking about their personal business? Fear Allaah and respect other peoples privacy and have Husn adh-Dhann for the people rather than jump to claims that it is "sexist" without knowing the reasons behind it.

EDIT:

Master of Hadeeths? Where did you get that from? I'm definitely not a Muhaddith or anywhere near it.

However your question has very little to do with Hadeeth.

Answer 4

Islam never takes marriage and divorce lightly. The words of divorce are serious and one should say them with the full understanding of the consequences. One should not say or write even in one's private notes that he has divorced his wife.

In his well-known book, The Reliance of the Traveler, Ahmad ibn Naqeeb Al-Misri, states:

"The words that effect a divorce may be plain or allusive. Plain words effect the divorce whether one intends divorce or not, while allusive words do not effect it unless one intends divorce.

Using plain words to effect a divorce means making a clear pronouncement of the word “divorce” or words derived from it. When the husband says "I divorce you," or "you are divorced", the wife is automatically divorced, whether he has made the intention or not.

Forms of allusive words that effect a divorce include:

1- the husband's saying, "You are now alone," "You are free," "You are separated," "You are parted," "You are no longer lawful to me," "Rejoin your kin," "You are footloose," and the like,

2- his saying, "I am divorced from you",

3- when he commissions the wife to pronounce the divorce, and she says, "You are divorced",

4- when someone asks, "Do you have a wife?'' and he says "No'',

5- and when the husband writes words that effect the divorce (no matter whether he is able or unable to speak at the time of writing, or whether he is present or absent, or whether he writes in plain or allusive words).

Divorce is effected only if intention couples the utterance of or writing any of the above.‏

However, if a husband is asked: "Have you divorced your wife?'' and he says "Yes,'' then she is divorced (even if he does not intend that). ‏

If the husband says, "You are divorced," and thereby intends a two or threefold pronouncement, then whatever number he intends is effected, this rule holds for all words that effect a divorce, whether plain or allusive. The proof that a single pronouncement can validly effect a threefold divorce is that when Rukana divorced his wife and then said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) "I did not intend it except as one time,'' the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) made him swear to that effect, and then returned her wife to him. Accordingly, if a single pronouncement could not effect a threefold divorce, there would not have been any point in the Prophet's making him swear to that effect. ‏

If a husband tells his wife, "You are divorced inshaa' Allah (if Allah wills),'' or "if Allah does not will,'' or "unless Allah wills,'' then the divorce is not effected."

Answer 5

Islam can not be Judge by  people's action.

Its not ridiculous. Men has the right of Divorcing his Wife.Justice is something else of His own choice.You can't blame others of one's injustice.

Edit @ Asker

I am not confused. I am saying Husband has the Right of divorcing his Wife. but Justice is only of His own Choice ,no matter what the Religion says about it.

Islam say not to be injustice , its an injustice to throw her away one fine morning without letting her knew it.but making that justice is in his own choice , others have nothing to do with his act.

edit @ asker (lol) i answered you already.what else you expect from us? everything never goes as like the way they want it to be.

edit @ asker pardon me !, If i said anything wrong that disgrace you.

Answer 6

It can't be possible. It is against the very essence of the woman-protecting Islam.

Answer 7

It's only happening in Muslims ?

goodmorning man.......... wake up it's morning

Answer 8

and a women can do the same to her husband it is called khul3

Answer 9

I personally think that is between a persons own marital life, but allah (swt) states in the Qur'an that we must treat eachother equally and also try and reconcile a marriage if there is trouble together. Divorce is seen as a last resort and supposed to be thoroughly thought through by both companions, seeing that is seen as a last resort and much dsiliked in islam.

“If you fear a breach between them twain, appoint (two) arbiters, one from his family and the other from hers; if they wish for peace, Allah will cause their reconciliation: For Allah has full knowledge, and is acquainted with all things.” (Surah al-Nisa, V. 35)

Assalamu alaikum wb

Answer 10

Islamically speaking NO! he cannot divorce her WITHOUT HER KNOWLEDGE. In islam you have to say i divorce you three times to the wife and you have to have to try and work on your relationship. Its a time where you have to reflect and see what is going wrong in the marriage. "I divorce you" also has to be said in three different circumstances for the marriage to be void. I guess that people in the article weren't following islamic law/customs than =]

Answer 11

The picture of COW in the book do not eat grass.

Divorce is allowed to both me and women. after proper consultation mediation and councelling.

but in practice.................

and no such criticism come from muslims that is the worse.

Answer 12

@ Asker,

Are you saying that

a) Allah (swt) is Sexist?

b) The scholars have changed the laws of Allah (swt)?

or c) something else?

A husband can divorce his wife - we know this is from Hukm Sharia'a  - it was the practice of many of the Sahaba (ra).

Can you please clarify what you are trying to say?

JZK

Answer 13

No.

Answer 14

Not permissible by Glorious Quran

From a reading of the Quran we learn that God does not favour divorces and in fact encourages the continuation of marriage. God has imposed prohibitions on certain category in marriage. However for those who comes to know of these prohibitions afterwards are commanded not to break existing marriages - see 4:22-23.

Divorce must be resorted to only in exceptional circumstances. The laws relating to divorce together with the relevant verses from the Quran are given below:

Appoint an arbitrator

[4:35] If a couple fears separation, you shall appoint an arbitrator from his family and an arbitrator from her family; if they decide to reconcile, GOD will help them get together. GOD is Omniscient, Cognizant.

Wait 4 months cooling off before divorce

[2:226-227] Those who intend to divorce their wives shall wait four months (cooling off); if they change their minds and reconcile, then GOD is Forgiver, Merciful. If they go through with the divorce, then GOD is Hearer, Knower.

If the estranged couple chooses separation they must go through with it equitably. There must be two equitable witnesses witness the divorce before GOD

[65:2] Once the interim is fulfilled, you may reconcile with them equitably, or go through with the separation equitably. You shall have two equitable witnesses witness the divorce before GOD. This is to enlighten those who believe in GOD and the Last Day. Anyone who reverences GOD, He will create an exit for him.

Divorced women to observe an interim period

[2:228] The divorced women shall wait three menstruations (before marrying another man). It is not lawful for them to conceal what GOD creates in their wombs, if they believe in GOD and the Last Day. (In case of pregnancy,) the husband's wishes shall supersede the wife's wishes, if he wants to remarry her. The women have rights, as well as obligations, equitably. Thus, the man's wishes prevail (in case of pregnancy). GOD is Almighty, Most Wise.

[65:4-5] As for the women who have reached menopause, if you have any doubts, their interim shall be three months. As for those who do not menstruate, and discover that they are pregnant, their interim ends upon giving birth. Anyone who reverences GOD, He makes everything easy for him. This is GOD's command that He sends down to you. Anyone who reverences GOD, He remits his sins, and rewards him generously.

Exception for observing interim period

[33:49] O you who believe, if you married believing women, then divorced them before having intercourse with them, they do not owe you any waiting interim (before marrying another man). You shall compensate them equitably, and let them go amicably.

After the fulfilment of the interim the divorced women is free to do whatever she wants

Although the following verse is in context of widows, it appears to be applicable to a divorcees too.

You Shall Observe the Pre-Marriage Interims

[2:234] Those who die and leave wives, their widows shall wait four months and ten days (before they remarry). Once they fulfill their interim, you commit no error by letting them do whatever righteous matters they wish to do. GOD is fully Cognizant of everything you do.

[2:235] You commit no sin by announcing your engagement to the women, or keeping it secret. GOD knows that you will think about them. Do not meet them secretly, unless you have something righteous to discuss. Do not consummate the marriage until their interim is fulfilled. You should know that GOD knows your innermost thoughts, and observe Him. You should know that GOD is Forgiver, Clement.

Divorced women have to be provided for. This is probably one of the abused laws in the Quran. But God holds us responsible for our innermost thoughts. If one observes God’s laws then God makes it easy for him / her.

[65:7] The rich husband shall provide support in accordance with his means, and the poor shall provide according to the means that GOD bestowed upon him. GOD does not impose on any soul more than He has given it. GOD will provide ease after difficulty.

             Alimony For Widows and Divorcees

[2:240] Those who die and leave wives, a will shall provide their wives with support for a year, provided they stay within the same household. If they leave, you commit no sin by letting them do whatever they wish, so long as righteousness is maintained. GOD is Almighty, Most Wise.

[2:241] The divorcees also shall be provided for, equitably. This is a duty upon the righteous.

Compensation when marriage is not consummated

Breaking the Engagement

[2:236] You commit no error by divorcing the women before touching them, or before setting the dowry for them. In this case, you shall compensate them - the rich as he can afford and the poor as he can afford - an equitable compensation. This is a duty upon the righteous.

[2:237] If you divorce them before touching them, but after you had set the dowry for them, the compensation shall be half the dowry, unless they voluntarily forfeit their rights, or the party responsible for causing the divorce chooses to forfeit the dowry. To forfeit is closer to righteousness. You shall maintain the amicable relations among you. GOD is Seer of everything you do.

Divorced women entitled to stay in the same house she stayed before divorce

Do Not Throw the Divorcees Out Onto the Streets

[2:231] If you divorce the women, once they fulfill their interim (three menstruations), you shall allow them to live in the same home amicably, or let them leave amicably. Do not force them to stay against their will, as a revenge. Anyone who does this wrongs his own soul. Do not take GOD's revelations in vain. Remember GOD's blessings upon you, and that He sent down to you the scripture and wisdom to enlighten you. You shall observe GOD, and know that GOD is aware of all things.

[65:6] You shall allow them to live in the same home in which they lived with you, and do not make life so miserable for them that they leave on their own. If they are pregnant, you shall spend on them until they give birth. If they nurse the infant, you shall pay them for this service. You shall maintain the amicable relations among you. If you disagree, you may hire another woman to nurse the child.

Divorce can be retracted twice:

In other words, if the couple reconciles after the first divorce and wish to be husband and wife again, they can re-marry. This is allowed for two divorce only. If the couple divorces third time they have to observe God's commandment in 2:230 (quoted below.) God makes it not-so-easy for the couple to divorce. This law serves as a deterrent for those who want a divorce for the third time and they would be very careful to take this step.

[2:229] Divorce may be retracted twice. The divorced woman shall be allowed to live in the same home amicably, or leave it amicably. It is not lawful for the husband to take back anything he had given her. However, the couple may fear that they may transgress GOD's law. If there is fear that they may transgress GOD's law, they commit no error if the wife willingly gives back whatever she chooses. These are GOD's laws; do not transgress them. Those who transgress GOD's laws are the unjust.

[2:232] If you divorce the women, once they fulfill their interim, do not prevent them from remarrying their husbands, if they reconcile amicably. This shall be heeded by those among you who believe in GOD and the Last Day. This is purer for you, and more righteous. GOD knows, while you do not know.

[2:230] If he divorces her (for the third time), it is unlawful for him to remarry her, unless she marries another man, then he divorces her. The first husband can then remarry her, so long as they observe GOD's laws. These are GOD's laws; He explains them for people who know.

Also note the words "It is not lawful for the husband to take back anything he had given her." in 2:229.

In case there is a baby during the interim: If during the observation of the interim period it is discovered that the divorced women is pregnant then as stated in 65:4 the interim ends upon giving birth. God has decreed the following law dealing with the infant:

[2:233] Divorced mothers shall nurse their infants two full years, if the father so wishes. The father shall provide the mother's food and clothing equitably. No one shall be burdened beyond his ability. No mother shall be harmed on account of her infant, nor shall the father be harmed because of his infant. (If the father dies), his inheritor shall assume these responsibilities. If the infant's parents mutually agree to part, after due consultation, they commit no error by doing so. You commit no error by hiring nursing mothers, so long as you pay them equitably. You shall observe GOD, and know that GOD is Seer of everything you do.

Under what conditions can a woman divorce her husband.?

Whichever party chooses for divorce must obey the laws as aforesaid. Normally divorce is mutually decided by the couple. If the aforesaid laws are observed, there could be a situation where either of the spouse may not give their consent but if the arbitrators from both the families decide that divorce is the best solution for the estranged couple then they would, nevertheless go through divorce. The divorce laws are applicable to both man and woman (4:35 and 2:237 indicate this) except that there are certain additional laws which a divorced woman has to observe.

The following seem to be the only conditions where a believing women leaves her husband without observing the above laws. In fact, I think in this case even a formal divorce is not required under Quran. However if the law of the land requires a formal divorce then one must follow suit.

[60:10]  O you  

Answer 15

I can't provide  a hadith or anything to answer the first part of your question. All I know is that you can't legally get divorced until you or your husband has said "I divorce you" 3 times. And not like "I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you. There! Go pack your stuff."    But it has to be said on three separate occasions. Like ok....here's what happened to someone I know....

the first time, she and her husband were having a fight. They were going on vacation and she wanted to pack his bags, otherwise she knew he'd only pack a few socks and underwears and nothing nice in case of a fancy dinner. And they got into a heated argument and he ended up saying "I don't want you to pack my bags because I'm going to divorce you!"

And the second time, he was on his way to visit a female friend, on his own without his wife. (Haram I know) But his wife woudln't let him and kept following him. He called a cop and the cop asked her who she is. And when she tol dhim "I'm his wife" the cop asked him "Why are you going to see another woman when you have a wife" and the man said "She is not my wife. I divorce her"

I don't know what happened the third time, but there was a third time.

She didn't say anything one day. He went to work and without him knowing, she took the afternoon off. She went home, cooked enough suppers to last for a week and a half. Cleaned the house. And then packed all of the things she needed and left him a note calmly saying that she divorces him and will be staying with family, and that he can expect to get formal divorce papers in the mail. and PS. supper in the freezer.

I know my husband wouldn't never just divorce me, just like that (had to get the c**p answer out of the way lol) but if I did, I'd be rip roaring mad! like MAD. I mean, this is someone that you cared enough to marry and try to create a home with. The least you could do is give them the courtesy of the 3 "I divorce you" things. At least then the woman would know what's in the back of her husband's mind. If he did that, I wold find a way to make things not go easy for him.