Question:

Just need some advice.?

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My friend started going out with a real creep a few months ago, I already had feelings for her when she did, so I just pushed it to the back of my mind and tried to move on. I found this girl and talked to her a bit, I didn't like her all that much, but I figured maybe I would grow in to it. She broke up with that guy because she realized they had nothing to talk about, and because he was overall just a weird person.

After that happened, all these feelings came rushing back, and I ended up telling her one day how I felt, and she said she was surprised, and that she liked me as well, but she acknowledged the relationship I was currently in, and as did I. My relationship was not going over well anyway, so I broke up with her and told the girl I liked beforehand what I was doing.

One thing I noticed was that she brought up her ex boyfriend a lot, maybe trying to hint at that she was not ready for a relationship just yet.

Over the next few weeks, we hung out a lot, and got quite far. I asked her out three weeks after a really wonderful deep conversation, and we did a lot after that, she then said that she did not know.

So she kind of left me hanging there, then a week later, we did something similar to that night, and the next day I told her that my feelings had advanced, and that I was in love with her. She seemed flattered, but then again told me she is not ready for a relationship.

So I do not really understand, we both did a lot of things together, and we got quite far, I almost feel led on, and then I brought up that if we weren't going to date, then that we should probably hold off on the physical part for a while, I really don't think its right to do stuff like that while not in a relationship, and she hesitated for a bit and agreed.

I know it seems lame that I said that I'm in love with her, but I really am, we have so much in common, and we have the most wonderful conversations, she's incredibly good looking and she's intelligent.

To sum it all up, what do you think the best thing would be? She said for me to just maybe try dating other people, but frankly, I do not want to, I think perhaps she might just be trying to see how loyal I really am because of past relationships that have ended up getting her hurt. I'm thinking of just waiting for her to be ready.

What do you believe I should do?

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  1. yeah i feel you man you should talk to her and say you know we been dating for awhile and i know that you had bad relationships but you know me and we have dated and laugh had good times nothing went bad and i said i love you so you have to trust me when i say that i won't hurt you but her being unsure is tricky cause people like that usually let things go quick so i think you should wait but after while if no progess has been made after all that talking you done with her you have no choice but to see somebody else  


  2. She's just confused.

    All a sudden you tell her you love/like her right after her relationship.

    In her mind, she's probably like "why didn't he tell me earlier?" or something similiar to that.

    Continue talking and hanging out with her.

    Don't pressure her (or continue asking her out). Let her be on her own terms.  

  3. hey... well... i think you should be patient. she was surprised when you told her you loved her.. maybe she thought you were going to fast, or maybe shes scared and thinks that you will hurt her like the other guys. i think you should just wait and see what happens, don't make it obvious that you want her back, i promise you she will wonder why you haven't been bothering to get back with her and then she'll come to you. also i think there is someone for everyone... and if its not her, then maybe you'll have a better girl who you fall more in love with, and she will love you back. but just be patient and if God wants you guys to be together.. then you will be.. just not at this moment... if not then there will be a better girl for you in the future.  

  4. Well it seems like to me that she likes you but she needs time to herself. Sometimes when you get into a relationship and things don't go well you close yourself off to getting into another relationship. Give her time, but if she takes forever just tell her that you are not like other guys and you would do anything to hurt her she will come around. Trust me!

  5. Well I enjoy the fact that someone here can actually write and use punctuation! You should probably just wait until she is ready thats my opinion.

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