Lazy, irresponsible 11 year old brother.?

Question

I have a eleven year old brother that is lazy and irresponsible. He literally plays his computer while watching television all day long, and the only time he moves is when I drag him to play tennis with me, which he refuses to go now. He also has a lot of other bad habits that are embarrassing to talk about, he has bad manner, bad eating manners, and he cries whenever he doesn't get his way. Not even his parents can do anything about it, and when they try he usually just cry, get in a big fight, or other things. What should we do?

Answer 1

This is really a problem for the parents.  they need to BE parents, otherwise nothing will change.  He's 11 for pete's sake.

Answer 2

Ask him what he wants to do outside. At least one hour outside.

Playing on the computer and watching the television is a privilege not a right.

Start time limits on both and if he can't abide by the rules then he will lose either one privilege of watch TV or using the computer.

With the computer I'm sure he has to log-in (is this a family computer?)

if this is a family computer on of the adults or you can turn off his privileges or delete his password and make it a new one and the tv have a password on that as well.

If it isn't a family computer, then shut it down and lock it away.

If he starts to abide by following rules allow him to use his computer but move it into the family area and away from the TV.  And praise him when he is doing well.

Answer 3

He's only 11, so there isn't much for to do other than wait for him to grow up. He's a kid, it's normal.

Maybe he doesn't want to go with you to play tennis because he doesn't like it. Of course he isn't going to want to go if he doesn't enjoy it. Why not do something that interests him? Take him to an amusement park one day. Start to bond with him, other than telling him about his flaws. Just be an older sibling for now instead of a parent. Take him to play football or basketball or sign him up for baseball. And I'm sure when school starts he'll get back in the swing of things.

Answer 4

Unfortunately, this behavior starts early (think infant).

A good thing to do is not feed into this behavior.  He's old enough to be aware of what he is doing, so he's most likely doing these things on purpose.

Take the computer and TV away.  Find activities (aside from computer and tv) that he likes to do.  Ignore his tantrums.  Be firm with him and don't give in.

Maybe taking him to counseling will help?  There may be underlying problems that your family is not aware of that can be helped with therapy/medication.

Answer 5

I can relate! I also have an 11 year old brother who is the same. All my friends (including me) call him the 'miracle baby' because he had a stroke when he was three. So that makes him think he can do whatever he wants. So i'm always doing his chores or reminding him to do them. And we fight a lot to.

Answer 6

send him to military school he needs to grow up!

Answer 7

AHHh somone has the same problem as me what do u know!!! i ignore my bro AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE if he want to ruin his life he shouldnt drag u down 2