It Feels Like My Brain Is Doing the Opposite of What I Want It To Do

Question

Ever since the beginning of this year, I have been struggling immensely with mental issues. I have not sought any help, but I have been trying to figure things out on my own. I am pretty sure it started when my friend and I got in trouble with the police for smoking marijuana. After that, I sunk into a really bad Depression. I have pretty much rid myself of that for the most part, but I still don't feel good.

It feels like every time I want my brain to think something or to concentrate on something, I can't think about it. The harder I try, the worse it becomes. I've tried things like meditation and it feels like my brain is constantly pushing for me to stop concentrating.

On the opposite side, I've had images run into my head... pedophilia, incest, hurting myself... and it seems the harder I try to push them out, the more resistant they become. I know I would never act on any of those images, but they are still really disturbing to have floating around in my brain.

So, my question is... Is there something wrong with me or can I help myself by using any special techniques?

Answer 1

If it helps to know, incest isn't wrong.

Answer 2

it sounds like the pot has effected the chemical balances in your brain...i cant really explain this but can tell you that i have bi polar depression and anxiety and have had them for years the only help for me is medication for ever...you however should talk to your parents and doctor about this...there are treatments that will help besides medication but that is up to your doctor and parents...o and you should quit smoking pot if it is affecting you like this...it is turning into poison in your body..not good for you...i know u prolly didnt want to hear that but it is true...if u really want to get a healthy brain again that is where you need to start. good luck

Answer 3

I'm glad you're seeking help.  Most people think they are their mind, and you see that your brain is separate from yourself and what you want.  Good!

Yep, there's a great resource for techniques that help you not be controlled by your mind.  Eckart Tolle's book: A New Earth: awakening to your life's purpose.  Couple that with the webcast class on Oprah.com to guide you through the material.  

Answer 4

Many people have similar disturing images in their head but they don't admit it, or do not focus on it. As long as you do not act on your impluses you are ok.

The information you posted it is hard to tell what you should do.

It is possible that you are really trying to change for the better. The more you are trying the more you may feel like a failure. Give yourself time. Make yourself busy. Join the gym, get a job, pick up a few courses at college, go and volunteer. If you cannot get relief you may need to see a doctor.

You might be depressed, you might be showing some early signs of mental illness.

Answer 5

see a doctor and nip this in the bud before it gets out of hand. no one should have to feel this bad. there is help out there to get your brain chemistry back to normal. good luck to you.  

Answer 6

Cheer up!  It sounds like you are on the right track.  You should be proud of yourself for recognizing where you are and dealing with it head on.  First of all, when you get those weird feelings, go ahead and feel them and then gently release them with loving thoughts.  as you have already experienced the more you try to force them out, the more resistant they become.  

Mediitation is also a great thing.  It is simple, but not easy.  Just try sitting still for a minute or two.  Find something to concentrate on as best you can.  When you feel your mind stray, just bring it back.  

Believe me, all of us have had some sort of disturbing thoughts that have run through our minds at one time or another.  This is not necesariily a good thing, but it is far from unusual.

remember, you are the master of your mnd.  Make a choice to be happy and stick with it.  Especially when you dont feel like it,just pretend that you do.  You will feel better before you know it.

Peace and love to you.

Answer 7

The best thing is to go to a proffessional.

Good luck :)