Just need to vent, but I have a question too?

Question

So my fiance met up with an old friend, that's fine, they hung out earlier in the week (his friend has a boat and they took it out) My fiance didn't come home until 2 in the morning... I was okay with that, after all he hasn't seen him friend in a while and he hasn't gone out and had fun in quite some time... so tonight he goes out with him again to go boating... his friends wife and I both have babies so we cannot go boating until 2 in the morning... it's now almost 1 in the morning and I still havent heard from my fiance, I havent called him because I dont want to be nagging, but seriously I think he should be home before now, I'm here with a teething 7 month old who's been up like 5 times in the past hour crying... I havent been out with my friends since I got pregnant, so it's been over a year, not even out to eat with them, and here it is 1 in the morning and he's sailing away having a good ole time... Okay theres the venting part... now my question, how can I keep from completely blowing up on him when he gets home?

Answer 1

Good luck girl! I don't know, but if it makes you feel even a little better my husband was out until 6:30 this morning and our 10 mo. old is cutting her two top teeth and hasn't slept all night in over a week. Needless to say he got his butt chewed out this morning. Sometimes it makes you feel better toyell at them.  

Answer 2

I agree with the go to sleep cuz I would hit him

What part of KY are you from? I live in that state too

I live in north Central KY  Near Fort knox Louisville area

Answer 3

oh darlin....

I am in the same boat except instead of boating it's my hubby's new job (that they keep him at 14-16 hours a day and then its his bedtime).  A sick little boy, who is also teething, and a dog that is ALSO puking his guts out (for the last 2 days).  I have slept 5 hours in 2 days and am ready to scream (actually I did that this morning at 1:30, LOUDLY and then cried for 2 hours)

I dont know what to tell oyu about not blowing up...I did at my hubby (which wasnt fair since he's working not out playing) but I did have to finally tell him that I am stressed and feel like the worlds worst mom since I cant calm my poor little man down!!

Take a deep breath, and if you blpow up you can apologize later!!

My heart goes out to you....I know how you feel!!  ((hugs))

(I havent been out either...)

Answer 4

Try to sleep while the baby's sleeping so you're not cranky, lol.  Or listen to some music, do some cleaning, etc.

Then when he gets home, calmly tell him that you've been neglecting yourself and your friends and you would like to have a night out.  Say something like, "Hey, since you got a bit of a break the past two nights, do you mind taking care of the baby so I can schedule a night out with some friends?"  And, he's a guy, lol, so tell him how much you'd *appreciate* (wink wink) it.  

And you can always remind him about how understanding, trusting, and mature you've been about it.  There are some women (including myself at one time, until I found someone I could trust) that don't allow that at all, period.

Don't blow up, though.  You said yourself that you're fine with where he is.  So it's obvious you both have a nice, trustworthy and respectful relationship.  You know he's not out doing anything wrong.  And be proud of yourself for not getting catty about it!  Just continue being mature about it when he gets in.  I understand being frustrated because of taking care of  a teething baby by yourself.  I've been there, lol.  But you were unselfish enough to let him enjoy himself.  It's only right that he gives you time to do the same.

Answer 5

If it really bothers you (i bet it does!) write everything that you expect from him (be home at a reasonable time, etc) and everything you want to do (go out with friends)..then tuck it away somewhere he won't see it. Go to sleep and don't say anything until the morning. He won't appriciate you yelling at him while hes in a good mood, and you will probably overpreact and make it worse than it is. In the morning, sit down with him, and tell him in a nice way, that you wish you could go out with YOUR friends...you know..just talk it out. No need to yell, it doesn't sound as if he does it all the time. Good luck

Answer 6

i find the best way to not blow up when my fiance gets home from something like this is to be sleeping when it happens. mind you, this will be difficult with a teething baby. try to relax before he gets home and even though your mad, you dont have to show it. calmly explain to him that you dont feel its fair that he isnt doing his share tonight and that your tired and need a break. maybe even waiting until morning to talk to him is a good idea. i know i find it hard to talk when i'm steamed up!

Answer 7

I don't know..you sound pretty frustrated.  Just try to calm down.  Why haven't you been out at all?  That's silly, you can take your baby to go have a meal with your friends, just to get out of the house.  Or have your fiance watch the baby for an hour or two and you should be fine.  You need to get out of the house!!!

good luck

Answer 8

   Well you could call a friend on the phone and talk if it's not too late and then when he gets home you will probibly have calmed down and then can calmly explain to him that you've been alone with a teething baby all night and that he should have at least called. It's just a thought, talking to friends or family usually helps me calm down when I'm angry. Good luck.  

Answer 9

I would do something that relaxes you until you can get to sleep. Do anything that you can to draw your mind away from the bone head.  

Answer 10

When we had our first child my partner used to go out an say he'd be back soon then i wouldn't see or hear from him for like 6 hours it used to really p**s me off, so when he got home i would grab the keys an tell him to look after the baby ill be back in an hour and would go an visit friends for a few hours...after a few times of being left with a crying baby for hours on end he soon stopped dissapearing for hours on end!

Answer 11

I would go to sleep because otherwise I would blow up at him.