Isn't the American adoption Torture, I mean, Process the problem?

Question

Guatamala is booming in the adoption business because it is so hard here in the USA. I know people who are qualified in every sense of the word -income, age, temperament, etc. -who tried in the us to get older kids, infants, whatever and they process is so long and daunting and intrusive for no reason that thye gave up and adopted abroad.

Answer 1

i want to say that "Julie J" nailed your question. that is by far one of the best responses i've read.

Answer 2

Guatamala has big ethical problems at the moment, which is why so many people are adopting from there.  The process is so long and hard because they want to be as sure as they can be that the people trying to adopt are good people who will treat the child well, demonstrate and understanding of adoption needs, and it takes time for all the paperwork to be processed.  The standards still aren't as strict as they could be, but I understand it must feel like an eternity to the people who are waiting.  Did the people you know try to adopt from foster care?  That's usually pretty quick, even if you haven't been a foster parent first.  Good luck anyways.

Answer 3

1 in every 100 guatemalan children get adopted to the U.S.

can you believe that statistic? seriously, thats frightening. Our country should be addressing the issues on why so many children are getting adopted from the country. As someone who has been to peru and ecuador and guatemala for a like, a day lol. I saw and lived with the people for a few months. From what I saw they wanted nothing to do with surrendering their children infact many referred to americans as being fearful of them of coming and trying to take their babies.

Many didn't mind living in the poverty, they were happy, and leading happy lives. What WE may consider poverty when we're used to one family homes and clean communities, others consider it not being a necessity and they make it just fine. Lifestyles are different and I do not believe that we have a right to remove children from other countries because we're richer.

If you really wanted to help a child in guatemala why not sponsor their entire family for a fraction of the adoption. Help them get on their feet. $1000 to you is months of living for them.

I guess some people are only willing to pay that price for a child in return. I haven't sponsored a family, but I will one day when I'm on my feet and financially able to do so. I will also open my house to foster children who really need stability once my children are grown and gone. Helping a child is helping a child. You don't have to have your name on a fake birth certificate to be a mother. There are so many ways to enrich your life with motherhood. Don't get hung up on the idea of an infant that you can RE-name, and remove from their country because you dont want them in reunion.

As an adoptee, if my aparents did that intentionally to me, i would be livid. It would sever our relationship entirely.

Answer 4

You're kidding, right?

The process in the U.S. is no more difficult than internationally.

Guatemala has SERIOUS ethical problems right now... that's why the adoption BUSINESS is booming there.

Um, not that there aren't ethical problems in the U.S. process--there are--but Guatemala's especially corrupt these days--and on top of that, quite a few people adopt from there so that they won't have to "deal with" us biological parents. No bio parents, baby comes to U.S. when quite young, lack of ethics = booming business.

Answer 5

Is the process the problem of why you cannot adopt a child in America?  

First, let's state that there are currently thousands of children here in America who are in the foster care system and could use a home right now.  If your definition of an adoptable child is limited to a healthy newborn child, without siblings, without physical or mental challenges, & not belonging to an ethnic minority, then yes, you could say that there are few children here.  If you say you want to adopt the children here, but you are not willing to do the required checklist to complete the process, or you are not qualified here for one reason or another, is that necessarily a bad thing that you didn't get a child here?  The people who are willing to go through the required steps should be given the first opportunities to adopt the children here, and the children deserve the most qualified adoptive parents.

If you are saying the problem is there are not enough children here, we should be thankful that there are not more needy, abused, or homeless children looking for homes here.

Let me compare it to applying for a job to a top company that currently does not need any more employees.  They do not "owe" you a job.  You may be qualified, it may be frustrating, but you must accept the fact that you will need to find a job elsewhere or go without a job.  They need not fire somebody else in order to make a position for you there.  They need not expand in order to include you either.  Take what they offer, or go someplace else.  Nobody said we must redistribute our children so that everyone else in America with appropriate income/age, etc. gets one.  It doesn't work like that.

However, if you view the situation as everyone having a right to raise children if they have more money, etc. then you are like the CEO's rich nephew who comes in and expects to take somebody else's job and move right up.  The adoption situation then really becomes one of providing needy people with children rather than providing homes for needy children.  That is essentially reducing children to a commodity to meet the economic supply/demand of childless people.  

Let's not reverse how it should work.  It's not really about giving childless people what they want unless it also meets the child's needs FIRST.  Let's not lose sight of what the true objective is when it comes to adoption, and that is serving the needs of CHILDREN who truly need homes.

In summary, If you want to help the children here, consider the children who need help here.  If you don't want to help the children here, then expand your options, but do not blame it on the process.  Blame it on your expectations or on your limitations instead.

julie j

Answer 6

And many of the international options are slimming down and becoming more restricted.

Still trying to see the torture in it since the firstmom has no rights and the adoptive parents have all the rights.  Heaven forbid that there is a standard (albet not the greatest) that is followed and not being bought as is often the case in international situations.

Answer 7

Guatamala is booming due to unethical practices there. It is about to be shut down and it's about time.

http://newsfromrussia.com/news/world/20-...

Answer 8

Wow! Lets see...do prospective adoptive parents give up when trying to adopt a baby? Yes, some of them do. Is it because they are wanting a baby by any means? No, there are good-hearted people out there that are trying to adopt. The adoption system here in the USA is very long, you have to jump through hoops, sometimes. You have some adoption lawyers that not only take advantage of birth mothers but also prospective adoptive parents. Sadly you have some birth mothers and fathers that take advantage of adoptive parents. You have a foster care system that takes advantage of everyone, just because they can in some cases. There is a lot of hurt besides joy in the adoption process. So, some people look aboard so they don't have to go through all that. It's not because they are bad people, it;s just that they want a family. What needs to be looked at is Guatamala and their adoption procedures. There seems to be too many cases were both the adoptive parent and the birth mother is getting taken advantage of.

Answer 9

Julie J is dead-on!

Answer 10

I agree that the adoption process is difficult in the US.  However, it is difficult for International Adoptions also.  International adoptions actually require more paperwork and more frustration than domestic adoptions.

I've found in speaking with our friends who have adopted from China, Guatemala, and Russia, that each family chose international adoption moreso because of the fears associated with domestic adoption.  

In the US, adoptive parents worry that the bio family will change their mind once the child is born.  There is also a continuous fear that the bio family will one day show up at the door demanding their child back.  Whether it is a valid fear or not, most adoptive families do have the thought in the back of their mind.  By adopting from another country, most of these fears can be eliminated since the children are already in an orphanage and available for adoption.  While there are never any "guarantees" with adoption, because of the expenses involved, many families choose international adoption as a way to insure they will have a child.  

Getting back to the question though, I do believe that adoption is a daunting and an intrusive process both for domestic and international adoptions.  However, I believe it needs to be in an effort to protect our children.  If we did not have all of the safeguards in place, it would be our children who suffered.  Regardless of the situation, we need to insure that our children are protected.

Answer 11

Guatemala is booming in the adoption business because a bunch of corrupt adoption lawyers there have been skimming the cream off the top of American adoption dollars and procuring children using extremely unethical methods.

Adoption is "so hard" here in the U.S. because we have standards (though they need severe tightening and oversight).  Guatemala has not had much in the way of ethical standards.

What you may view as qualified prospective adoptive parents may not be qualified in the eyes of professionals who (theoretically) know what it takes to raise other people's children.  What you call "no reason" is probably very good reason.

Most adult adoptees I know (including myself) would like to see much more "daunting and intrusive" procedures in the adoption process.  Far too many unqualified people are allowed to adopt.  Many of us have suffered for it.

Adoption is not for instant gratification of people wanting children.  It's about cooperating with the people involved to ensure that you are providing an emotionally healthy and stable home for a child who needs one.