Its what he said that really gets to me!!!?

Question

My female colleague and i were discussing weddings and I was saying how I personally prefer a small wedding, with just a few close family members and friends. Then my male colleague buts into the conversation asking what we were talking about, so we told him. I was explaining how its pointless to have a big wedding and then 4-5 years down the road you're arguing wiv ur partner constantly and all that wedding expense has been wasted on a c**p marriage. Then what really surprised me was what he said afterwards. He says: "Well, just don't get married then." This really surprised me quite a bit because he has never spoken to me like this before. Why would he give a good friend advise like that? I really don't get him. He has never been negative about anything I say. He agrees with most of the things I mention, so I don't know why he's giving me such ill advise all of a sudden. He knows that I want to get married in the future and start a family as well. He also knows that I've been seeing a guy that I met online and we are really hitting it off. Why is he so unsupportive lately?

Answer 1

Maybe he was just speaking his mind.  He doesn't have to agree with everything you say.  This shows that he's actually listening instead of just agreeing all the time.

Or maybe he was just in a bad mood. xD

Answer 2

I think he likes you and is jealous  

Answer 3

He has expressed his opinion. It is good advice. He is a true friend. He knows your situation. Marriage is a big step.

Answer 4

to me, it sounds like he is mad about something. tell him that ur kinda surprised. just talk to him. oh, and also, i'd prefer a smallis kinda wedding. =)

Answer 5

Its just his opinion.

He is entitled to it.

Answer 6

I don't think he is giving you  'ill advise'. If you believe that your marriage will break sdowdowner 5 years and 'all that wedding expenses will be wasted on a c**p marriage' you should not be going ahead with it, you are obviously having doubts and don't feel it will last. if you are going into it with this mind set you will never survie all the stresses and strains of married life and shouldn't bother.

He's right. lastly friends don't just say what you want to hear they sometimes have to say what you have to hear

Answer 7

Well, first of all he didn't give you advice, he gave you an opinion. Second of all, if you feel so pessimistic about marriage I gotta agree with him: why get married at all if you believe its gonna end in divorce 5 years down the line anyways? Doesn't matter whether you have a small or big wedding, you sound like someone who subconsciously doesn't belive its gonna last with that guy your with.  

Answer 8

thats jelousy if ever i saw it! he was totally jelous, thinkoing you are going to get married to this internet man and have a small wedding, and talk of a wedding reminded him of the fact you have a close male friend and this got him jelous. prehaps he invisages you and him having a big wedding and you just burst that bubble for him so now he's upset.