Islamically,who gets custody of kids,if divorce happens?

Question

ok.to all who says "father",what is your response to Dhul's hadith??

Also,Dhul,is that what is in practise?Can anybody please bring any related source and tell logic if any behind such a ruling..

Salam

Answer 1

If the kids are not adults - the mom

If they are adults - the dad

Xtreme L is right.

In case of males , the child stays with his mom till the age of 7 then the father takes his custody if hes a good man ofcourse.

In case of girl .. tell they become "adults" then the father takes the custody

Answer 2

The father does =)

Answer 3

In principle, child custody is the wife's right and responsibility because women are more likely to treat children mercifully and look after their needs. Malik related in his book Al-Muwatta' that a woman of the Ansar was married to `Umar ibn Al-Khattab. She bore `Asim ibn `Umar to him, and then he separated from her. `Umar came to Quba and found his son `Asim playing in the courtyard of the mosque. He took him by the arm and placed him before him on his mount. The grandmother of the child saw him and argued with `Umar about the child, so they went to Abu Bakr As-Siddiq. `Umar said, "My son." The woman said, "My son." Abu Bakr said, "Do not interfere between a child and its mother." `Umar did not repeat his words.

EDIT:

A man came to the Prophet and said, "O Allah's Apostle! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man said. "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man further said, "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man asked for the fourth time, "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your father."

Sahih Bukhari, Volume 8, Book 73, Number 2

More information here:

http://www.soundvision.com/Info/mothers/...

Answer 4

Sara- Do you have any proof for your answer. If it was it would stupid. Let say the Mother did not look after kids but she still manages to get custody of them|?

Answer 5

Islamic Jurisprudential inferences Islamic law on custody of children after divorce is based on several hadith relating to how the Prophet sallalahu Alaihe wasallam dealt with cases brought before him.

One of the key relevant hadith is the following:

According to Amr Ibn Shu'aib, a woman came to the Prophet* and said: 'Truly my belly served as a container for my son here, and my breast served as a skin-bag for him (to drink out of) and my bosom served as a refuge for him; and now his father has divorced me, and he (also) desires to take him away from me.' The Prophet sallalahu Alaihe wasallam said: 'You have a better right to have him, as long as you do not marry again. (Hadith: Ibn Majah)

The mother is recognised as generally the fittest person to take care of the children, because of the instinctive love and tenderness she feels for them and her closer contact with them throughout pregnancy, nursing, and childhood. However, if the mother marries again she would generally forfeit her right to custody. However, the period of female custody ends once the child reaches a certain age of custodial transfer.

The Hanbali and Shafii schools do not distinguish between girls and boys regarding the duration of female custody. The Hanbalis maintain that the female custodian should have custody from birth until the child reaches the age of seven, at which point he or she may choose between parents.

The Shafiis allow female custody until the child reaches the age of discretion and may choose either parent as custodian. The Malikis rule that female custody of a boy shall last until he reaches puberty, and for a girl until she marries.

Under the Hanafi School, female custody of a boy ends when he is able to feed, clothe, and cleanse himself. Most Hanafi jurists set this age of independence at seven years, although some set it at nine. Hanafi jurists differ on when a mother’s custody of her daughter ends.

Most maintain that the mother’s custody ends when the girl reaches puberty, set at either nine or eleven years of age. However, others allow the mother’s custody to last until the girl reaches the age of womanhood. Conditions of custody Whoever has custody of a child has to abide by conditions concerning residence and Islamic upbringing, to ensure that the child's welfare is properly cared for.

The court may, if necessary, enforce these conditions or direct that the child be given to the next eligible custodian. The father should have access to his children, and he remains financially responsible for their maintenance and education even though they may be under the care of their divorced mother or one of her relations. Duration of custody and Transfers The duration of custody varies between the Four Schools of Islamic Jurisprudence as detailed earlier.

There are different criterions for transfer of custody to next eligible candidate as  below:  

Hanafi ;-

Law Transfer trigger:- Boy: 7 / 9 year age , Boy: Choice of either parents # Girl: marriage / 9-11 age , Girl: Father

Next Eligible custodian = Maternal grandmother - paternal grandmother - Mother’s sister (khala)

______________________________________...

Shafi’e ;-

Law Transfer trigger:- 7 years age/ discretion age , Choice of either parents

Next Eligible custodian = Maternal grandmother - paternal grandmother - Mother’s sister (khala)

______________________________________...

Maliki ;-

Law Transfer trigger:- Boy: Maturity , Girl: Marriage . Grandmother

  

Next Eligible custodian:- Maternal grandmother / Khala - Paternal grandmother

______________________________________...



Hanbali ;-

Law Transfer trigger:- 7 years age , Choice of either parents

Next Eligible custodian:- Maternal grandmother - paternal grandmother - Mother’s sister (khala)

______________________________________...

Answer 6

Custody is a difficult issue at any case.  The judge would have to overlook the case and then make a decision based on the well being of the child.  Allah knows best!

Answer 7

I alway understood age under 7 with mom, after the child is 7 dad. If he agrees to let the child stay with mom after 7th birthday fine, if not he can go to court to get the custody.

But i started googling...... cause i wanted to know if this has any basis.

This article has some very good info:

8.0 - Child Custody Following Divorce

Under Shari'a, a father is the natural guardian (al waley) of his children's persons and property. Shia doctrine also gives the child's paternal grandfather joint guardianship.[83] According to Shari'a, a child's paternal grandfather is his or her natural guardian after the father.[84] Under the laws of countries such as Kuwait , guardianship passes to the next relative on the father's side if the father and paternal grandfather are unable to act as guardian.[85] Depending on local laws, a father may be able to transfer his power of attorney over his child to other family members. In custody abduction cases, a father brought into court may use this as a means of keeping the child in the custody of his relatives and he may claim that he lacks legal authority to return the child to its mother.

A mother generally has a right to physical, not legal, custody of her child until the child reaches the age of custodial transfer, at which time the child is returned to the physical custody of the father or the father's family. The right to physical custody is not an absolute right in the sense that a mother or father who possesses physical custody may not prevent the other parent from seeing the child. While the parent with physical custody cannot be compelled to send the child to the other parent's residence for visits, he or she must bring the child to a place where the other parent can see him or her.[86] Furthermore, in order to have physical custody, a parent must fulfill certain conditions. Firstly, the father or mother seeking custody must have reached majority and must be sane. He or she must also be capable of raising the child, looking after its interests, and protecting its physical and moral interests. Aside from these basic requirements, there are specific requirements based on the parent's gender.[87] Since, by definition, Muslim fathers satisfy the specific requirements of a male custodian,[88] the following discussion will address only the requirements placed on a mother.

8.1 - Requirements of a Mother Custodian

To have physical custody, most juristic schools maintain that a mother must not be married to a stranger (a non-relative) or to a relative who is not in a prohibited degree of relation to the child.[89] The Shias, however, prohibit a mother from retaining custody if she marries any other man as long as the child's father is alive and eligible for custody.[90] While only the Shafii and Shia schools require a mother to be Muslim in order to have physical custody over a Muslim child born to a Muslim father, the Hanafi school considers denouncement of Islam (apostasy) a sufficient ground for denying a mother who was previously Muslim her right to custody.[91] Jurists of the other Sunni schools generally only require that the mother raise the child in the Islamic faith. However, the Sunni schools maintain that a mother loses her right to custody if there is reason to believe that she would influence the child's religious beliefs so as to compromise his or her Islamic upbringing. Examples of this would be the mother taking the child to church, teaching the child the articles of another religion, or performing the rites of another religion in front of him or her.[92] Certain other requirements also must be satisfied for a mother to have custody, such as the requirement that the mother not house the child in a home where he or she is disliked.[93]

8.2 - A Mother's Right to Physical Custody

In recognition of an infant's need for female care, all the juristic schools give first preference to a mother's claim to physical custody of her young child provided that she satisfies all the requirements for a female custodian.[94] After divorce during the period of the mother's custody, she is generally entitled to receive custody wages from the father to help her maintain the child.[95] However, the period of female custody ends once the child reaches a certain age of custodial transfer. The Hanbali and Shafii schools do not distinguish between girls and boys regarding the duration of female custody. The Hanbalis maintain that the female custodian should have custody from birth until the child reaches the age of seven, at which point he or she may choose between parents. The Shafiis allow female custody until the child reaches the age of discretion and may choose either parent as custodian. The Malikis rule that female custody of a boy shall last until he reaches puberty, and for a girl until she marries.[96] Under the Hanafi school, female custody of a boy ends when he is able to feed, clothe, and cleanse himself. Most Hanafi jurists set this age of independence at seven years, although some set it at nine. Hanafi jurists differ on when a mother's custody of her daughter ends. Most maintain that the mother's custody ends when the girl reaches puberty, set at either nine or eleven years of age. However, others allow the mother's custody to last until the girl reaches the age of womanhood.[97]

The importance of the early nurturing and physical custody of the mother is emphasized and protected in many Islamic countries. Preserving the bond between mothers and their young children is so important that it may result in the children accompanying their mother to prison. In Saudi Arabia , for instance, it has been observed by the author that nearly half of the population of the Central Riyadh Woman's Prison in 1983 consisted of children under the age of seven years. Another American mother, who was also imprisoned in the Kingdom during a divorce dispute with her Saudi husband in the early 1990s, also reported on the number of young children who accompanied their mothers into prison. One American woman told of a Saudi woman who had been imprisoned because her husband's family accused her of infidelity when she became pregnant several months after her husband's death. The Shari'a court would not separate a breast-feeding infant from its mother. Following the child's birth, the mother made every effort to extend breast-feeding and would not wean the child. After two years, the court found the mother unfit on religious grounds and the child was taken from her.

For the rest and to check the references, see the link.

Answer 8

from ISLAM ONLINE

Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear brother in Islam, we would like to thank you for the great confidence you place in us, and we implore Allah Almighty to help us serve His cause and render our work for His Sake.

Marriage is indeed a sacred bond that brings together a man and a woman by virtue of the teachings of the Qur'an and the Sunnah. Thus, each partner in this sacred relationship must treat the other beautifully and properly.

A man must not divorce his wife to bring harm upon her, as this constitutes an act that demolishes this noble establishment, breaks the woman’s heart, and possibly separates the woman from her children without any reason. Thus, the separation between a man and his wife [without just reason] was considered one of the major and grave sins, and one of the most beloved actions of Satan, as was narrated in a number of hadiths. It is also forbidden for a woman to ask for a divorce without a sensible reason.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Among lawful things, divorce is most hated by Allah." (Reported by Abu Dawud) The spouses should avoid divorce as much as possible. If they have difficulties and problems they should try to work out their differences and seek help from their relatives, friends or professional counselors. They should also consider and think of the future of their children and the destructive effects of divorce on their children's future. However, if the differences are irreconcilable then divorce is permissible, but it should be done in a decent manner.

In this regard, Allah Almighty says: "When ye have divorced women, and they have reached their term, then retain them in kindness or release them in kindness. Retain them not to their hurt so that ye transgress (the limits). He who doeth that hath wronged his soul. Make not the revelations of Allah a laughing stock (by your behavior), but remember Allah's grace upon you and that which He hath revealed unto you of the Scripture and of wisdom, whereby He doth exhort you. Observe your duty to Allah and know that Allah is Aware of all things." (Al-Baqarah: 231) The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) says, "No harm shall be inflicted or reciprocated in Islam."

As for the custody of children, we see that daughters should remain with their mother until they get married. As for male kids, they should remain with their mother until they reach the age of puberty, and then shifted to their father in order to get acquainted with the traits of manhood.

May Allah guide you to the straight path and direct you to that which pleases Him.

You can also read:

Effect of Divorce on Marital Home and Child’s Custody

Answer 9

it's the mother's right if she isn't married

Answer 10

Islamically if the child is above 7, the child stays with the father if he is religious .

But if the father is not religious then the child stays with the mother

Its not really about being more religious, as long as the father implements the 5 pillars of islam that is enough. Even if the mother is more religious, the children go to the father

I ment if the father is a secular person

Answer 11

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

my question is not showin up

Answer 12

According to Islamic Shariah, kids always belong to father.  In case of divorce mother keeps the children until age 10 for girl and 12 for boys.

Then she sends them to father's house where his family takes care of them. Father keep paying the expenses to mother for raising the children.  If mother marrys again, her daughter of previous husband has to be sent to father for her protection from the step father.  He is nothing to the girl and can molest her. The boy needs father after he is 12 years old to learn to be man. These are rules of Allah for the best interests of children.  Without children of previous marriages, mother can remarry and have children again. These are rules made by Allah in Islam.  They are never changed.  In Islamic countries there is never a law suits for the custody of children.  Father always let the children stay with mother until the prescribed age of children unless mother sends the children to father earlier to get married again.  

Answer 13

they stay with their mother until a certain age the decide weither they stay with their mother or go with their father.

Answer 14

Mom untill they start self surviving and after Dad