Joining the military and leaving hubby with our 2 kids - need advice?

Question

i'll be going away to Basic training soon and will be leaving my husband with our 4 yr old and 2 yr old... my husband works full time so we will need daycare for them mon-fri... but it is normal for me to be worried about leaving our children for so long?

I have confidence in my husband and he is wonderful with the kids but at the same time i'm worried about the little things like making sure their teeth are brushed properly, cleaning behind the ears, eating enough fruit and veg... how am i going to cope while being away and not worry about if things are going smoothly at home and if my hubby is ok being alone?

My family live in another country and his family is about 7 hrs away.

Has anyone ever done this or have any advice on how we can get through this?

Answer 1

were a military family. and i think all moms worry about being away from there kids and if the father can take care of them like us but itll be ok. dads have there own routine and ways and they can handle it if they want so try not to worry your not the only one going through it so just stay strong. remeber that there waiting for you as that basic and ait will be over before you know it. at this time getting through basic is what you need to focus on. good luck!

Answer 2

If you are unsure about how he is going to handle the day t day tasks of raising the kids while you're gone, then you need to sit down with him beforehand and find out how he really feels he'll be able to do without you there.  Perhaps establishing a checklist for him to follow before you leave so he can mentally go through it each day until everything on it becomes habit for him.  And have him handle much of the routine before you leave and you focus on just spending time with your family before you leave.

Only you truly know your husband best and you'll understand what he'll need the most help with.  Have faith in him, he agreed to let you join the service, so he feels confident in being able to do what's necessary to make that happen for the whole family.

Answer 3

It is very normal to be worried when leaving your children for any length of time!  Mothers will always worry, even if leaving them with Daddy!!

1st of all, I think that it is great that you are choosing to serve your country.  My husband and I both served in the Army and that is where we met.

We have 2 sets of twins and I travel for work.  Every time I leave them I worry about things like if they are getting enough veggies, if they are brushing thier teeth, if my husband is combing thier hair...crazy stuff!!!

I really had to just realize that no one will do things exactly the way I would and the most important thing was that they were taken care of and loved (I had to tell myself it was OK that Daddy takes them to McDonalds...cuz at least he was feeding them :D )

The longest I was away from my kids was when I was pregnat with my last set of twins, I spent a little over 3 months in the hospital.  It was hard and I missed them.

The best way to cope and get through it is to talk to your hubby and children about what to expect, create a plan, realize that your hubby will not doing everything the same way that you do but come to an understanding about the big things, and try to trust your husband to care for your children.....I know it is easier said than done.

The good thing for me is that when I returned, my husband had a whole new appriciation for what I did caring for the children.

When boot camp gets tough, think about your children and your husband!  Try to imagine a silly scenerio that he may be having to deal with...it might make you laugh!!!

Good luck!!!

It is very hard to leave your children for any length of time

Answer 4

When I joined the military and went to basic I was quite surprised to see how many moms that were in basic and left their kids at home. many of them missed their families greatly (to be expected) but the truth is in basic you will barely even have time to worry about anything. Believe me when you are in basic you don't even get enough time to sleep, shower or eat let alone think about anything other then what the drill instructors are screaming at you. my best suggestion is to make sure your husband knows all the basics and be comfortable with that. you have to make sure that you are comfortable with the arrangements when you leave because it is hard enough to deal with the stress of boot camp and then be worrying about everything at home. have confidence that your husband will do things right (guys can be pretty great when they have no choice) and just try to be as calm as possible from there. good luck