It seems like EVERYONE is pregnant...truthfully I'm really jealous?

Question

I'm turning 26 tomorrow, and for about a year, I have been wanting to have a baby. I have been in this relationship for over a year, and I can't help but feel that this is time..

There are SO many pregnant people...I just found out today that there's another one! I must have 15 friends and coworkers that are pregnant, and it's getting to the point that I don't want to be around them. I get really sad when I see how happy they are, and want that for myself and my boyfriend.

His view is that we need to be in a better place financially, and we do plan on getting married...but it's relationships that have started, married, and gotten pregnant in the meantime that are the sore spot.

Can anyone offer words of wisdom? I know my bf has good intentions, and I'm trying OH so hard not to rush him....but it's not a good sign when I'd rather stay home to avoid seeing these people. I know it's silly and I'm trying, but...*sigh*....any words of wisdom?

Answer 1

Don't rush it. Things aren't as rosy as they seem you know. Being pregnant and being parents are two different things, once the baby comes out the magical feeling is over, as is the special treatment, the attention and feeling well rested and alive. Especially as your relationship is still relatively young I would honestly leave it for now. Your turn will come and then you will be in the position of these people you envy, by then they may have finished reproducing for good and your journey will only just be beginning : ) I wanted a second child since my daughter turned one, and watched other people have more babies while my partner wasnt ready, a year later we started trying and at the moment it's my turn to be pregnant again but I know that joy will soon come to an end and I will just have double the amount of work to do lol

Answer 2

hi, I think that is great you want to be a mother and your boyfriend who wants to marry you wants to be a father as well but is telling you just give it a little more time.

Since you both want to be parents and marry each other, I think it would be best to wait a little, get married first and let him feel like he has established some roots first.  Financially no one is ever ready but his other points make a lot of sense if ya sit back and think about it.

Your time will come my friend, like the song says your gonna miss this, your gonna want this back, these are some good times and it went by so fast you may not know it now but your gonna miss this! :)

Enjoy one another for now and your family will come when it's the right time! x

Answer 3

life is hard when you know so many people who are pregnant and did't really want to be, and you do. hard not to be jealous of them,but have to carry on as normall with them, who knows when ur day will come. when yu think of it, ur life would be alot easier if things were,like your boyfriend said, better financially,before having a baby of your own. im the same...i really want another baby, my daughter is almost three and iv been with my current boyfriend for almost a year and a half now and he says he is nt ready right now. he has two kids from a previous marriage and has to pay maintanence for them and doesnt want tp jump into having another one yet in case he ends up in the same place again,not seeing anoter child as often as he would like etc. started o understand that myself now, and even though i still want  one really badly now,i have to do whats right and wait. paranoid that i may be pregnant now cos i don't want him to resent me over it.

Answer 4

just relax! and give urself a complete break ! rejuvenate ur body n soul !

put off getting pregnant thoughts at least for the time being..

first off, prepare your mind & body by de-stressing them as stress can delay ur chances to conceive.. deep breathing can help greatly to reduce stress ... try meditating or working out (walking, jogging, aerobics, etc) whatever you feel u'll enjoy the most..

engage urself in something u’ve always wanted to do/learn in life & divert ur mind n thoughts from getting pregnant…

be positive and never give up hope..

goodluck!

Answer 5

All my life I felt like having children was what I was meant to do. I had my first child at 21, and got married when she was six months old. I gave birth to my second child at 22.

I always thought that I would have a lot of children, but after having two, I know that I won't be having anymore. I love my kids very much, but raising kids is the hardest thing I have ever done. My life has literally been put on hold. To give my children a happy life, I have forsaken my own, and you must be sure that you are ready to sacrifice your normal life if you are serious about wanting children.

Also, financially, my kids cost a lot. babies grow fast, so they need a lot of clothes. When they start to walk, they need expensive shoes that will support their feet properly. Babies also go through milk, nappies, wipes and cream on a massive scale each year. Are you going to return to work after having a baby? If so, childcare is very expensive and can make a huge hole in your salary. If you are going to be a stay at home mother, will your partners salary be sufficient to look after three people?

If you want a big wedding, my advice is to wait until after to have children, as getting married is very costly these days.

I am not trying to disuade you from having kids, but it is something that you need to thing about and discuss at length with your partner. If your mind is made up, I would suggest looking into Maternity benefits, and talk to friends and family to hear about their pregnancy and parenting experiences.