It's official: i'm socially retarted?

Question

i'm not desperate, but i always felt kinda bad that i was 14 and never had a boyfriend. I'm supposedly kind of pretty and I have a lot of guy friends so up until now i've been wondering "what's wrong with me". Also, sometimes I really like a guy until I know that he likes me back,then I don't like him anymore, it's like a game. So I figured that's why I haven't had a boyfriend yet, but I was ok with that because I thought that it was just because I never really liked the guy before and only had a crush on the guy before because I felt like I "needed" to like someone, or out of lust. This year, there is a new kid and I've liked him pretty much sense the beginning when i started talking to him. I always had a hunch that he liked me to and then tonight he finally confirmed it. I freaked out, but it's not like usual. I still like him but it feels awkward and scary. It's like now that my opportunity to have a boyfriend who I trust and really like has come, I freak out and aren't ready for a relationship anymore. I don't know what to do, I feel like this will happen for the rest of my life and I'll never get married let alone be in a relationship with a guy if I can't get over this fear of -uhmm I don't know what to call it but I guess I will say "commitment". Is this normal!?

what should i do

thanks

Answer 1

im 14 and ive had boyfriends

most of them mess with your head && it ends up in c**p

ive got a boyfriend now Matti, he's sooo sound =) but i know a few people who havent have boyfriends and their sound;)

Answer 2

hey dont feel bad. im 15 and im never even been kissed on the cheek by a guy. i had a "boyfriend" pretty much he agreed to go out with me because he thought my firned was goign to beat him up. and its not that im like ugly or anything. im 5'7 and im like 127. i play soccer and track and i have tons of firends its not like im freakiously smart or anything its just the way it is. and yeah if i could i would do anything to know if some guy would like me cause all my friends have done so much...one of them has had like 7 bfs in the summer alone and all my guys friends say im prettier, nicer and funnier than all of them. i guess its just the way it is

and then there was this one guy. i liked him for like 6 months and the second he said he liked me i stopped liking him and the day that i started liking him again he called me and siad he had a bf. yeah taht really sucks.

yeah its normal just keep working at finding a guy.

Answer 3

Wow

I feel like you just described me. Seriously. I'd love to hear answers.

You're the first one I know who's like me!!!

Answer 4

Just take it slow. Its nice to have friends. Nothing has really changed has it? You like him. You thought he liked you. You were right and he is still the same boy. Take it slow and a relationship might grow or it might fade. Just enjoy having a friend. I am the same gender as him and I promise he will not bite you;^) Just watch the kid's hands when you do go on that first date;^)  

Answer 5

The only way to get rid of you fears is to face them. If he still likes you and you like him, then go out with him. That should help you get over your fear. (I hope!)

Answer 6

First off, you say you're afraid of "commitment". How old are you? Just because you date someone doesn't mean that you'll be with them forever, and unless you are one of these people who go and makeout with a different guy every weekend, you don't really have to worry about the whole "commitment" issue.

Dating, especially in your teenage years, should be fun. If you like him, date him. If it doesn't work out, what's the harm? You shouldn't let fear get the best of you, especially fear of something that you really shouldn't be worrying about.

My best suggestion to you would be just to enjoy the time you have. You're not weird, but you are only young once. So, whether you're in a relationship or not, enjoy your youth. Be stupid, act the fool, make mistakes, sing out loud, do whatever it is that makes you happy. Ten years from now, only the important details and memories will still linger in your mind.

Good luck and don't try to grow up too fast :D

EDIT: If you can't admit to someone that you like them, the relationship isn't going to work. Communication and honesty is key in any friendship, which is what a relationship is but "set on fire".

Answer 7

You think you've got it bad? At least you know guys have had crushes on you. I'm 16, never had a boyfriend, never had a guy get a crush on me.

I really don't know how to help. If I did, I wouldn't be in the situation I'm in.

Answer 8

you're so young and shouldn't worry - you'll grow out of this most likely.

Answer 9

ha same thing happened to me, worst mistake ive ever made.