It's my birthday tomorrow and my parents are having a huge argument?

Question

It's my 16th birthday tomorrow and my parents have been fighting all day. I went out today to get away from the noise, but when i came back they were still yelling at each other. My dad even thretened to walk out and go stay with my uncle but he didn't. I'm just so upset. They've always been so happy together, then today out of the blue, all h**l let loose. What do i do on my birthday? we were supposed to be having a little party but my mum just yelled that it wasn't right. im so upset that my birthday is being ruined, selfish as it may seem. I've been looking forward to it so much and now its all ruined. my friends won't come over and we won't go out to the theme park. help, please. What do i do? im so upset. my birthday is supposed to be a happy day for the whole family, not ruined, like it is now.

Answer 1

i know that feeling...

just hope that tomorrow everyone will be in a better mood.

If it really just did happen out of the blue then it was probably just a one time argument thing.

Good luck

Answer 2

You need to tell them how you're feeling right now. As a parent we can't be selfish, especially around an important day for our child(ren). Ask them to set aside their differences and come to a compromise for you.  Let them know how it felt yo hear them say the words that they said to each other. When a person is angry, that person can sometimes say something they don't mean.. or they may ssy something that at the time don't realize has hurt someone else, or they intentionally say something to hurt another person because they are hurt and angry. None of these are good, they are harmful... it is evidence enough to see by the way that you are upset.

Tell them how you feel, it will help you to set boundaries that will come in useful later in life.

Answer 3

-They've always been so happy together, then today out of the blue, all h**l let loose.-

Wrong. They've probably had problems for awhile and you just didn't know. People don't just "out of the blue" have huge gigantic fights. There's a reason behind it.

Answer 4

you should tell them that they need to set their issues aside for one day, they could probably use the cool down! tell them that it is your birthday, and that you couldnt be happy if they didnt get along. they will probably get over it in time. and you are NOT being selfish. at all! this is your sweet 16!

Answer 5

my parents do that all the time

they have fights like this

i would just get your friends together and go do your own thing

Answer 6

After things have cooled down between them, then you need to tell them how you feel about the situation.  Try to do so without fighting and yelling with them and wait till they've calmed down from their fights (otherwise they will just get angry and upset) and I'm sure you guys can work it out.

Answer 7

Have you expressed your feelings upon your parents?

I think you should let them know how you are hurt and they should set aside their feelings til after your day of celebration.

If all h**l broke loose, that means they bottled all this up for awhile until they snapped. Parents fight, it happens; however, they don't realize the impact it has on children.

It isn't selfish of you to think of yourself.   It is a day to be celebrated of your birth, your parents should be joyous of 16 years from the day they where happy to bring you into the world. Suppose to be fun and excitting.

My 16th sucked too. Most of mine did as my family was either fighting, didn't have money or wrapped up into other's b-days (I am a week after my bro, my sister's is two weeks after mine).

let them know it is selfish and hurtful of them to be fighting on an up coming special day and to cancel the celebration because of their sour behavior towards one another.

For what it is worth, happy birthday!

Answer 8

I agree with Chelsea- parents don't just have quarrels like this which come out of nowhere. I know- I was raised in a family where there were 2 divorces and 3 remarriages before I ever turned 18, so I am a veteran of many parental battles. Your parents have probably been having issues for months, if not a year or more, Elliot, and unfortunately, it sounds as though your birthday has finally brought whatever they have been quarreling about to a head.

Your best bet is to stay out of your parents' way, and hopefully, they will resolve their differences. Your party can be postponed until a later day- there are other weekends, and in any case, it would be better to wait until this particular storm blows over before anyone celebrates anything. I am willing to bet, based on my own experiences with this kind of thing, that your parents have sort of forgotten you are there- and that your birthday is the last thing on either of their minds right now. When people are in crisis like that, they often cannot see the big picture- in fact, they have trouble concentrating on anything outside of their own pain and anger. Your parents don't mean to upset or hurt you- but they are so wrapped up in their own anger with each other that you are just on the sidelines right now. You also need to realize that your parents are fighting WITH EACH OTHER about this, and whatever the issue is, it most likely has NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. That's perhaps the hardest lesson any kid who has divorced or separated parents must learn- I struggled with it myself for several years, in fact. But once I understood this, and realized that no matter what, my parents still loved me, then their quarreling got easier to deal with. True, it still hurt when I heard them do it, but over time, I realized that since it wasn't about me, there was nothing I really could do except wait and let the storm blow over. That's what you need to do, Elliot. Your mom and dad will eventually calm down and remember that they have a child again- and when they do, they will probably both be very sorry and embarrassed- for themselves, and for you, because they caused you to miss your party. You may even get treated to something extra special, to make up for it- but what really needs to happen is that all of you need to sit and have a talk, and try to see if you can resolve whatever is going on.

Good luck, man- I feel for you, because I have been where you are. This will pass, and you will have a chance to celebrate your birthday- but perhaps not quite the way you had imagined.

Answer 9

My goodness, that's not selfish of you! 16th is supposed to be "Sweet"! You're parents are being selfish. They need to work out their problems in a less (loud) way. Perhaps they need therapy.

Definitely talk to them about it. It's not you're fault, so why should you be caught in the crossfire? Sometimes people need to set aside their problems until after a social/celebration event so others can enjoy themselves. If they won't listen, you should go out with your friends. No  matter what you should have a good time, this is a special day! It's not every day you turn 16! :P

Answer 10

Tell them like it is! To set their issues with each other asside and realize that tomorrow is YOUR day! If they care about you they should stop ruining it for you. It's the only way they are going to know how it's affecting you. Best of Luck!

Answer 11

things like this happen, best thing to do is postpone your party to another day and try to settle the dispute between your parents. Usually parents stop arguing if kids get involved cuz they don't want to fight in front of their kids or anything

Answer 12

like every one else has said tell them if they could please set their problems aside because it'sa special day for you and if that doesn't work then post-pone your birthday

hope everything works out:)

Answer 13

tell them how you feel about their arguements and ask them to try to stop at least for your special day.if not ask them for money and hang out with your friends and have fun anyway.parents have problems too dear.they are human as much as you are.but over fighting whatever on your day is totally wrong on their part!!!spankings for your parents for ruining your big day!!try to have fun anyway,good luck and happy birthday to you.

Answer 14

if youre parents are still mad tomorow go out with a couple of friends then next week have your acuall b-day party.  Happy B-day by the way