Just found out my bf is married. told me hes not happy with his marriage. what will i do?

Question

Just found out my bf is married. told me hes not happy with his marriage. what will i do?

Answer 1

I think this guy is so fickle-minded. One moment he broke up with you to get married to another girl. The next moment, he says he's not happy with his marriage. If I'm you, I will ignore your ex-boyfriend. I think he is toying with girls' feelings. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

Break it off. Please!

Answer 3

Oh my word...uh, leave??

Details dont matter, he has BAD character.  Your situation is not unique or special.  He is a bad husband, bad boyfriend and you dont have the power to change that. Sorry.

Answer 4

The issue is this, do you love him? Forget if he has so called bad character or other flaws that don’t fit a middle class stereotype, this is just people living in an ideal world, life for some people is hard and as a result they make mistakes. You need to cool things a little until he is divorced, if he is genuine he will understand this reasonable request from you. If he gets a divorce as he says he wants to, then its up to you to judge if you want to marry this person or not as the case may be. First thing is he needs to conclude his current relationship though.  

Answer 5

Get out now! You could be wife the in a few years. Once a player always a player.

Answer 6

He could be lying, he could be an abusive husband. I am not saying he is, but imagine the worse case scenario. There are more sides to this than his: his wife's. I always hated the thought of cheaters yapping to their lovers instead of trying to fix it or step out of it.

You do not know if he is lying or not. Tell him to tell his wife the complaints he has been voicing to you. He should either fix it or get divorced. But gossipping? Please, if it is so bad he can get a divorce, after that he can spill his guts.

Edit: A friend of mine her husband cheated on her with different women. She sometimes even knew who: she did not want to leave him as she had a baby with him and still loved him. But being looked at hatefully by your husband's mistress and knowing that he complains (she overheard conversations on the phone) and does not tell the whole story: very painful. After ten years she finally left him.

Answer 7

well what a lie i feel he a user and a cheat,it his wife i feel sorry

Answer 8

Really? He is not happy with his marriage? Tell his wife what he said.  

Answer 9

I think should look about your future, what i mean is, don't get involve into it because you will find yourself trouble and make your life miserable about this relationship. If you get together with him then after that he find another girl again how?  

Answer 10

I am so sorry for what you are going through.  I have just gone through the same.  Chances are he does not love his wife and is unhappy in his marriage.  Hello all those wives who bashed you!  He is cheating on her after all isnt he!  But I do feel he never left when he was unhappy.  He never left when he found you.  He never left when he had the guarentees that you love him and would stand by him, so I guess you are heading for heartbreak in hoping he will stand by you in the long run.  I know its hard.  I have just gone through the same thing.  My guy did leave his wife when I found out he was married and she wants to work things out.  He has not gone home up til now. (6 mnths on) but says he isnot ready for divorce.  When the crunch and reality comes many men realise they love their wives after all, or do not have the back bone to divorce and stay for more years of unhappiness and cheating for fear of losing the security and assets they have built.  For your own survival, do not live in hope until he signs papers as you donot deserve the continued heartache and it will take you even longer to start the process of recovery.  Its been a year of h**l for both me and his wife.  I would not wish this on anyone.  Good luck x and please please take care of yourself.

Answer 11

Walk away, he's just using you as a bit on the side, of course he says he's unhappy, he wouldn't say otherwise.Dont let yourself be used.

Answer 12

I know that it is painful, but truly you must end this relationship. My mother was with a married man for 6 years waiting for him to end his marriage. He finally did, and at that time he broke thing off with my mother as well, saying he needed to be by himself for a change.

This man is cheating on his wife. That makes him a cheater. A cheater, by definition cheats. He will cheat on you, too.

Best of luck.

Answer 13

Stop seeing him until he gets divorced.  Then decide since he lied once will he lie again.

Answer 14

I have a friends have the same problem she found out that her husbands cheating on her so she ask him to decided who he want to spent the rest of his life with,between her and the other women, so he should her. So I think your case he never going to live his wife for you. I bet the wife don't know any thing about this for sure.  

Answer 15

He is a liar my dear so please just leave him en dont thin ur better than his wife he was just using u en jhe loves his wife so much tha he is with her everyday en married her

Answer 16

He will never leave his wife. Your a homewreacker! If you stay with him your dumb He and his wife will end someday and you will get cheated on if he marrys you! Move on you deserve a guy that loves you and only you and a guy that you wont have to share!

Answer 17

you can either:

1) accept it and lose your self respect and risk him cheating on you too, plus being the selfish person that you probably are that ruins other people's marriages.

2) make him take a decision, either be a man and confront his wife  while you put ur relationship on hold until he fully ends his marriage, which can take months and months or end your relationship. you'll know for sure if he loves you, and you will live with the freedom of doubts and the reassurance of his love to you.

3) REVENGE: dump him after using him and ruinning his marriage by telling his wife and warning her from him. you'll feel powerful and you'll teach the bast ard a lesson and you'll save that woman half the heartache.

The choice is yours.

Answer 18

hahah.. THAT old chestnut... he just wants s*x... if he was unhappy in his marriage, he'd leave... he's found a sucker, and he's using you...

Answer 19

What the h**l you are thinking?? If he is married then you are not his gf but his MISTRESS. Just break off with him and carry on with your own life! You wont die w/o a F**KER like him.

Answer 20

Sure he is not happy, but he married his wife, he sleeps and has s*x with her.

Just ignore him...forever...he only wants your @ss.

Answer 21

What do you do? You realise that this man has cheated on his marriage, cheated on his wife, and lied to you too. You realise that this man isn't any good, and is certainly not honest. You let him go. That's if you value yourself.  

Answer 22

I'd call his wife and tell her what a jerk her husband is.

I hope you are smart enough to dump this cheater.

Being unhappy is a good excuse to get a divorce, it's not a good excuse to cheat on your spouse. If he will cheat on a woman he is married to, then he will cheat on you too.

Answer 23

OH NO, very difficult decision.. If you loves him, you ought to have a good chat with him.  Ask him if he is serious about you and if he is going to divorce his wife.  If negative answer, you should leave him, rather then suffering. Good luck.

Answer 24

Depends on what you need/want from him.

Do you want him all to you? If so i would say you need to pose the ultimate um of me or her.

Being a man, i know several men who cheat regularly on their wives and say how they despise them, but would never ever leave them.

My advice would be to find another man if you are looking for a long term relationship.  

Answer 25

he is not your boyfriend, he is another womans WIFE!!

Answer 26

They ALL say they are not happy in their marriage, but most of them really do not want to do anything to end their marriage.  They are getting free stuff from you and that is all they want - give him the boot as if you become his wife, YOU will be the one sitting at home waiting for him to come home.  

Answer 27

Leave the deceitful man. He led you to believe he was single which was wrong to begin with. He is the type of man that wants to have the cake and eat it too. He will tell you he is unhappy in his marriage, and that you are the girl he really wants to be with, and then he will stay with his wife. He will waste your time making promises he has no intentions of keeping. You are much better off leaving and doing it now!

Answer 28

They all say they're not happy with their wives when they want some action on the side.

Don't trust him.

Most men lie and say they are leaving or have left just so they can get the best of both worlds.

Don't be taken for a mug.

Answer 29

Same old story....."i'm married, but i'm not happy"....he will never leave his wife....believe me !!! You need to be the one who walks away..

Answer 30

Let the big a**hole suffer. Take a long hike and stay gone.

I hope to heck that you are not preggers.

Answer 31

All married men, that cheat, say that!!!  I have heard that line so many times, that I can tell when it is going to come out of a man's mouth now!!!  They will tell you anything to get into your pants, including "I love you".  Don't believe the BS.  They just want some strange stuff, and it makes it easier if it is already available on the side, rather than to have to find some every time they want it.  Eventually he will get tired of you and cheat with someone else too.  This story is as old as marriage!!!  Some men just refuse to commit to one woman.  They have to prove their manhood every time their p***s gets hard!

Tell him that if he is dishonest about being married, how can you trust him.  Besides, he cheated on his wife, what makes you think that he won't cheat on you too???  Believe me, cheating shows a lack of moral character, but then to lie to you about being married too!!!  Two HUGE red flags!!!  This man is nothing but trouble.  Don't waste the young years of your life on a cheating liar!  You can't get those years back once you have squandered them.