Just caught my son looking at pornography!?

Question

I started hearing strange noises coming from his room, so I quietly opened the door, and there he is, masturbating to anime p**n. I threw the door open and screamed "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?". He threw his hands on the keyboard, trying to shut the p**n off, but it was too late. I just finished spanking him and I've taken away his computer privileges. He's grounded for the rest of the time he's living in my house. Is there anything else I should do?

Answer 1

um he's 12, dont be so hard on him, he has hormones, just like everyone else, and kids do start doing things early now adays do to the hormones they put in meats. he's pretty much almost a teenager, do u plan on spanking him when he first has s*x as well? let the poor boy be. atleast he's not out there having s*x already. and thats discusting that u opened his door while he was doing that, u should have walked away and talked to him about what u seen later on.

Answer 2

thtas a little harsh..hes a man what do you think they do

Answer 3

BA HA HA HA!!how old is hee???  why did u spank him?

Answer 4

lol  if you are silly enough to let a young boy have the Internet in his bed room with out any supervision wot do you expect ????????? as for master bating why did you hit him for it ,,, its a very normal thing to do ,,, the kid will end up fxxxx up leave him find out   for him self

Answer 5

Definitely make sure he does not have access to the internet in his room like that, there are a lot more dangerous things on the internet than anime. As for the other, you really don't want to spank or punish him severely for that. He could wind up with some emotional issues surrounding s*x. Make sure he knows the punishment is for abusing your trust with the computer. You may want to do some research on internet safety as well. Let his dad or some other male role model talk to him about s*x.

Answer 6

Rofl. Just rofl. If you're not joking, that's just crazy.

Answer 7

No computer in his room. It's unwise to allow him to have access in a place where he's alone.

Look in to accountablity programs. They will automaticly send you an email with the list of every web sight he went to.

Oh his computer make him a standard user and make your self an administrator. Grounding him for 6 years isn't going to help. You have to try and teach him reasponablity, get him hooked up woth good male mentors along with keeping dad in the loop. Make itknow that it is not acceptable and WHY. Then hold him accountable. Keep his computer in a living space... where you can walk by at any second and see whats on the computer screen.

I have two teens in my house and we have four computers - i made sure that the two teens computers were put in the living room, i have a lap top and i can see their screens from where i sit.

Also, no computer after a certain hour. Darkness makes it more tempting. Don't go to bed and leave him up and on the computer.

because p**n is something that  lot of women fear their husbands will get in to, my father did something i thought was cool. He commited to keep his computers in visasble places, my mom has access to every thing, AND he never goes on the computer if shes asleep. He did this because he respects her and loves her and wants to ensure she has no reason to fear. She didn't even hacve to ask him to do this. I thought it was awesome!

I would say 12 is a little old for spankings personaly.

Answer 8

Well it is better to have him masterbating than having s*x right?

I think all boys grow up looking at p**n at some point in their life.

Let him know it is a private thing but its going to happen no matter what you say.

Answer 9

it is perfectly normal for a teenager to do that (if he is of course) but there is no need to hit him. Maybe you just need to talk about it

Answer 10

If I were him, I'd get out of that house as soon as I could. First off, it is ridiculous to spank a 12 y.o., second, every guy does it. You are a sad excuse for a human being.

Answer 11

You need to tell us how old he is! If he is in his teens then that perfectly normal and YOU DONT SPANK A TEENAGER!

Edit: Was the p**n on his computer or on a disk (DVD, CD-ROM, etc.?) But either way that is normal as the hormones are raging at that age desparate to learn about s*x.

Answer 12

yeah, get over it. he's going to m********e more the older he gets. why didn't you knock on his door anyway? you could have saved the both of you a lot of embarrassment

Answer 13

OMG your insane !!!

its NORMAL for a boy to look at p**n !~!

theres nothing wrong with mastubation !! its healthy

Answer 14

Next time knock before you go into his room,

and then you won't have this problem.

Kids need privacy and come on pal,

we all were kids at one time and did the same thing,

but maybe not on a computer.. but how many copies

of Playboy or Penthouse did you hide from your parents?

Answer 15

I know that had to be a bad experience for both of you, but masturbation is a completely normal/natural thing. It is not something you should punish him for. He probably needs to be given "the talk" though. He needs to be educated about all things s*x, in order to make informed decisions in the future. GL!

Answer 16

ummmm how old is he? I dont see why he should be punished for doing something that is natural...next time u should knock before entering, everyone needs their privacy. How would u like it if he just walked into ur room while u were having s*x, with out knocking or anything...c'mon, be realistic...

Answer 17

its normal and natural for a teen to do it its nothign they should be punished for its part of growing up i bet you did it when you where growing up sooner or latter he will eventualy do it again its how he learns about stuff

Answer 18

No matter how much u feel like u should punish him he really wasn't doing anything abnormal. Instead of telling him he is doing something wrond u should sit down and talk to him about his body and s*x. No matter how old or young he is all he is doing is touching his own body. He is not harming anyone or himself. Most children begin masturbating at birth. They just don't know exactly what they are doing except that they derive pleasure from it. Ur son is obviously in the midst of puberty and making him feel ashamed of his body and his feelings is only going to hurt him. Mastubation is natural. I would encourage him to be open with you and himself. Our reproduction is linked with sexual pleasure, y do u think that is because our very exsistence depends on procreation. Also takin away his computer priviliges is just about impossible based on the way schools are now. Also this may just push him to look @ these things @ school where they are not appropriate. Lets not pretend to be so agahst at his behavior. Some one had their p***s in ur v****a or vice versa or else u wouldn't have a son. The real danger in childhood sexuality is  a lack of knowledge.

Answer 19

OMG how embarrising to be caught by ur mom and if your a boy.

Poor kid!

I say stay out of it and leave it to his dad, tell his dad to educate him about it.

Answer 20

how old is he? you know adolescents are curious about their bodies especially when hormones are kicking in. now is a good time for the birds and the bees chat if he has not already had it. out of curiosity are you more upset about the p**n or masterbating? you can start by safe guarding your computers so no inapprpriate things can be viewd. he is probably embarrased right now, but he will come around

Answer 21

I think you've overreacted a bit and you need to have a serious talk with him.  Hitting him won't make him stop whacking off.  He'll find other ways. He's almost a teenager(some would consider him a teenager).

Masturbation is perfectly normal and while looking at p**n(even animated p**n) isn't what you WANT your 12 year old son to be doing, hitting him won't change his mind about it.

Answer 22

Get over it! Its natural and normal. What kind of parent are you spanking your child for doing something entirely natural?!

Answer 23

Regardless of what you may think, that's very harsh punishment to give your 12-year-old son. At that age, you'd better get used to him masturbating regularly. Keep in mind that you should always knock and wait for an answer before entering his room to give him his privacy. Would you rather he m********e alone, or go out all the time having s*x with tons of girls? Which one sounds safer? My point exactly. Besides, it's his body and his hormones. I'm sure you've looked at some type of p**n before, too. Loosen up a bit, I'm sure he's embarrassed enough to have been caught by his own mother without the added punishment.

Answer 24

He's 12 and guess what...he has realized that this is fun. As for viewing the p**n..maybe it's time to put a blocker on the home computer to block such items out. BUT, unfortunately in today's society he is going to see this other places.

Maybe you or your husband should talk with him and let him know that it's okay to "be curious". You would hate for him to clam up now (at such a young age) and start going to REAL GIRLS / WOMEN and other friends to start learning and exploring this experience.

I'm sure you are as embarrassed as he is and not sure how to approach this subject. I truly believe you need to open the discussion up and go to him and explain that p**n on the computer is against the law for him. Also, remember he is 12 and this is definitely time to start letting him know you are there for him to talk with about this type of stuff. It's tough being a kid!

Good luck

Answer 25

That's Harsh!

Answer 26

Honestly I would think it's time to sit down and have that "talk".  Maybe let him know that p**n may be fun now, but not in your house!  That masturbating is normal, but you don't want him to grow up and become one of those p**n addicts that has no life!  You want him to grow up and respect s*x and women, and sadly p**n does the opposite.

  I wouldn't spank him though.  In our house the spanking cut off is 11.  Grounding maybe?  I think the biggest thing is to keep open the line of communication.  He's close to being a teen, and if you want him to talk to you, it's up to you to keep it open.  I can guarantee you he is MORTIFIED right now.  Chances are whatever you caught him looking at he's seen 50 times already at school or with friends.  If you don't want him to do things, having HIM make that decision because it's right is way more effective than you making it for him against his will.  He will just rebel and then you'll have no say in anything in his life.