Kids and respect?

Question

This is really bugging me. I notice people constantly complaining on yahoo answers about the lack of respect kids have now a days.

YET when I answered a question about making kids refer to adults as Mr. and Mrs or Ma'am and sir. I got thumbs down for saying My kids do refer to people as Mr.and Mrs. They even on occassion refer to me as Ma'am for example if I say "I want you to go clean your room they will say "yes ma'am" this is because I have taught them respect. When they were young and they would try to argue with me about doing something I would say to them "the only thing I want to hear out of you when I tell you to do something is "yes ma'am". Now that my kids are older they don't argue because they know it's pointless. They've learned respect. Isn't that what people want from kids today? So why did I get thumbs down for teaching my kids respect?

My oldest are 13 yr old twins and honor students and my 11 yr old is a straight A student. I get compliments from teachers and

Answer 1

I definitely know what you're saying.  My son is allowed to call adults by their first name, but only if they have specifically given him permission to do so.  Otherwise, it's Mr./Mrs. and ma'am/sir.  He says please, thank you, excuse me, shakes people's hands when he meets them, holds doors, and even gives up his seat on the crowded subway to women and seniors.  I have had people actually tell me that I'm too strict for teaching him etiquette.  Don't get me wrong - he's still a kid.  He occasionally burps in public or does something equally rude.  But I want him to have an understanding of what is and is not polite.  Now, the same people who say that I'm too strict when it comes to teaching etiquette also complain about how kids these days have no respect.  

As for the people giving you thumbs down, they're probably either kids or adults whose kids were never taught manners.  Rest assured knowing that you are teaching your children very important life lessons, and they will be better people because of it.

Answer 2

Respect is extremely important and too few people bother to teach their kids anything of value anymore. It's easier for them to sit them in front of a TV or a computer and let that teach them everything, so they don't bother to throw in "old fashioned" values like respect, pride, confidence, etc.

Answer 3

The people who probably gave u thumbs down were scared little kids who didnt want older people to see it and get ideas. its good that u r that way with ur kids. everyone who thumbs down-ed you is just being dumb

Answer 4

i think you are doing fine. now days how can you be mad at someone for having respectful kids when there is all these teens in gangs, doing drugs, and getting pregnant. i wanna give you two thumbs up i am very proud of you. and when my kids get older i want them to respect me like that, because i believe if you have respect for adults then you will have respect for your self. congrats and i wanna say congrats on you children

Answer 5

I definitely want my kids---ages 10, 9, 16 months, and last one on the way---to be respectful (and they are), and to have manners (they do), but I wouldn't want them to call me 'Ma'am.' I'm their mom, and want to be referred to as such, but, that's my personal choice... If yours call you 'ma'am,' I don't see the big deal, or why you were given a thumbs down.

Answer 6

If a child is disrespectful, it is learned in their home.  I completely agree with you, I say to my son who is now 15 yrs old quite often that I don't want to hear anything out of him except okay.  And I have taught him to be respectful by words, and by example.  And I take comfort (and so should you), that when people say things like that, they are not speaking of my son.

Answer 7

i think you are freaking awesome. some people just want to hate. especially people who don't have kids.

Answer 8

sorry but my children do respect me but none of them had the need to call me Ma'am I was mum

Answer 9

I applaud you.....I think that it is wonderful that your children respect not only you but other adults as well. I personally love that my children are respectful. I have adopted many "old fashioned" parenting strategies and glad I did. I hear a lot of comments all the time about how strict I am or how my expectations of my children are too high. My opinion is, I'll do what works for me and you do what works for you. I have 5 very happy kids and a very calm loving home and proud of it. You don't see that a lot now days so obviously something in my old fashioned ways is working. You keep doing what works for you and ignore all those comments. As parents we have to fallow our hearts and do what we know is right by our children.

Answer 10

some people just troll around giving kids thumbs down. I would not have given a thumbs down for that.. but I would have disagreed. I teach my kids to give respect on merit, not on age. Not all adults are worthy of respect. And kids are too often treated as 'almost people'... there is not respectful name given to them.

I don't spank either and my kids are very respectful. But I do disagree with the Mrs. and Mr. thing... what if that is an abusive person or a pedophile? No, respect is earned.. not all adults deserve that. Having said that, my daughter calls me 'ma'am' too, and I never taught her that... she just started doing that on her own.

Answer 11

My children also refer to adults as ma'am and sir. It is a respect thing. Even if kids don't use the ma'am and sir there is still a level of respect and behavior that should be required of them and yes it is true, this country's children are rapidly loosing all discipline, respect, and good behavior!! Parents are becoming much to liberal with their children and parenting styles. Whatever happened to consequences? Whatever happened to kids wanting to please their parents? Parents are not even spending as much time with their children now days. Can you believe that most of the parents that I know actually go out drinking and partying 3 nights a week/weekend? I actually had a mom say to me that she gets so sick and tired of her kids that on top of the drinking nightly and dropping her kids off at her mother in laws every weekend, all weekend, she needs time for herself once a week and she goes gambling all day at the casino. RIDICULOUS!!! your children should come first. Whatever happened to stay at home moms? Whatever happened to home cooked meals and sit down dinners? Whatever happened to chores? TV is not a babysitter! box, PlayStation and Nintendo needs to be limited. Spend some quality time with your children parents!!! This country's level of whats expected of them is going to h**l in a hand basket!!! We need to start changing things!! You didn't ever see these problems in the 40's and 50's!!!

I know I am going to get a lot of thumbs down for this but I agree with you kids need more respect and discipline!! At least we can be proud of the way we have chosen to raise our children!!! You are an outstanding parent and keep up the good work!!!!!!!