Jokes about the football team the Dolphins?

Question

my friend and I were talking about football, and he loves the dolphins. And he keeps teasing me because I don't like them. I was wondering if anyone knew any funny jokes about football......preferably about the Dolphins that I could tell him to get back at him?

Answer 1

Here's one. When the Coach left last season he went to buy a mini mart franchise. But the deal fell through when the Company wouldn't let him change the name to 0-11!

Answer 2

Dan Marino has a special place in my heart, although mostly because when I was young I associated him with Mario. On a side note, I would love to see a Mario-themed football game. Nintendo, if you're listening..

EDIT: How many Dolphins does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change the light bulb, two to carry him away, and one to replace him in the lineup.

How do you keep a Miami Dolphin out of your yard? Put up goal posts.

What do Billy Graham and the Miami Dolphins have in common? They make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ"

What's the difference between the Miami Dolphins and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar.

What do possums and the Miami Dolphins have in common? They play dead at home and get killed on the road.

What's the safest place in Miami during a tornado? Dolphins Stadium, they never get a touchdown there.

The Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following along, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to the fallen dwarfs. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, "The Miami Dolphins are Super Bowl contenders."

Snow White thought to herself, "Thank God... at least Dopey survived!"

Answer 3

The biggest joke about the Dolphins is . . . .

The Dolphins.  1 win - 15 losses.

It's not really funny, I guess, it's kinda sad.  But if you are an afficiando of Schadenfreude (look it up) - then the Dolphins are the team for you.

Answer 4

I am a hardcore Dolphins Fan, but realized they sucked last year.  It was a terrible year in the NFL for Dolphin fans.  Not only did we almost go winless, but a team almost went undefeated.

Any jokes about Ricky Williams are good like

What was Ricky Williams signing bonus?  A dime Bag

Whats Ricky Williams favorite play?  A sack

How do you keep the Dolphins off your lawn?  Paint it like an endzone

  

Answer 5

Um... How bout you tell him to shut his mouth, the Dolphins only won 1 game last year!

Answer 6

Police, the National Guard, and the FBI were called out to Dolphin Stadium this week.  Players on the field reported seeing a strange, white substance on the field that they had never seen before.  Miami CSI took samples and determined that the substance did not come from anthrax or ricin,  It was, instead, a Goal Line.

A small boy was spotted by police in Dade County, Florida carrying his belongings tied in a bandana on a stick over his shoulder.  Instantly recognizing the boy as a runaway, the officer told him to get in the car and would take him home to his dad.

"Oh no, please don't do that.  My mom and I left dad because he beats me."

So the police officer offered to take him home to his mom.

"Oh no, please don't do that.  My mom beats me, too!" the boy cried.

The officer was perplexed.  "Well where should I take you then?"

"Take me to Dolphin Stadium.  I know the Dolphins don't beat anybody."