Just wondering:virgin on wedding night?

Question

i am christian and I have always been told that you should be a virgin until your wedding night. I think it is a good idea because you don't have to worry about std's and getting pregnant. but i am also like worried i guess you could say that I wouldn't know what to do(lmao) like do most girls just "know"

Answer 1

Well when you get there you'll know.

From what I heard, it hurts a LOT down there...

xo Julie ox

Answer 2

Don't you worry about not knowing what to do!  You'll know exactly what to do.

It will be special and wonderful for the both of you.

Don't listen to the crowd that says you have to have s*x like the pro's before you get married.  You stick to your guns.

Answer 3

Well, I'm going to marry the man I love and I plan on only being with him. So I see no reason to wait for marriage, as I see marriage as only a big party to celebrate our union and get tax breaks.

You don't just "know" what to do, you have to learn as you go. It's pretty akward at first.  It hurts a bit the first time, too. It took us a few months to get it perfect and for it to stop being so akward.  But I'm not saying you shouldn't wait. If that's what you want, go ahead.

Answer 4

I unfortunately wasn't, but neither was my husband. This is going to sound really bad, but you might want to make sure that you both know what you're doing because it would suck to have bad s*x for the rest of your life. Sorry, I just had to get that out there. However, if you wait until your wedding night, that's wonderful! Not many people do that anymore! Plus, if you're both virgins, then you have nothing to worry about, because you both would be just as new at it!

Answer 5

Good for you wanting to wait.  When it comes time for you to get married you will be more mature and when it comes time for your wedding night you will just 'magically know' what to do.

Answer 6

My husband and I were both virgins when we married.  And no, we didn't "magically" know what to do, but we were educated young adults who knew enough.  We'd both had anatomy/ s*x ed classes, we'd read appropriate Christian books about marriage (and specifically the physical part of marriage) before the wedding, I'd been to the gynecologist for birth control, my mother was very open about what to expect and so on.....  

Now when it came down to the actual act of intercourse, yes, it was awkward.  Knowing the basics and putting them into practice are two different things.  But it was a learning process we shared together and would not trade for anything.  I supppose the s*x might have been better if one or both of us had prior experience, but the intimacy of knowing we are each other's one and only far surpasses the idea of having mind-blowing s*x on the wedding night.  You'll have a lifetime to get to know each other that way and for me, 13 yrs into marriage, it has never been better.

Answer 7

I'm glad you are mature enough to ask the question at this point in your life.  I'm 24, and my BF and I are BOTH still virgins.  It's not for lack of beng asked (we both have had 'offers'), but we both really want to give each otehr the gift that we can only give once.  Sure, he's Christian and so am I, and I could go on about the morals and quote scripture and so forth, but it comes down to one basic question: What does your heart tell you, and does it match your mind?  If you are unsure, then that shuold tell you right there what the right path is.  I know it  isn't easy, oh man do I know it.  Advice?  I think you already know the answer.  Just one note: when (not if) your BF tells you that he wants to 'be with you', remember to tell him "If you love me, please respect my feelings, and wait for our day together."  A real man will wait with you.

Answer 8

Hmmm... In some ways I want to stay a virgin until my wedding night, and in other ways, I don't want to wait. I don't want to wait because I kind of want to explore before choosing one guy to be with for the rest of my life. Like my mom says, wouldn't it suck to marry a guy and not have s*x until you are married, and find out that you hate having s*x with them?! But I don't completely agree with that, although she makes a good point. In some ways I want to wait. Im a Christian, so I have been taught that you wait until marriage. And I think the idea of loosing your virginity on your wedding night is very appealing. It would give you something to look forward to I guess. I don't know, and I can't decide now! I will just do what feels right, and have no regrets. And im not planning on loosing it anytime soon, im only 15! But, I have always said I would like to loose my virginity when I was 17. I even took quizes and they said 17 for me! So, whatever! Im just going with the flow!

xoxo Jadee♥

Answer 9

Honestly, s*x doesn't feel all that great the first time. But I'm sure that the satisfaction of saving yourself for your husband would make it all worth while.

I'm sure you would know what to do, or you would catch on really quickly ha ha. I really wouldn't worry about it.

Its nice to see a responsible teen.

<3 Hope this helps.

Answer 10

you'll know what to do.

cuz really there's nothing to actually do.

You're smart to want to wait til marriage

Answer 11

I was always told the same thing about waiting. It seems like well-meaning Christian parents and teachers always tell you what not to do, but never the reasoning behind it. When you have any kind of intimate or sexual experience, it is so much sweeter if you know that the person you are sharing yourself with will be there for you and love you unconditionally forever. Trust me from experience: When you're young, you don't know if your boyfriend will be there forever. You probably don't even think that far ahead. But the thing is, if you mess up and give your virginity to the wrong person, or even get too involved with the wrong person, you'll only regret it when you find the right one. Your virginity is something you only have once. You are the one who can choose whom you will share that special gift with. God thinks that it's wiser to wait until you are committed to someone, but the choice is still yours. Believe me though...when I found my prince charming, I wanted to take back even the kisses I gave to the frogs.

Answer 12

It will come natural.  No need to worry.

Answer 13

well if you are both virgin, your partner wont know what to do either

Answer 14

Well, back in the day, no one knew what they were doing on their wedding night, because not every kid had already had s*x by the age of 14. s*x used to have a moral meaning. It was something special shared between a husband and wife. There weren't 1938483094840 teen pregnancies.. There were some, but it wasn't to the extreme like it is now.

s*x is blown out of proportion these days in music, media, movies, tv, magazines, etc. You can't escape it. We have grown up with it EVERYWHERE! The media has completely ruined the morality of s*x, and has made it into more of an activity if you're bored, or what you do after "going out" for 2 weeks... it's sad really..

So, kudos to you for wanting to save s*x for marriage=)

It's fine, and don't worry about it. You will know generally what to do, and the rest will come naturally.

Yes, you will not have to worry about std's and such, but your first time will also be special. You shared it with your spouse, not some kid you may or may not be with a month down the road..

Answer 15

I just recently got married and my husband and I both waited. It was well worth it! Yes it is awkward because neither party "knows" what to do, but wouldn't it be more awkward if it wasn't with someone you were going to spend the rest of your life with? For me waiting provided security that couldn't be surpassed. Also to give you a bit of background, my husband and I were together for all of high school (altogether 5 years before marriage) so we had many opportunities to not wait, but we did. Mostly it gave me satisfaction that I did what was right, that feeling comes from something that can't be compromised or imitated. Also, when you get married, hopefully you'll marry someone you love more than life itself, then the love you share will well overpower awkward first time s*x ha ha and I'm serious! Stick to what your heart and mind are telling you, not emotions and insecurities! It will be worth it I promise!

Answer 16

If not knowing what to do is your only worry, and if its your beliefs, then you should remain a virgin.

If you are with someone you love, they will teach you what to do, or you will learn together.

I dont think men really mind virgins.

I dont think it is as common as it used to be to remain a virgin til your wedding night, I never had the want to, but if you do, then that is your decision.

As you said tho, you are young and really dont need to worry about that sort of thing. Just give yourself a couple/few yrs, that is plenty time to make up your mind.

I do hope that if and when you get married it is out of love and not because you feel the need because you had s*x.

Answer 17

Meh...Im 15, my boyfriend is 16, i love him with all my heart, and i lost my viginity to him a few months ago. Im on birth control and have no pregnancy concerns what so ever, plus we were both virgins thus i do no fear std's.