Its horrible and i dont know if i can do anything and if i can i dont know what

Question

there is a horrible problem in our house....I'm only 12 but besides the point see my parents are always fighting see my dad is a drunk and my mom always takes up or me like if my dad yells at me for something my mom will tell him to stop well I'm about to cry right now cuz they were just now arguing and my mom is like I'm over it and kept saying it and then my dad said "DONT YOU F*CKING HOLLER AT ME" and then my mom starts cussing back it is horrible i dont know what to do it makes me so sad i wish i could make my dad stop being such a @$$hole i hate it and it gets on my nerves he'll make something outta nothing plz help me

Answer 1

I've been in that situation before and it made me cry all the time b/c I didn't know what to do. There's actually nothing you can do, but to ignore it. Your parents shouldn't be behaving like that in front of you, but..parents still do it.

Just turn on your music loud so you can't hear them arguing and try to ignore it. Go outside and take a walk or keep yourself busy with something. I'm sorry you have to be in that situation..

Answer 2

sorry to be the one to break it to you hun, but life sucks

but not always, there are some really great times in life

i had pretty S****y parents myself you just have to be the best person you can be

Answer 3

callm down, yelling is not going to get u anywhere. u need to wait a bit. this argument will pass. and the tears will come. nothing u can do about that. later, after the fight has passed, when everyone is in a good mood sit down and talk to them. alright? itll do u some good. and whatever they are arguing about, idk. but if they dont let up the first time u talk to them and they just get angry at u u just need to keep ur cool and then talk to them again another time. u need to be strong. and patient. thats all that i can say. other than that, u need to figure out ur own problems.  

Answer 4

A bible does NOT cure an alcoholic.  Your dad is allowing alcohol to make him a person that he is not.  People who drink can become very mean.  You can't fix your parents.  You CAN'T stop your dad from drinking.  Non of that is your responsibility.

Try talking to your mom when your dad is not around and tell her how you feel.  

Just to reiterate, YOU CANNOT STOP your dad from drinking.  YOU CANNOT help him...he can only help himself.

Answer 5

Darling, its okay. One of my best friends had this exact same problem. I was over at her house one night when the fighting started and this is what we did:

we climbed out onto the rooftop (because he was threatening to beat down the door) and we called 9-1-1 (the cops) and then we told them that somebody was harassing us and abusing us and threatening us. The police got there really fast.

If you are too afraid to call the police, go to someone you trust and ask them to call. Like call them, ask them to tell the police and just leave it to them.

And if you don't want to do either, run away. For a night. To a friends house, preferably. Or to a school. Nobody will ever harm you at a school. Dont know why. But the running away will sober him up pretty fast.

I feel so sorry for you. Maybe if he faces the consequences, he'll learn. I hope you don't end up like either of your parents. You deserve so much better.

~Lurve,

MJ

Answer 6

I'm sorry about your situation. when the water stops boiling, i'd sit your father down and explain to him how the fighting makes you feel. & while you're at it, tell him that he needs to get his drinking problem under control because it feels as thought it is tearing the family apart.

But for one:

you are 12 years old, you should not be using words like a*****e.

and start using punctuation. it was tough for me to understand what you were saying at some points.

Answer 7

Girl not even i know what to do.... im sorry

Answer 8

Tape him ,he may not realize what an a$$hole he is being.Im sure the next day all is forgivin and everyone is walking on eggshells but if he really hears himself it may make a difference.good luck..

Answer 9

it might take more time and patience on your part than you think you can handle. however, your dad is totally defenseless against prayer. try it persistantly.pray from your heart. my suggestion is to pray good things for him and ask to God see you through this tough time. blessings to you.

Answer 10

The only advice I have is to pray.  turn to God. That is what I always do if something is going wrong in my life.  Put all your worries on God and he will always protect you.  He is your true father and he will never let you down.  Pray for your parents as well. Trust me, it will make you feel better.

Answer 11

I know exactly where you're coming from. When I was younger my parents used to do the same thing...my dad was drunk all the time, and we just seemed to be in his way. I was the one though that used to go lock myself in my room crying because I thought the reason they were arguing was because of me. I realize now that it didn't do any good for me to hide out. My parents got divorced 9 years ago when I was 10, and since then I've been fatherless and I miss all the times I should have had with my dad. I suggest that you talk to them one on one and tell them how you really feel. Although, after my parents got divorced I started going to a family counselor and told her everything, and was able to be myself, and it was kept confidential. You wouldn't believe how much it helped me.

Answer 12

Oh my goodness you poor child.  I am so sorry for what you are having to witness.  Just know that it IS NOT YOUR FAULT.  You are the child and they are the parents, though they may not be acting like it.  Just try to avoid the situations, if there is something that you do/say that angers your dad, avoid doing/saying it.  Just keep to yourself when he is drunk and know that i am praying for you!  Keep your head up, and dont let yourself grow up too fast, its a shame, life is too short to begin with.

Answer 13

Call up your relatives? Tell them you're sick of seeing your parents fight, and ask if you can live with them for a while maybe?

I'm so sorry this is happening for you..

Answer 14

Sweetheart...I'm so sorry to hear this.    I suggest you talk to an adult that you trust.... You need to get a 3rd party involved because this is abuse and it can escalate.  

My heart aches for you and I really wish you the best...

Answer 15

sorry your stuck in this situation. it sucks cuz there really isnt anythin you can do. i ran away for 2 reasons 1 to get away..2 maybe they will realize how bad it hurts [im 14,been happening since i was about 9-10] but it didnt work. i would say the best thing you can do is sit down with them [[when they are calm]] and talk it out. if you have the money go to family counciling. if you have a hard time talking with your parents write it. [[i do]] communication is what works best [[doesnt matter what form its in]]

i really hope ive helped and im terribly sorry for your situation cuz i know it sucks.

if you need some one to dish it out to you can message me anytime!!

Desiree

Answer 16

Would it be possible to stay with grandparents or friends for a while?

If so, do that, and call your father (when you are away from him)

and let him know why you had to leave, let him know he's hurting you.

Let him know you love him, but you dont feel comfortable in your own home.

You deserve a good life darling. Karma will help you out.

Answer 17

rember how bad you feel and when you have kids never make them feel like that.     ( Maby go hand your dad a bible )

Answer 18

You need to have a talk with your mother about how her and her relationship with your father is making you feel. She needs to get counceling for herself and couples counceling for her and her husband and she needs to put you in counceling as well.

If your father won't go to counceling then maybe ur mom should divorce him since he doesnt want to make his marriage work.

Good Luck!

Answer 19

Awwww that's bad, you need to see a councilor before bad c**p happens, seriously. huggles