Ladies, is there a reason why I can't get dates despite my superb qualities...?

Question

- I live on the Continent of Texas in the back of my pickup truck.

- I also drive a 1978 Dodge Aries where the passenger door doesn't open from the outside (to impress the ladies).

- My diet consists primarily of Grade C meat products, e.g. bologna sandwiches.

- I consume more alcohol per unit time than any human being on my continent. (And generally, I like to consume my beer from mason jars).

- I have ZERO sexual capabilities and my genitals are highly ambiguous, I may have clitoromegaly or a micro-p***s (we're not sure)

- I have zero education, none.

- You would have a more interesting conversation with a cup of coffee than with me.

- I look like a mix between Larry King and Kramer from Seinfeld, only much more unattractive than either.

- I've been reading Ulysses by J. Joyce for 19 years and still don't understand it.

What could possibly be the problem?

Answer 1

hahahahaha

Answer 2

read all the above you will find the answer

Answer 3

Sound great to me. If i wasn't married I'd date you.

Answer 4

|:

You just need to meet more guys {:

Answer 5

Have you considered growing a handlebar mustache? I think that would help tremendously.

Answer 6

Everything you listed is the problem.

BWAHAHAHA I read every one of your qualitites.

What a funny made up question.

Answer 7

You're lacking in geology or whatever it's called (brain's fried on Green Tea) because ( best sit down) Texas is not a continent.

The part about the 1978 car could be you want to keep the ladies in; can't blame you there.

The Balogna sandwiches must mean you have the Oscar Mayer song down pat.

You're (cough) is so small an ant will die from laughing too hard.

Well, for a man who has no education your punctuation is good.

About that conversation thing let's see how you and a coffee bean get along.

As for looks they say beauty is only skin deep; at least mommy loves her little cuddly poo.

Well at least you don't consume your beer from buckets.

Well, the problem is you're just too much fun.