Just cant do it anymore?

Question

I have been ill with depression and panic attack for almost a year now. I have been going the Doctors since a became ill, My doctor is great, but still almost 9 months on I'm still ill and feeling worse,today i just want to end everything i cant carry on anymore with the mental pain that i have inside me.

I have a boyfriend that one min is great with me the next hes shouting at me when i'm trying to be nice to him, I love him but i need to get better and i don't think that my boyfriend screaming at me is helping. The trouble is i have been telling my boyfriend that i want to split as i need to sort my head out but, It's my house and he refuses to move out and go back to hes family.

I don't know what else i can do i feel so low i cant do this anymore hes due home from work in couple of hours and i've had 4 panic attacks as i know that its going to be rows again.

10 minutes ago - 3 days left to answer.

Additional Details

1 minute ago

I would move anyway from him but, its my house not his, my morgage.

Answer 1

WTF, look girl you need to show him that you are not afraid of him, call the police on him, he is using you because you get scared and don't stand up for your self, call the po po and clear your head, see a new doctor, LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL, you can make the worst of life or you can make the best of it too, it just takes time and just get thru deppression, its not easy but don't give up on it, your boyfriend sounds like a ****** ***** mutha fucka to me, call the cops on him and get help........

Answer 2

Well you have to evict him since he lives there.   See my wife suffers from panic attacks and if theres no problem then she tries to find one.  She worries about the littles things to the point it stress's me out.  I help her through the panic attacks and comfort her and talk to her about them.

But if its similar to what im going through i can feel his frustration.  But i wouldnt stay somwhere i wasnt wanted.

Answer 3

I think you are too weak to deal with his abuse and bullying right now.  You have to think of yourself first and get a break and a rest for a week or two before you have the strength to tell him to move out.  If you have a family member or friend to turn to for a week or two, or the money for a motel, then do that for a retreat to gather your strength.  When you come back or call him in two weeks, tell him it is over, and mean it.  He will respect you more when you are dealing from a position of strength.  Don't buy into him taking advantage of your weakness.  Go from a position of strength.

Answer 4

Try telling him it's just that you want some time alone and it's not splitting up. If he doesn't agree to go away for a while and give you the space you need, pack his bags while he's out at work, get the locks changed and leave his bags on the doorstep. DON'T answer the door, no matter how much he shouts and pleads. Stay in your room until he goes away. If he gets aggressive or tries to break in, call the police and get them to warn him off.

You need your own space to get your life back together and it sounds like he's just bringing you down, maybe even the cause of your illness.

Answer 5

4 your sake honey PLEASE...tell him you need your space and time to think, because he is not helping you cope with any of your problems...it sounds like he may have some problems of his own that he needs to work out before continuing a relationship with you! Good luck and i will pray for u.  

Answer 6

If you ask him to leave, which is your right, and he refuses you can either call the Police to remove him, or take legal action to remove him.

Contact Citizen's Advice for fuller details on your rights and options

good luck

Answer 7

First of all you gotta get this guy out of your house, I don't think he can be considered as your boyfriend if he is bugging you and making you feel uncomfortable, if he is refusing to leave call the police and force him to move. He sure won't be helpful to you about your current condition.

Is there anyone family member or a friend that you can trust and can support you? If there is call them and ask either you moving in them or get them moving in to you.

Best of luck I feel for you and I hope you can solve your problems as soon as possible.

Answer 8

It's your house and so you have legal right to get him out. If he refuses, call the police. It doesn't sound like he's very good for you and maybe you would be better off out of the relationship. Are you seeing a psychiatrist? I think you should go back to your doctor and explain what you've said here. Maybe you would benefit from CBT or something similar, ask your doctor.

Answer 9

Honey, you need to get proactive, if he won't leave as you request, you get yourself down to the local court house, have them help you get a restraining order, once you have that, it's a simple thing to call the police and have them remove him from the premises, if he won't go then, he will be arrested for breaking the restraining order.  Arrange for a day or two to stay with a friend, or if you must get a hotel, so the police can bring him back for his belongings.  If you are smart, once they have removed him, you should pack up his things and have them ready by the door.. that way he won't be taking anything that is not his.

You definitely do not need such an abusive person around you right now.  In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he is the reason for your depression and panic.

Answer 10

Well, your health should come first before anything else. The way you describe your boyfriend, it sounds a little like mental abuse to me. I congratulate you for asking him to move out, but if he refuses there is nothing you can do, unless the house is in your name.Since you say that the house is in your name and not his you may be able to force him out. I would call a lawyer or even ask a family member.

Answer 11

Ask him to leave and tell him it's over. When he refuses tell him you will call the cops if he does not start packing and get out by tonight. That is that. Then if he doesn't CALL THE POLICE! You aren't going to get better if you have someone negative around you alot.

Answer 12

Go back to that doctor and ask for some meds, if you're not taking any. That will lift your depression.

As for your bf see a lawyer and have him evicted.I had to that with my ex. Tell your bf what you intend to do if he won't leave voluntarily. That might get him to go.

And believe me he's not worth getting panic attacks over. There WILL be an end to to this, honestly.

Answer 13

Clear your head by doing something you enjoy whether it's walking,reading, or just whatever is your favorite way to relax.By doing this it helps you escape for a little while from life's everyday problems and sometimes the answers will come easier by not dwelling on them.

Answer 14

Since it's your house and you can't leave.  You may have to...

1. Get a lock smith and have the doors re-keyed for all entry points.

2. Get a family member or a good friend to be with you when you again ask him to leave.

3. File a report with the police.

Whatever you do, make sure you have someone there with you to support you.

Answer 15

call the cops. be final, not flakey. you'll feel better about yourself instantly, because, you will have control of your own life. he can't stay there if you don't want him to. and you will feel helpless to win you inner battle if you can't take control of something that is plainly in your control.

tell him to go. don't think about it. just do it. if he refuses, call the cops. if he hurts you, press charges. you have a very real ally, here. use it. the pain of loss will eventually become clear to you as just the fear of change and you will be able to at least see you can control some things. that will be a great first step in controling the depression and anxiety.

Answer 16

You need to chuck him out and this is how.

Give him one month to move out and if he hasn't moved out, then you need to get some friends in, and I mean men.  Call on cousins or brothers, or if you have none, someone from work who has an air of authority.  Change the locks while he's at the pub or something call a locksmith and say its an emergency.  That is how serious it really is, trust me.

Also move all of his possesions onto the kerb/front lawn and don't let him into the house ever again.

Don't feel guilty, don't give him anything, he brought it on himself.