Ladies why do we do this to ourselves?

Question

Girls go ahead and admit it, for the most part we aren't very nice to each other are we?

Of course there are always the sweet ones who never had a bad thing to say but I can guarantee you that at some point in our lives we have made AT LEAST one catty, vindictive and snide remark to another female for seemingly no reason other than to put her down.

I believe that all people are equal but sometimes I don't blame many guys for staying away from us or saying some of the mean but sometimes true things they say(guys don't get a big head about this)

So what's with all the girl on girl hate? You would think if we really wanted to be taken seriously then we would band together as a unit and support each other. Sadly, that's not how things go I guess.

So what is your take on all the girl on girl hate? I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions.

Answer 1

I always feel very 'solidarity' with other women - I don't know if it's because I went to a girl's school and just know enough to spot the catty ones but when I'm feeling low, it's my female friends who pick me up again.  I think it also depends on your clique - people are always going to b*tch about people outside of their group - it's just a way of sticking together.  Personally, I'm an equal opportunities offender for men and women :-)

Answer 2

The hate is purely insecurity. I used to be a hater when I was younger, mainly because I always felt as though I were competition with other girls. And I was.

I moved to a new high school at 15, if that tells you anything. Culture shock!

As I got older, the more I realized I needed female companionship. The friends I had I'd either outgrown or they moved, and I met other women through working. I consider myself very lucky - I have many female friends.

When you act like human beings to each other instead thinking someone is out to get you or take something away - you realize what you've been missing.

Answer 3

Men are often much more self confident than women.  Even drop dead gorgeous women can have such screwed up body images that they are just not self confident.

Women are much more verbal than men, and say many more words in a day than men.  Women are "programed" to talk to each other, and children (and of course men).  Men are "programed" to be much more quiet than women.  In evolutionary terms this makes a lot of sence.  Women were the gatherers, and talked to each other, and children about what was, and was not edible.  Men were out hunting...when hunting, being quiet is the best bet.

Traditionally,  in most societies there are more women than men.  Men put themselves in harms way more than women, so once women start to reach puperty the women start to outnumber the men.  That makes women competative for a good mate.  Part of being competative is to  bash on the compitition.

Those are the three basic reasons women are catty.

~Garnet

Answer 4

without sounding like an @ss, I think you're speaking for yourself.  I'm not vindictive without reason or justification and I never initiate cruelty.  I've never been catty or made snide remarks because always having been on the outside looking in, one learns quickly how it feels to be on the receiving end of cruelty.

I do agree with the idea of unity though - that's the ONLY way women will gain power.  We absolutely need to stop being our own worse enemy.

The meaning behind the words is that as long as women buy into the fact that men dictate what they wear (designers), how their hair should look (hair stylists), how to apply their make-up (make-up artists), continue to be exploited as s*x objects, ad nauseam - as long as women fail to support each other or themselves as independent entities, to use your words, "banding together as a unit" will remain an  impossible dream because until we do, we continue to be our own worse enemy.  As long as we buy into this crapola, we hold ourselves back.

No where do I say one group should out power another - I'm focusing on coming out from under the rock of patriarchy - a system that's been in power for centuries.

Answer 5

Well of course I can admit to doing so. Though I can't say I've done anything like that since school. Drama and the like are relatively on the low-down in my life since school, and I like it like that.

Anyway, I think it's female nature to be against one another while at the same time going hand-in-hand. We are complex beings and in order to have satisfaction we must have competition. In order for competition to happen there will be ruthlessness involved, and most females don't refrain from the occasional rude remark.

The unification issue baffles me though. There are so many feminists out there (me being a part of them), but they are constantly at each other for something. If we could join in some sort of similar taste and opinion we might get something accomplished. I'm not trying to play the blame game here, but I'm not exactly saying every feminist out there is innocent. Just because I'm a feminist myself doesn't entitle me to like them all, or even agree with them all. For the most part, about half of them are snide and have nothing to provide to the salvation of modernized women.

Anyway, I'm glad someone out here has enough intellect to realize that women are being hypocritical of themselves lately. Trying to stop it would be a waste of breath, but I give props to you for at least addressing it. Thank you.

Answer 6

True, alot of women do this, but in the defense of women, so do men.

We bug each other  ALOT!

Answer 7

Men never have this problem.

We just violently beat the sh*t out of someone that doesn't fit in on a routine basis until they kill themselves or everyone around them.

Answer 8

women as a general rule are jealous of each other for reasons unknown thats why i have mostly male friends they arent as judgemental or rude or backstabbing as females.... and YES they are all JUST friends and NO they are NOT g*y LOL!! and also i am married!!

Answer 9

WOMEN ARE CATTY, I am not, but most are!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

here's the thing: i have some GREAT girlfriends, but I've always had close male friends. i have a lot of brothers, so i usually just mesh better with men. i am crude, direct, and a foul mouth. i joke constantly and i am a huge goofball. that said, i am also a mother, a nurturer, a total girl.

i don't think that all women are catty. that is another stereotype that is even more detrimental to our s*x than the occasional bi otch. and lets not act as if women are the only ones that can be catty; i have my share of gossipy guy pals as well.

i do agree about sisterhood and it's merit. i try to keep from bringing us down.

Answer 11

i can admit that "we" females are bi@tches to each other.

the reason behind it, i believe to be primarily JEALOUSY, in our human nature we are jealous when another female has something (in our eyes at that said time) better than us.

I do BELIEVE that we would be a STRONGER if we could stop so much hatred towards each other.

Why is it that when MEN have a problem/jealousy with each other they just go out and seek it or work harder to get it (pardon the pun). They don't hold it against each other that they have something better.

And I know they don't go behind their back and say stuff like "I cant believe she did that" or c**p like that. Men have a what I call ADD towards where in five minutes they usually forget about it, so who cares.

I have always been able to be the sort of "tomboy" so to speak and my best friends were guys. Its been easier for me to get the "straight up" honesty guys bring to the relationship. (and not to get weird remarks {girl on girl hate} but i'm happily married to the greates MAN in the world, he is also my best friend)

The SAD but TRUTH of it is that women are bi@tches! (i can also admit that it includes me, because even though I stay away from drama/chaos if I hear it about me I don't stay quite, I confront ANY female for their bitchyne$$)

I can honestly say that this part of human nature annoys me, for I do wish that we should join together and support each other with our own individualism!!!!

Answer 12

I blame public school, it puts young girls in a competitive environment with no social guidance -- thus catty ways are learned for life.

Answer 13

I have never put down another female in a vituperative or snide manner.I have spoken about other women with other girlfriends if I have been hurt by them or I have likewise discussed someone's character with them. I really cannot consider that 'bitching' per say, as it never reaches a low and  petty level. It is more about assessing the integrity of another person and avoiding the cheats and liars and shallow people.  I try my best to be good to other people. I really do not like to hurt others  or to betray friends in that manner.

Answer 14

I don't know, but I never understood it.  If I'm nasty to someone, I have a damned good reason and I let him or her know what it is.

What satisfaction can anyone get out of mindless cruelty?